Turbulence
by XxMissMarauderxX
Summary: A story of love, friendship and heartache, in which James must grow up for Lily, and Lily must finally confront her feelings.
1. Chapter 1 - Lily Evans

It was that time of the month again... No, not what you're thinking. It was Diagon Alley time again. Lily could have sworn it was only a couple of weeks ago the last time she was getting ready for another year at Hogwarts. But this year wasn't just another year at Hogwarts. It was her _last_ year at Hogwarts.

Just two days ago Lily received her letter from Hogwarts; the usual message about books and equipment, along with another small surprise.

Ever since Lily started at Hogwarts, she had been top of the class, except Transfiguration. That was Potter's best subject. She was good at it, no doubt about that, but Potter was better. Despite Potter's antics, Lily manages to keep up with homework and Prefect duties. The other Prefect of Gryffindor was Remus Lupin. Although he's a part of Potter's gang who call themselves the _Marauders _– whatever the hell that meant – Remus is the only one who Lily seems to be able to have a civilized conversation with. It seems, because of all Lily's hard work, Dumbledore saw fit to award her with the position as Head Girl, which she discovered in her Hogwarts letter just days ago. The letter didn't tell her who the Head Boy was but she was sure it was Remus. Or maybe the cute Ravenclaw boy she knew, Alex Rivers. No one knows that Lily has had a bit of a crush on Alex since the end of her fifth year. There's just something about Alex's dirty blonde hair and crystal blue eyes that look transparent in the light and glow in the dark that makes Lily's insides sizzle. She hasn't really done much about this crush though. To be honest, she doesn't have enough time for a boyfriend. Especially not this year being Head Girl and taking two extra subject and whatnot.

Lily's parents get a kick out of going to Diagon Alley with her, but sometimes it's a bit embarrassing. Her parents don't usually see places like that so they're a clear indication that Lily is muggle-born. Not that she cares, but she really doesn't need the extra criticism from the Slytherin's.

Today her parents won't be coming, just her two friends from Hogwarts, Morgan Reid and Louise Taylor. They all met on the Hogwarts Express in their first year and had been friends ever since. Lily didn't know anyone then, except her friend Severus Snape, but he had already gone off to see his other friends that he had been talking about. Lily had continued down the carriage, looking for an empty compartment. After searching the whole train, Lily settled for the compartment that had held two young girls about her age. Lily asked if she could join them. They invited her in and introduced themselves as Morgan and Louise.

Lily got dressed into a pair of light wash denim skinny jeans, a green knit sweater and a pair of white Converses. She quickly pinned back the front section of her hair, pocketed her book list and jogged downstairs. It was about eleven o'clock and Lily's parents weren't ones to rise early on weekends. So when Lily entered the kitchen she was welcomed by the smell off eggs sizzling on the frypan. Standing at the stove was Mrs Evans, cooking the eggs. Mr Evans was sitting at the kitchen bench reading a paper. Lily's older sister Petunia was most likely still in her bedroom.

Mr Evans looked up from his paper and gave Lily a warm smile. "Good morning, Flower?" _Why do they always have to call me that? _ Lily thought to herself.

"Morning," she replied, plopping down into the seat across from her dad.

"Eggs?" Mrs Evans asked. Lily nodded as she was served.

"Are you sure you don't want us to come to Diagon Alley with you?" Lily's dad asked hopefully for the hundredth time.

"Nah, it's okay, dad. I'm meeting Morgan and Louise, anyway." Lily replied. Her dad nodded. Mrs Evans went back to cooking and Mr Evans went back to his paper.

Lily ate her eggs quietly, going through a list of things she needed to get. Her robes were fine; all she needed were her books, more potion ingredients and she though she may as well buy some treats for her owl, Effie. In about fifteen minutes she'd have to get going. Lily planned on Flooing to Flourish and Blotts then meet Morgan and Louise outside Gringotts.

Her dad, as though he had read her mind, asked "So how are you getting there? Through the fire thing – whatever you call it – or apparate? I can drive you to the Leaky Cauldron if you like?"

"I'm just going to Floo – going through the fire thing – to Diagon Alley. Thanks anyway, dad."

"Where are you meeting Morgan and Louise?" Mrs Evans asked.

"Outside Gringotts," Lily checked her watch, "I should leave soon."

"What's Gringotts again?" Her dad asked curiously.

"It's the wizard bank. That massive marble building I showed you." Lily explained.

"Ahh," said Mr Evans, nodding his head, "I remember."

"What time will you be back?" Her mother asked, slowly.

Lily looked between them. "Okay, okay, what's with all the questions? What's going on?" She asked, suspiciously.

Petunia entered the room and sat next to her dad.

"Good morning, Tuney," Lily said cautiously, hoping she wouldn't have an argument with her sister this early in the day.

"Morning." Petunia answered stiffly. She started eating her breakfast, looking down and not talking to anyone.

"Anyway," Mrs Evans said, breaking the tension. "Your father and I have something to tell you at dinner, so whatever you two are doing today, please be back before dinner."

Lily couldn't possibly think what her parents wanted to tell her. Life at the Evans house was quite ordinary. Nothing really happens... Ever. That's why Lily was always so eager to get back to Hogwarts. Also because living with her sister and her sister's ugly boyfriend, Vernon, that comes over all the time.

"Why can't you just tell us now?" Petunia asked, rolling her eyes.

"It's a surprise!" Mr Evans replied happily. Lily shrugged her shoulders and 'stood up, putting her dishes in the sink.

"I have to get going," Lily announced, stretching and yawning, "I should be back around five o'clock. Bye!" She called to her family, walking out of the kitchen and through to the living room where the fireplace lived. Lily heard her parents say goodbye. As it always was in the mornings, the fire was lit. Lily sprinkled a handful of Floo powder into the fire before stepping in. The flames licked her skin, but did not burn her. Taking a deep breath, she said very clearly, "Diagon Alley!"


	2. Chapter 2 - Diagon Alley

**Chapter Two**

Lily felt the familiar sensation of travelling through fireplace after fireplace. If she opened her eyes she could see a flash of each fireplace she went through, but opening her eyes made her extremely lightheaded so she squeezed them closed again. She finally came to a stop and tumbled out of the fireplace, her vision slightly blurred. She tried to stand straight but fell forward into something very hard.

"Whoa!" said the person Lily smashed into. Her head was still pounding so she kept her eyes closed.

"Thanks," she mumbled. The person's arms were still around her, holding her up.

"No problem, Evans." _Why does that voice sound familiar?_ Lily thought to herself. Wait a second... Her eyes flew open.

"Get off me, Potter!" She shouted, jumping out of his arms. He grinned smugly to himself. Lily stood up slowly, dusting herself off.

"Nice to bump into you." James said. Lily glared at him and looked around. None of the other Marauders were with him. She started taking in her surroundings. She did indeed end up in Florish and Blotts.

"I think I'll keep my eyes closed next time." She said, trying to break the awkward silence.

"That's probably a good idea." James said, grinning and stuffing his hands deeper into his pockets.

"Well, you've managed to piss me off in under a minute. Well done, that must be a record." Lily said hotly. She straightened her top and walked past him, knocking his shoulder on the way. Lily was so relieve there was no one else in the shop to see what had just happened.

"Lily! Wait!"

_Did he just call me Lily? _She kept walking, pushing through the people of Diagon Alley, trying to reach her friends. She wasn't so lucky. James caught up with her and grabbed her wrist. She really wasn't in the mood to talk to him right now. All she wanted to do was meet her friends and get this day over and done with. But James wasn't letting her go anywhere until he explained himself.

"Lily, would you just hang on a minute! I wasn't doing anything wrong. Do you seriously think I _knew_ you were going to come tumbling out of that particular fireplace? And would you rather I had just let you fall instead of catching you?" He said, crossing his arms. No matter how much he liked Lily, she was always jumping to the wrong conclusions.

Lily knew he was right. She also knew she was too stubborn to admit that. "Yes, I would've preferred that." She answered. James gave her a look that said, _seriously?_ "Okay, sorry, I'm just really not in the mood for you and your friends. Let me just do my stuff and then go home, alright?"

She didn't even say it rudely, which James noticed as well. He was expecting her to shout at him and make up some theory that he somehow knew she would be there, falling out of that fireplace.

"Right. I'm just getting my stuff too. The others aren't even here today. Just me." He said.

"Okay, well, I'll see you later James." She said awkwardly. _I called him James. He called me Lily. What is even going on today? _

She turned and left James standing in the middle of Diagon Alley. James had been too stunned to say goodbye back. She had never called him by his name before. Maybe to some, this wasn't a big deal, but James knew this was a big improvement. Usually it was 'Potter' or 'git' or 'self-centred toe rag'. He didn't know one thing could make him so happy.

"Lily!"

Lily looked up and saw her friends waving to her. They were outside Gringotts wearing their muggle clothes, waiting for her. Morgan was wearing a light blue dress with black tights and a red cardigan. She had her beautiful blonde hair up in a messy bun on top of her head. Louise was wearing her usual black skinny jeans, plain converses and a Guns 'n' Roses shirt on. Her short dark chocolate hair and black make up gave her a rough sort of look, but somehow it suited her. Lily knew she was a softie inside.

Lily ran the rest of the way to them. "Hi, sorry I'm late."

"That's alright, what you been up to?" Louise asked, shouldering her duffle bag.

"Potter. I bumped into him when I got her. Literally." Lily answered.

"Oh Merlin..." Louise said.

"What happened _this_ time?" Morgan asked in a bored voice.

"Oh, shut up. Well, I kind of fell out of the fireplace and he caught me. Then I yelled at him and he followed me out of the store. Then he starts going on about how he did nothing wrong. He even called me by my actual name! I pretty much said whatever and told him I'd see him later. I called him James! Like what is going on? I wasn't even angry." Lily said all of this rather fast.

Louise and Morgan glanced at each other.

"What?" Lily demanded.

"Well, he really likes you. I know you hate it but he really does." Morgan said cautiously. She knew Lily was very sensitive on the subject of James Potter.

"No, he doesn't –" Lily began.

"Just listen, Lily," Louise cut her off, "he's trying really hard. I've been talking to Remus lately. He says James has grown up. Give him a chance."

"I'm not giving me a chance! He may seem like he's grown up but as soon as he's reunited with his precious Marauders, he'll be the exact same stuck up, pigheaded prat he usually is. I can't even stand to be in the same room as him. He thinks he's so good at everything. He thinks he's some sort of God on the Quidditch pitch and that everyone should bow down to him –" Lily was going to continue her rant but Louise and Morgan were giving her threatening looks and gesturing towards something behind her.

Lily turned around. James Potter stood there with his hands behind his back and his head down.

"What do you want, Potter?" Lily said harshly.

"Nothing – I was just – Well, it doesn't matter anymore. I'll see you at Hogwarts, Lily." James mumbled. He turned and walked away. As soon as he was out of earshot, Lily's friends rounded on her.

"What's your problem, Lily?" Morgan said.

"Nothing, he was obviously here to annoy –"

"Maybe he wasn't. Did you ever think about that?" Louise cut her off. Both of Lily's friends were looking at her angrily.

"What if he was here just to talk to you?" Morgan added.

Lily looked down. Maybe they were right. She didn't like it when her friends were this upset with her. She just assumed... Well, she didn't know anymore. Her friends were right. What _was_ her problem?

"I'm sorry, guys. I-I'll find him and a-apologize." Lily stuttered. She felt awful. She didn't like feeling sorry for James Potter. She felt like she was going to burst into tears right here and she couldn't figure out why. Her eyes burned as she turned away from her friends and went looking for James.

First she went to Quality Quidditch Supplies but he wasn't there, only some younger kids fawning over a new model broomstick or something. She was going to have to hurry. It was almost two o'clock and she hadn't bought her books yet.

James wasn't in any of the book stores, potions stores, owl emporium or any sweet shops. Lily finally gave up and sat outside Florean Fortescues Ice-cream Parlour.

Lily put her head in her hands and let the silent tears fall. She had never felt like this before. It felt as though she was letting out a whole years-worth of ears - all the pressures of homework, arguments with Petunia and now James - Lily couldn't keep it in anymore. Her tears weren't as silent anymore. She sobbed but no one even noticed her.

A warm hand appeared on her shoulder.

Lily looked up through her tears and saw a tall person with broad shoulders, muscly arms and soft dark hair.

"Lily? Are you okay?" The tall man asked.

"Oh hey, James," she sniffled, "I've been looking everywhere for you."

"You have?" He sounded surprised and a little hopeful.

Lily looked back down at her fiddling hands and nodded. "I just wanted to apologize. I shouldn't have gone off at you. I just assumed..."

James sat down opposite her. "That I was coming to bother you." He finished for her. Lily was relieved that he didn't sound angry. She nodded again.

"Don't worry about it. I realized there's no way we could be friends if I kept acting like a 'stuck up, pigheaded prat'." He said, repeating her words. She looked up and saw that he was grinning. She laughed a little.

James though she looked gorgeous even when she was crying. Her smile sent a wave of butterflies through his stomach. That's the first time she had ever smiled at him and he was eager for me.

"I was just going to come and ask you if you and your friends wanted to sit with us on the way to Hogwarts." James asked hopefully, "don't worry; I'll keep Sirius under control. I've gotten to know his weaknesses since he's started living with me." He added.

"He lives with you?" Lily sure as hell didn't know that.

"Yeah, he ran away last holidays and came to my place. Mum and dad love him; he's like their second son." He explained.

"I had no idea. That was nice of your parents. Are they usually that nice?" Lily didn't know why she wanted to know that. She just wanted to keep the conversation going.

"Well they're usually busy at work but when they're home we have a lot of fun." He shrugged. Lily nodded and went back to staring at her fingers. This time it wasn't an awkward silence. It was a comfortable silence. Lily could feel James' eyes on her and she made sure she kept her head down.

"Want to talk about it?" James asked slowly.

"Talk about what?" Lily asked.

"Surely you can't be that upset about what happened earlier. There's something else, isn't it? You can tell me if you want." He said kindly.

He was right of course. James was the last person she expected to talk about her problems with.

"Well, part of it was because of how I acted. The other part is due to my sister. She's a muggle, as you know, and she hates magic. She hates me. We all used to be really close in my family, but now she thinks I'm a freak. I just miss how it used to be." Lily said, looking at her hands.

"I understand. She's just jealous of you, Lily. Who wouldn't want to be you?" He said, making Lily look up. He seemed to realize what he said and laugh uneasily. Lily smiled.

"Come on, let's get your stuff. I've already got mine." James stood up. He really wanted to hold out his hand for her but he didn't want to push his luck. He was actually talking to Lily Evans, _the_ Lily Evans.

Lily stood up and followed James. They talked about everyday things as they bought Lily' books. She learnt that James wasn't at all what she thought. He was just a normal teenage guy. He was funny too, Lily noticed.

James was having the best time of his life. Lily was even more amazing than he thought. He took every chance he could to look at her. At her beautiful red hair and stunning green eyes that left him speechless. When they had finished buying snacks for her owl, Lily checked her watch.

It was almost five o'clock. She hadn't even noticed how much time she had spent with James.

"Dammit, I'm supposed to be home in five minutes. Mum and dad have some sort of special announcement," Lily sighed, "I have to go." She told James, gathering her things in her arms.

"Wait." James stepped closer. Lily's heart pounded. What was he doing? James flicked his wand and shrunk Lily's things so small that they could fit in her pockets. Lily breathed out a sigh of relief. She thought he was going to... Never mind.

"There you go." James said happily.

"Thanks, you're a life saver." She stuffed everything in her pockets.

"So, I'll see you on the Hogwarts Express?" He asked.

"Of course. I really have to go now!" Lily said quickly.

James' face lit up. "See you tomorrow then."

"Yeah, bye." Lily returned a smile. She didn't have time to Floo back so she apparated back to the Evans house.

The last thing she saw was James, his hands in his pockets and the sun low in the sky behind him. She couldn't believe she had spent the day with James Potter and was surprised that she was actually looking forward to tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3 - Kings Cross

**Chapter Three **

It was the first day of Lily's seventh and last year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. She didn't want this to be an ordinary year. Now that she was Head Girl, Lily had more authority and could make an impact on this year. Last night while Lily was sitting in her bed, she made a list of things to do this year:

_Ask Alex Rivers out._

_Organize some sort of ball or dance._

_Massive graduation party._

Al though Lily wasn't the extravagant sort, she though that this was the year to go all out. She pulled her trunk down the front steps and turned to face her parents and Petunia.

"Have a good year. Remember, you must come home for the Christmas holidays!" Mr Evans said happily.

*Last night*

Lily got back from Diagon Alley and made it in time for the 'all important talk' her parents wanted to have. Everyone sat down at the dinner table, acting like everything was normal. Petunia and Lily kept glancing at each other seeing if either one knew what was going on. Dinner continued without Lily's parents mentioning anything about their surprise. When they had finished, Lily and her sister sat in silence and waited. Mr Evans clapped his hands together and announced it was time for them to share the news.

"Well girls, I hope you don't have any plans for Christmas break because we're going on a holiday!" He exclaimed. Mr and Mrs Evans waited for the reaction they were looking for. The girls shared a doubtful look.

"Well?" Mrs Evans asked hopefully.

"Must we go?" Petunia asked sharply.

"Yes! It's a family holiday. Don't you at least want to know where we're going?" Mr Evans said.

"Where are we going?" Lily asked. She did indeed have plans for the Christmas holidays. She was going to stay at Morgan's house with Louise. Not anymore...

"Australia!" Mr and Mrs Evans announced.

"Australia?" Lily asked. She knew it wouldn't be too bad. She didn't know much about Australia; only that there were a lot of kangaroos and koalas there. And apparently it's really warm.

"Yes! Won't it be great?" Mrs Evans said in a cheerful voice.

"Probably but I was going to stay at Morgan's house. I suppose she won't mind..." Lily said.

Lily jumped when she heard Petunia scream.

"NO! IT WON'T BE GREAT! VERNON WAS GOING TO TAKE ME TO FRANCE!" Her face was red and her eyes full of tears. She stood up and stormed away from them.

"You don't mind do you, Lily Flower?" Her dad asked sadly.

"Well, no. But I was looking forward to staying at Morgan's. It's okay though, dad. Don't worry. We'll have heaps of fun!" She answered, trying to cheer her dad up.

"That's my girl." Her dad answered happily, kissing her forehead as he left the table.

*Present*

"I promise. See you guys later. Bye, Tuney!" She said hopefully.

"Yeah, go to your freak school with all your freak friends. And don't come home. Just stay with one of them." She said and stormed off.

"Petunia!" Mrs Evans scolded.

Lily shook her head. "Don't worry, mum. See you at Christmas." She said, hugging her mum and dad.

If she didn't leave now, she was going to miss the train to Hogwarts. Lily was quite anxious about going to Kings Cross. She promised James she would sit with them. She was worried that James would go back to his normal self when he was around his friends. She actually liked the James he was yesterday at Diagon Alley. Also, she'd have to tell her friends what happened and endure them saying, "I told you so."

Lily waved one last goodbye and spun on the spot, holding onto her trunk. She arrived instantly outside Kings Cross station. It would be a bit suspicious of she just appeared on platforms nine and ten. Lily had to wait for some younger students to go through first before it was her turn. She walked casually towards the wall with her trunks bumping along behind her. She appeared on the other side and smelt the familiar smoke from the steam engine. She heard the usual sound of students jabbering away to each other and owls hotting, cats meowing and toads croaking. She couldn't believe this was the last time she would ever stand here.

She ventured further down the platform in search of her friends. She would find them first then find the marauders. Lily found them leaning against one of the pillars in the middle of the platform.

"Hey guys. You have no idea what mum and dad told me last night." Lily said.

"Good or bad?" Louise asked.

"Both, I suppose."

"Hit me." Morgan said.

Lily laughed. "Well, bad news is I can't stay at your house, Morgan, for Christmas holidays. Good news is I'm going to Australia."

"Well that's not bad! I don't mind. I mean, you get to go to Australia! I've heard the guys there are hot." Morgan grinned. Lily and Louise laughed.

Lily heaved her trunk onto the train and her friends followed. They continued further down the train and were lucky enough to find a compartment to themselves.

"Oh, Lily, I forgot to ask you. Did you find James yesterday?" Louise asked.

Lily sighed. She was hoping to avoid this conversation. She tried to think of an excuse not to explain what happened but her friends weren't ones to let things go that easily. Especially because they think Lily secretly likes James. But she'd always hated him. Hate was a bit of an understatement; she despised him. Loathed him even. After yesterday though, she could sort of picture them beings friends. But she'd never like him that way.

Lily decided the truth was better than nothing. She told her friends everything that happened. "Anyway so he asked if we wanted to sit with him and the Marauders today. I said yes. Which reminds me; we should probably go and find them." She finished.

Her friends started giggling.

"I didn't expect that." Louse laughed.

"So, it was kind of like a date, wasn't it? I knew it!" Morgan squealed.

"No it wasn't!" Lily replied indigently, "I told you, I don't like him. Maybe we could be friends, but I would _never _go out with him!"

Just then, Alex Rivers walked past their compartment and waved at Lily. She quickly waved back, blushing, and looked down at her hands. She was suddenly very hot.

"Ahh, I see now!" Morgan said smugly.

"Me too. Lily has the hots for a certain Mr Rivers!" Louise said matter-of-factly.

"Shut up, guys!" Lily said, checking the door to make sure no one was listening. Morgan and Louse were still laughing.

Lily grinned back at them, standing up.

"Come on, you two. Let's find those bloody Marauders."


	4. Chapter 4 - The Marauders

**Chapter Four**

Lily, Morgan and Louise searched the train for James and the Marauders. Several times they stopped to talk to other people they knew in Gryffindor. Louise stopped for at least five minutes talking to Victoria Green who played Quidditch for Gryffindor. Louise was a beater along with Sirius Black. Lily and Morgan have to endure Louise blabbering about how immature Sirius is at training every day. Victoria is very tall and athletic with bright blonde hair and brown eyes.  
Once Lily and Morgan dragged Louise away, they walked past the compartment Alex was sitting in. Louise and Morgan both waved over-cheerfully and chimed "_Hiiii Alex_" in their girly voices. Lily punched their arm playfully and kept pushing them down the carriage, whilst blushing quite a lot.

Finally, they found the Marauders sitting in a compartment at the opposite end of the train. Lily didn't really want to be the one to knock so she pleaded with Morgan to do it.

She clicked her tongue. "I don't think so. In you go." She pushed Lily forward. Lily knocked quietly on the door twice. All the boys were there; James, Remus, Sirius and Peter. James was sitting on the left, closest to the window with Peter opposite, Remus next to him and Sirius sitting next to Peter. James Potter was reading a book. Lily thought that was probably the most likely scene she would ever see. The Marauders never studied, with the exception of Remus.  
Remus had an old piece of parchment in is lap and was waving his wand over it. Lily couldn't see what was on it. Sirius and Peter were in an intense game of Wizard Chess, Peter losing badly.

They all stopped what they were doing and looked up when she knocked. James and Lily locked eyes. He smiled. She was about to smile back when Sirius' face appeared in front of her, grinning like a mad dog.

"Oh miss Evans, how lovely to see you. Who's this? Miss Reid and miss Taylor! Please come in!" he exclaimed, opening the sliding door and gesturing for them to enter.

"Shut up, Black." Lily said, smiling slightly.

Lily sat next to Sirius, now she was closest to the door. Morgan and Louise squished in next to Remus; Morgan nearest to the door and Louise right beside Remus. Louise and Remus looked at each other before quickly looking away, blushing furiously. They would make a good couple, Lily thought. She made eye contact with Louise and raised her eyebrows. Louise blushed a bit and shook her head.

Morgan was the first to speak. "Hey Remus, what was that thing you were holding?" She asked.

Remus glanced at Sirius and quickly said, "It was nothing – just a spare bit of parchment. I was bored but now you guys are here so yeah..." Morgan shrugged her shoulders in response.

"So what have you girlies been up to lately?" Sirius asked.

"We are not '_girlies_'." Morgan said. Sirius smirked.

"Not much." Lily replied, taking a book out of her bag, pulling knees up to her chest and opening up to the page she was last reading.

"Well, Morgan met up with her new boyfriend yesterday at Diagon Alley." Louise announced.

"Louise!" Morgan yelled, shoving her friend.

"Hey, how come I didn't know about this? I was there as well!" Lily said. Why wouldn't they tell her? Surely they would tell her if Morgan had a boyfriend.

"They didn't really meet until yesterday, actually. Besides, you were off having a date with James!" Great, did she have to say that?

"It was not a date!" Lily protested, blushing furiously. The two girls started laughing. Remus smiled to himself while James became suddenly very interested in his finger nails. Sirius sat there gaping at James.

"Hello! Earth to Prongs... Why didn't I hear about this? I'm only your best friend who happens to live with you!" He said, waving his hands in front of James' face.

"Sorry, Padfoot... It must've slipped my mind!" James said, trying to stop himself from laughing at Sirius face, but also blushing at the same time.

"Slipped your mind? Yeah, right..." he said, slumping back in his seat with his arms crossed.

"Anyway," Lily said, eager to steer the conversation away from her and James. "Who's this guy you met?" She asked Morgan.

"Well, you know that guy that plays Seeker for Hufflepuff... The guy we think is really hot?" Morgan said.

"Yeah..." Lily said. James' head snapped up. He wanted to know the name of this guy that apparently Lily thought was hot. He wanted to rip his head off, but remembered he's trying to keep on Lily's good side.

"It's him. He pretty much just came up to me and asked me out. I said yes, naturally, so yeah. He's taking me to the next Hogsmede weekend." She couldn't stop smiling.

"Right." Lily said. Everyone fell into silence; one of those long, awkward silences. They all started trying to think of something to say. Trust Sirius to break the ice.

"I'm glad you guys finally came. James was going crazy waiting for Evans o come." Sirius smirked. James kicked Sirius in the shin and glared at him. James hadn't said anything this whole time. If he was honest, he didn't trust himself to say anything productive. He didn't want to risk ruining anything with Lily. He noticed that almost everything he said annoyed her. Best to keep his mouth shut.  
Again, Lily tried to think of something to say that would distract everyone from the whole _James-is-crazy-about-Lily _Situation. "Does anyone know who Head Boy is? It's you, isn't it, Remus?" She asked, grinning at him.

He smiled and shook his head. "Not me, more like Prongs over here." He jerked his thumb towards James.

"You? I – well, that's really..." Lily didn't know what it was. Was she happy? It was a bit of an odd choice, she thought. James was good in class and won lots of points for Gryffindor in Quidditch but lost just as many for his stupid pranks and rule breaking.

"Yes, we think Dumbledore might finally be affected by old age." Sirius said, nodding his head.

"No, I didn't mean that. It's good, I suppose..." She said awkwardly.

James smiled at her. "Don't worry; I thought it was a mistake too. I owled Dumbledore telling him he sent the badge to the wrong person but he said I had... What was it, Padfoot? Great leadership skills and 'moral fibre.'"

"He's right. You'll be fine." Lily said, trying to cover up her awkwardness. Originally, she thought Sirius might be right. Maybe Dumbledore was crazy. But the more she thought about it, she saw how Dumbledore was thinking. He _is _a natural leader in Quidditch; he is a loyal friend (she had noticed over the years). She suddenly felt horrible about not noticing these things before. She only picked up on the negative things. Like how he was such a player with the girls and loved all the attention; how he loses so many points while doing stupid things with his friends.

"Okay, enough with the mushy cute stuff." Sirius said. James shook his head and pulled out his Head Boy badge and started fiddling with it. Lily went back to her book, trying to hide her red cheeks.

James and Lily were quiet the whole way to Hogwarts, pretending to be occupied while listening to everyone else's conversations. Louise and Sirius were talking about Quidditch when Lily remembered.

"Crap! James! We're supposed to meet the Prefects like, ten minutes ago!" She panicked, quickly shoving her book away while muttering "_Crap, crap, crap!" _under her breath. They said goodbye to the others and left.  
When they were out in the corridor, James trying to keep up with Lily's frantic speed walking, he caught her by the wrist and slowed her down.

"Lily, calm down! We'll make it." He said calmly.

Lily stopped and glared at him. "Head Boy may not mean anything to you, Potter. But Head Girl means a lot to me!" She snapped. She turned to storm off again but James still had hold of her wrist.

"That's not what I meant, Lily. Please listen to me." He said quietly. She stopped again and faced him. "Head Boy _does _mean a lot to me, thank you very much. I never thought I would get it but now that I've got it, I'm not giving up on it easily. The Prefects won't care if we're late. You're going to be a great Head Girl; no one deserved more than you do." He reassured her. 

Lily was slightly flattered and surprised. She breathed in and then out slowly. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine, let's go." James said, leading the way this time.

Eventually, they got there in time. It turns out most of the Prefect's got there late anyway. Lily explained about some of the privileges of being Prefects. She also talked about Hogsmede weekends. James told them about patrols. He explained about the signup sheet in the common rooms about Quidditch training. Lily was very surprised by James. She wasn't expecting him to just take charge like that. She thought he would sit back and she'd have to do all the work. But she didn't mind; she was exhausted and just wanted to get to Hogwarts already, in her nice warm bed. By the time they had finished, they were almost at Hogsmede station.

While they were walking down the corridor back to the others, James said, "Well done, Lily."

"Oh, thanks... You too." She replied quietly. She kept her head down and kept walking.  
Maybe she could be friends with this new James. It was be a bit difficult thought, because of the others. They believe that James and Lily are madly in love but just won't admit it. Fat chance, she thought. She would never like James in that way. She liked Alex, anyway; really liked him, for months now. Better not let James know though, she thought, that won't go down well.


	5. Chapter 5 - Head Boy & Girl

**Chapter Five**

Lily, Morgan, Louise, James, Remus, Sirius and Peter all walked up to the castle together. The Prefects were left in charge of ushering the other students up to the castle so Lily and James were free to stick with their friends. Lily had expected it to be very awkward sitting with the Marauders; like when you're trying to make conversation with someone you have nothing in common with. She was surprised to find that her friends and the Marauders got along pretty well. Everyone besides Lily of course, liked Quidditch. She didn't mind watching but you'd never get her on a broomstick. Not ever.  
The Marauders and co. entered the Great Hall along with everyone else. Sirius occasionally sent a rude hand gesture to a Slytherin or two. Lily was so glad to finally be back at her real home. She sniffed in the welcoming aroma of Hogwarts and smiled at the roof. Just enjoy the little things.  
James had discreetly been watching Lily the whole night. He watched as she was her quiet self, reading a book. He watched as she was rushing around like a crazy person, and he watched now, as she smiled to herself. He couldn't believe his luck. He actually got to hang around with Lily Evans. He expected her to go and sit with her friends but she followed him to the Gryffindor table and sat next to him.  
Lily looked around the Great all. All her teachers were there; her favourite Charms teacher and her least favourite Divination teacher. She sat next to James, accidently knocking elbows. Lily didn't take any notice but James stiffened. She looked down the Gryffindor table and saw some of her friends. Cecilia Edwards with the dark green eyes and purple hair was a Metamorphagus. She could change any feature of her face. Cecilia usually stayed with the purple hair and green eyes though. She was also in the Slug Club with Lily. Professor Slughorn just couldn't wait for a Metamorphagus to join his little club. Further down was Chelsea Slater. She was also one of the smartest in Gryffindor. Lily usually studied with her in the library.  
Lily then turned her attention to the rest of the Hall. Her eyes drifted over to the Ravenclaw table and found Alex Mason. He was sitting next to some of his friends. As though he sensed being watched, he looked up and locked eyes with Lily. She quickly smiled and looked away, her cheeks red. Now she felt someone watching _her_. She looked around the Hall and saw Severus' eyes on her. She flicked her hair and turned around again, scowling.

Dumbledore finally stood up. "Welcome to another year at Hogwarts! Congratulations to our new Prefects. Also to our new Head Boy and Head Girl; James Potter and Lily Evans." Everyone clapped politely.

"I hope everyone is ready for an exciting year. I have the usual announcements; Mr Filch would like me to inform you that there is to be no wondering around the castle after hours. The Forbidden Forest is closed to all students." Dumbledore's eyes lingered on the Marauders. Sirius snickered.

"After the feast, I would like the Prefects to escort the first-years to their dormitories. I would also like to ask if the Head Boy and Girl would be so kind as to join me in my office after dinner. Now for the Sorting!" he said, clasping his hands together.

The first-years lined up nervously. The Sorting was done in ten minutes, including the Sorting Hats song that informed every one of dark and difficult times ahead. Gryffindor gained their twelve new entrants and the fest started.  
The Marauders, Lily, Morgan and Louise all got stuck into their feast. Lily had never felt so tired in her life. She ate as much chicken, mashed potatoes and pork chops as she could. She felt heavy, stuffed with all this food. Lily remained quiet again. James did too. Lily was so happy to be here and James was thrilled he was even sitting this close to Lily. He could almost smell her. She smelt fresh, like fresh air after a rainy day. Remus, Sirius and the two girls talked like nothing was out of the ordinary, like they had been friends their whole life.  
They finished dinner and dessert and waited for Dumbledore to dismiss them. Lily saw all the Prefects rushing towards the first-years and everyone started piling out of the Great Hall. Lily and James just made it out of the entrance Hall when a cold voice rang out behind them.

"So, Potter, you got what you wanted after all. What cock and bull story did you spin to make Dumbledore convinced you're Head Boy material?" Lucius Malfoy was standing there, flanked by Snape and McNair.

"Shut it, Malfoy. He deserved it more than you do. You're just jealous!" Lily snapped back. She was sick of Malfoy. This year he wasn't going to get the better of her.

"Standing up for your boyfriend, Evans? I didn't think you liked mudbloods, Potter?" He snarled. Severus' eyes darkened, boring through Lily. There was a loud bang and Malfoy, Snape and McNair crumpled to the ground.

Standing behind them was Sirius, wand raised and an evil grin on his face. "Sorry, it was just too tempting." He said, grinning at them. James grinned back, shaking his head.

"Good one, mate." He said, clapping Sirius on the back.

"Did you really have to curse them?" Lily said in a frustrated voice.

"Yes, Lily dear, when you finally realise how much of a slimy git Snivellus is, you'll appreciate my wonderful wand skills." He said, pleased with himself.

"You think I don't know? The Slytherin's call me a mudblood every day! Do you see me hexing them every chance I get?" Lily spat at Sirius. He threw his hands up and looked at James.

"Hey! Don't look at me, I didn't do anything." He said innocently

"You encouraged him." Lily answered. "Come on, Potter, we have to see Dumbledore."

James and Lily set off. Lily was wrong. He was Justas immature as before. Maybe she'll just have to settle with the idea that they are too different and will never be friends. She sighed sadly and kept walking. She hoped that wasn't the case.  
Great, James thought, it's back to 'Potter' now, all the thanks to Sirius. He already explained that he wasn't going to be hexing people unless absolutely necessary. He thought he finally convinced Sirius it was pointless... Apparently not.

Lily and James arrived outside the stone gargoyle.

"Do you know what the password is?" She asked, looking sideways at James.

Surprisingly, he nodded. "Acid Pops." The gargoyle jumped aside and Lily and James climbed the steps ascending to Dumbledore's office.

James and Lily had both been there before for several different reasons but that never made it any less amazing. The arrangements shined like silver and the portraits never failed to impress Lily. Dumbledore was sitting at his desk when they entered. He smiled at them and gestured for them to sit.  
Lily and James took the chairs opposite Dumbledore.

"Good evening." Dumbledore said, his eye twinkling.

"Good evening, sir." James and Lily said in unison.

"I'm sure you were surprised I awarded Mr Potter with the Head Boy badge, Miss Evans." He said to Lily. She nodded. James looked downed at his knees.

Dumbledore chuckled. "Yes, he was quite surprised himself. While Mr Lupin is suitable for the position as well, James has certain, ah, qualities I am interested in." He informed Lily. She nodded again. It was true.

Dumbledore went on. "You both know your role as Head Boy and Girl, correct?"

"Yes sir." They replied.

"Now, you are required to use the Heads dormitory. Naturally, you'll have your own personal sleeping quarters and bathroom. For studying, you will share the Heads common room." They nodded again. Lily wasn't sure about having to spend so much time with James. But maybe, just maybe, he'll be different when his friends aren't around.  
James, on the other hand, was thrilled. He finally had a chance to show Lily he wasn't all that bad. Mayne they could be friends... Maybe they could be more, James thought.

"Do you know where the Heads Dorm is?" Dumbledore asked them. Lily shook her head but James nodded.

"Don't worry; I can show Lily, sir." James said.

"Oh, I'm sure you will." Dumbledore chuckled. James' cheeks reddened.

"Well, you're in good hands, Miss Evans." He dismissed them. Lily rolled her eyes and followed James out.

"Good night, sir." Lily called over her shoulder.

She followed James, half a pace behind. She had no idea where they were going and it was eerily quiet. She decided to as James what she had been thinking.

"How do you know where the Heads Dorm is?"

He turned and smiled at her. "I read it in a book. Have you ever heard of Balthazar Stevens?" He asked Lily.

"Yes. I've never read any of his books, though."

"He wrote a book about Hogwarts. It's kind of like _Hogwarts: A History _but more interesting. It's got every single detail of Hogwarts in there, including the Heads Dorm."

"Sounds good," Lily said absent-mindedly.

James nodded and led Lily around the corner. He stopped in front of a portrait of an old man wearing deep purple dress robes.

"So," the portrait said slowly, "you are the new Head Boy and Girl?" He eyed them curiously.

"Yes." Lily said. She had no idea what to do now. Did the portrait just open or was there a password? She turned to James for answers.

"Is there a password or something?" She asked uncertainly.

"Yep, we get to choose what it is? So, what's it going to be?" He asked Lily.

She raised her eyebrows. "I don't know!"

"We need something that Sirius won't know. He likes to wake me up in the morning by spurting water on me. He calls it 'freshening me up'." James says miserably. Lily couldn't help but laugh. She could imagine that perfectly. James grinned at her.

"What about... Something about Sirius?" Lily suggested.

"Sure. Something really ridiculous!" James said, grinning mischievously.

"What's Sirius' least favourite teacher?"

"Uh, probably... Slughorn." James thought.

Lily turned to the portrait. "The new password is; Sirius snogs Slughorn."

James snorted and pulled Lily into a one-armed hug. He quickly realised what he was doing and let go. Lily only just reached the bottom of his chin. She had to admit, the brief hug was actually pretty good. She had never noticed how muscly he was.

"If you wish," said the old man tiredly, swinging open for them.

Lily and James stepped in. It was bigger than Lily expected. The common room was painted in Gryffindor colours and reminded her of the Gryffindor common room. It was large and round. To the left, near the window, were two desks against one another. There was a warm, crackling fire on the right with two armchairs and a couch facing it. Opposite Lily and James were two doors marked with their names. Lily's was on the left and James' on the right. They walked over to the doors, looked at each other one last time, and entered.

Lily's room looked much like hers at home; painted in light shades of purple and blue. There was a large double bed with a flower doona cover. A bedside table sat on either side. There was also another desk, a chest of drawers and wardrobe in the far corner. Also, in the other corner, a door that read _Bathroom_. It was rather large and very white.  
She flopped onto her bed and look up at the roof. She almost fell asleep then and there. All her things as been delivered already, she finished all her holiday homework. There was nothing to do. She got up, walked out of her room and saw James sitting in the arm chair by the fire, reading a book. She sat in the chair opposite him.

James looked up. "Hey." He said plainly.

"Hey. Is it just me or does your room look the same as your room at home?" She asked.

"Yeah, mine is pretty similar. My bathroom is sick as. What about yours?"

"Mine is great too." They sat in silence; a comfortable silence. Lily sat peacefully, looking into the fire. She wasn't thinking about anything in particular. Meanwhile, James' mind was going haywire. He really wanted to ask Lily what he has been thinking all day, but couldn't make himself say it. He summoned up his courage and blurted out her name.

"Lily?"

She looked up in surprise. "Yes?"

"I – um, are we... you know, friends?" He asked, looking at his feet.

Lily considered this. They hadn't had a massive argument yet, which surprised her. She also found herself quite enjoying the company of the Marauders. So yeah, maybe they were friends...

"Well, yeah... I think so. You've changed – in a good way." She added quickly.

James almost jumped with joy but kept his face straight. His stomach was doing backflips. He can't believe she actually noticed his change. But he had to remind himself to just slow down.

"That means a lot. I kind of had an epiphany, I guess, over the holidays. I know I used to be a jerk. I've wanted to say sorry since I saw you in Diagon Alley but I didn't know how. But being friends is good enough for me." He told her.

Lily couldn't believe her ears. James Potter admitted he was a jerk. James Potter apologized. Luckily for him, she wasn't one to hold grudges.

"You're not the only one who should apologize. I was awful as well. And of course we can be friends!" Lily couldn't help but blush.

"Thanks, Lils." He stood up. "I better go to bed, I'm exhausted."

Lily stood too. "Same." They walked over to their doors and face each other. They both wanted to say something but couldn't figure out what it was exactly.

James held out his hand to shake. "Friends? And we'll both make an effort not be jerks?"

Lily laughed and nodded. In her mind, she was just going to shake his hand, but her body did otherwise.  
She stepped closer and hugged him. She wasn't sure why, exactly, or what made her do it. No one had been this nice to her in a long time. Well, sure her parents were, and so were her friends, but James was different.  
James hugged her back. He suddenly felt very protective towards her. He didn't want anyone to hurt her, ever. She felt so small in his arms. He didn't want anyone else to touch her. He was going to keep her safe.

They finally broke apart. "Good night, Lils."

"Good night, James." Her stomach fluttered and her heart raced as she closed her door behind her.


	6. Chapter 6 - First day back

**Chapter Six**

Lily was awoken from her dream by the sun streaming through the window. Her dream was slowly slipping away. It wasn't happy, she remembered. It was a nightmare of sorts. The dream was a mix between James and Alex. She would be having a moment with Alex or talking to him and then he would turn into James. He was invading her life, her friends, and now her dreams. She was suddenly angry at him. She knew it was stupid; it wasn't his fault he popped up in her dream. The change from them being enemies to friends was so sudden that Lily felt vulnerable.  
She got up slowly, still in her singlet and shorts. Lily slumped out of her room and onto the couch, not noticing that James was watching her weirdly.  
It was about seven in the morning and James had already been awake for about ten minutes.

"Um, good morning..." James said uncertainly.

Lily jumped. "Hi," she said shortly.

James was a bit freaked out. She was acting stranger and stranger. It looked like she was hung over or something... They remained in silence. Lily was lying on her back, staring at the rood. She has one hand above her head and the other on her stomach that as heaving up and down slowly. James kept casting her worried looks.

He finally decided to speak up. "Lily? Is something wrong?" He asked her gently.

"Yes, James. Something is very wrong." She said sharply. Nothing was wrong, really. She knew she was being overly emotional.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked as kindly as he could but she didn't seem to want to talk to him.

"Hardly," she snapped. Lily let out a frustrated groan and sat up, slumping low on the couch, her long legs stretched out in front of her.  
James couldn't help but notice her legs. He always knew she was gorgeous but bloody hell... All he wanted was her to like him as much as he liked her. Maybe one day, James thought. He sensed it was probably time to leave and let her think in peace. He got up and left.

Trust him to leave when the going gets tough, Lily thought bitterly. She hung her head over the back of the couch. What was wrong with her? It was just a dream. She needed to talk to Morgan and Louise, surely they could help. She got dressed and made her way through the castle.  
When she entered the Great Hall her friends were there as she suspected. Lily walked over haughtily and sat down. Morgan and Louise took one look at her face and knew something was up.

"Spill, was it Potter? Damn, you guys were going so well!" Morgan sighed.

"Well... Yes and no." Lily replied.

"Care to share?" Louise asked.

Lily told them. She told them about the dream and tried to explain why she was so upset by it, but she couldn't put a finger on it. "Then he just got up left." She finished.

"To be honest... Now, don't kill me when I say this, Lil," Louise started cautiously, raising her hands, "I think you like him. James, I mean."

Normally, Lily would have flat out denied Louise's statement. She would've gone on a rant about how much she hates James and how she would _never _like him... But she didn't have the energy. "I don't know. I really don't think so. It's nothing compared to what I feel when I'm around Alex."

Someone appeared behind them. Sirius. "Oooh, who's this Alex you speak of? Prongs won't be happy. Where is he, anyway?"

"None of your business, Black. I think he's still in the Head's dorm. Good luck getting in there, though." She said, smirking at the memory. Her stomach lurched and she stuffed toast in her mouth to shut it up. Sirius turned and left.

"Maybe you just tell Alex you like him. Get it over and done with." Morgan suggested.

It was a good idea. After all, it was on her list of things to do this year. Her stomach bubbled nervously thinking of what she'd say to Alex. Maybe she'd try and catch up with him after Divination.  
Lily and her friends went off to their first class; Defence Against the Dark Arts with the Slytherin's. Although she was good at it, she has no love for Defence Against the Dark Arts. Potter was there of course but Lily ignored him. Next they had Herbology with the Hufflepuff's. Morgan went straight to her boyfriend, William, and started kissing him. Louise and Lily rolled their eyes and pushed past them. They did nothing interesting in Herbology, just drawing labelled diagrams of fire-breathing plants. After Herbology was Arithmacy. None of her friends took the subject so she was on her own, which suited her very much. Arithmacy finished and she met her friends out in the grounds.

"Care of Magical Creatures was a complete bore!" Louise complained.

"I don't know why you bothered continuing with it." Lily said.

"Me neither," Louise replied.

After their break was Divination. No matter how determined Lily was to talk to Alex, she found herself dreading it. What was she going to say? What if he rejected her? What if she was imagining the feelings that were between them?  
It wasn't cold but it wasn't warm either and Lily and her friends were sitting underneath a tree near the lake. They were talking about Morgan and William when Alex came up behind them.

"Hey Lily," he said casually, leaning against the tree looking down at her.

"Oh, hi Alex," she said shyly.

"How are you?" He sat down next to her. Morgan and Louise grinned at each other before jumping up and saying, "We're just going inside for a while." Lily made a mental note to kill them later.

"I'm fantastic. Are you trying out for the Quidditch team this year?" She asked, trying to make conversation.

Alex raised an eyebrow in surprise. "I didn't know you were interested in Quidditch."

Lily smiled guiltily. "I'm not. I don't really get that big deal is about."

"I can teach you." He said, grinning.

Lily laughed. "I don't think so. You'll never get me on a broomstick."

"I can try." He winked. The butterflies nesting in Lily's stomach started going crazy. This was the first actual good flirtatious conversation they had ever had. He was nicer than any guy she knew and funny too. He was perfect. Lily laughed, tipping her head back.

While Lily was having the time of her, James was further up the hill glaring at the Alex guy who was sitting a little too close to Lily. His insides were churning and he was using all of his willpower to stop himself from standing up, storming down there and throwing the git in the Black Lake.

"So when's the next Hogsmede trip, Miss Head Girl?" Alex asked Lily. She pushed him playfully.

"I don't know yet. Potter and I have to talk about it." She said, scowling.

"Well, I was thinking, only if you want," he began hesitantly, "we could go together?"

Lily was taken aback for a moment. She wasn't expecting him to ask so quickly.  
"Ah – yes, sure. I mean, I would love to!" She answered, blushing madly and smiling. Alex put his arm around her shoulders and said, "Great!"

James couldn't take it anymore. He jumped up and stormed down to Lily, ignoring Sirius calling after him. He put on a fake cherry voice. "Hi, Lily! Oh, hello Alex!" He said, as though he had just been casually strolling past and noticed them.

Lily and Alex broke apart. She looked up and saw James striding towards them. She scowled again. What was he doing? "Hello, Potter." She said stiffly.

"Hi," said Alex. He looked just as pissed off as Lily felt.

"How are you both?" James asked cheerfully.

Alex was about to answer but Lily cut him off. "What do you want, Potter?" She snarled.

"Well, if you're going to be snappy," he said, dropping his act. "I need to talk to you about Hogsmede and our rounds tonight. The Prefects have already filled in the slots they want."

Lily scowled darkly to herself. Who does he think he is, waltzing down here and demanding my time? She thought to herself. But duties were duties. She got up. "Fine," She mumbled to James. "I'm so sorry, Alex. I'll see you later, alright?" She smiled at him and then stormed off. Potter would have to catch up himself.

Once they were inside the castle and no one was around, Lily spun around and faced James. "What – is – your – problem?" She yelled, emphasising each word.

"What? Isn't it obvious?"

"No. Would you care to enlighten me on your crazy theory?" She snapped.

"The only reason he's interested in you is because you're gorgeous and he wanted to get in your pants!" James yelled back, his eyes darkening.

Lily could've slapped him. "So you're saying that's that only likeable thing about me?" In the back of her mind she registered that he'd just called her gorgeous, but she elected to ignore it.

James was about to answer when Professor McGonagall came rushing around the corner. "Mr Potter, Miss Evans! What is all this shouting about? You two are Head Girl and Boy! I am very disappointed." She said sharply.

Lily hung her head and apologized.

"That's better. Please return to the Heads common room _quietly_." McGonagall instructed. Once she was gone and around the corner, Lily turned to James.

"Good one, genius." She said, tears welling in her eyes. She turned around and started running to the Heads dorm before James could see her cry.

"Lily!" He called out but she didn't stop. James ran after her but she was already in her room when he got there.  
Lily was so angry, infuriated. Now she definitely had a reason to be pissed off with him... the stupid prat. He invades her life, her dreams, her friends, and now her "love life". Then he goes and says all that stuff about Alex. The boy had nerve...

James waited all day and almost half of the night for Lily to come out. He'd lost his cool and blown his luck. He should of just backed off. Of course she was allowed to see other guys, she wasn't his, no matter how much James hated it. It was natural for him to be jealous, he thought. He was crazy about her.  
It was about ten-thirty by the time Lily came out of her bedroom. Her eyes were blotchy and her head was pounding. She knew she must look completely awful. James jumped up as soon as she opened the door. She looked up at him and then down at her feet. He could see she had been crying and his insides twisted.

"Lily, I'm sorry. I –," he began.

"Forget it, James. Let's just get the round over and done with." She said, walking towards the door. He stopped her.

"I was totally out of line. It's not my place to tell you any of that. It's just... I hear and see more than you think." He insisted.

She didn't respond. She wasn't in the mood to reason right now. Holding grudges wasn't her think but he'd managed to piss her of pretty bad. "Come on, we have patrolling to do."


	7. Chapter 7 - Secrets out, Secrets pay

**Chapter Seven**

Nothing exciting happened to James and Lily on their rounds last night. They walked around in silence until ten o'clock, each to their own thoughts. They only found one person out of bed; Sirius, snogging in a broom cupboard with an extremely clumsy blonde. Or maybe that's because she had just been kissing Sirius. Lily scowled and kept walking, leaving James to deal with Sirius.  
Lily had been doing that a lot lately; scowling. She just wasn't happy. The mood around the castle was dim anyway, with You-Know-Who killing more often. Everyone knew he was out there but he was becoming bolder, not bothering to hide the fact the he was on the move. Lily found it hard to smile these days. Only one person could make her happy; Alex. She has been finding more and more excuses to spend time with him; in the library, at lunch breaks, watching his Quidditch practise.  
Monday night, Lily and James stuck up the notice for Hogsmede: Saturday. Lily still wasn't back on speaking terms with James, which proved hard to maintain seeing as they lived five meters away from each other. Luckily for Lily, Quidditch had started and the Gryffindor VS Slytherin game was looming closer and James had scheduled Quidditch practise four times a week.

Today was Friday, the day before Hogsmede. James knew this was his last chance. Although he knew they were very slim, he was going to ask her differently this time... Not like all the other times. Lily was studying Transfiguration when James entered the common room.

"Hey," he said casually.

Lily didn't bother to answer. She was concentrating.

"What are you studying?" He asked.

"Transfiguration," she said shortly.

"Do you want some help?" He knew it was the wrong thing to say just as it came out of his mouth. Wrong, so wrong...

"I'm quite fine, Potter," she snapped. "Just because you're a genius at Transfiguration doesn't mean we all suck."

"Well of course you don't." James said, trying to sound positive and unaffected by her comment.

Lily ignored him and kept working.

What is this girl's deal? James thought to himself. First she seems okay with him, and then she wants his head on a plate. She's a rollercoaster. She doesn't know what she wants. She wasn't like that at the start of the year.

She's going to say no anyway, James thought, may as well just ask. "Lily? Do you want to go to Hogsmede with me tomorrow? Louise and Morgan are coming. So are Padfoot and Moony." He asked hopefully. He asked nicely. Maybe she'd come if she knows were coming too.

Lily thought he was nuts. Did he really expect her to say yes? "No thanks, I'm going with someone else." She said indifferently, still not lifting her head.

"Who?" James tried to ask casually. He already knew the answer and he probably wasn't going to like it.

Lily couldn't turn back now. She couldn't lie and say she was going with Morgan and Louise; they were already going with the Marauders. She knew James wouldn't like the answer.

"I'm going with Alex." She said boldly. Stuff him; she could go with whoever she wanted to.

James stiffened. He knew that would be the answer but that didn't ease his anger. "Alex? Did you even hear what I said last week? Don't come running to me if he hurts you, because I won't hear a word of it!" He shouted at Lily. He wasn't just making stupid accusations; he had proof. He'd heard stories, seen things too. Now Lily was his victim and James wasn't going to let him hurt Lily.

"Fine! I won't come running to you because I won't need to! You're the last person I would come to for help, anyway! Leave me alone." She yelled back, picking up her book and storming into her room.

James sighed. He needed a plan. He needed Sirius.

It was Saturday morning and Lily was getting changed for Hogsmede. Alex was going to meet her after breakfast. She dressed into light wash skinny jeans and a dark blue fitted long-sleeve top. She knew James would be in the Heads common room. To be honest, she was quite nervous about her date and facing James. She held her head high and walked out of her room, expecting to be confronted by James. He didn't even look up. He was bent over a piece of parchment, waving his wand. It looked vaguely familiar. She recognised it as the same on Remus has on the train. She wondered why they would need such an old piece of parchment but she was in no mood to ask. She kept walking and left the common room.  
She sat at breakfast and ate quietly. Her friends sensed she was upset but knew not to ask. Lily continued eating, thinking about all the ways her date could go wrong. Her mood lightened when she got up and saw Alex waiting for her outside the Great Hall. She grinned and walked over to him.

"Are you ready?" Alex asked, holding out his hand.

Lily took it. "Yep, let's go."

They walked out of the entrance of Hogwarts, passed the grounds and onto the path leading to Hogsmede.

"You look beautiful, by the way." Alex told her as they were walking.

Lily blushed. "Thank you. You don't look so bad yourself."

"Thanks." He squeezed her hand.

All the other students were walking as well. Lily could see some people she knew in front of her, walking with their friends and boyfriends. She looked at the people behind her. Lily's eyes found the Marauders straight away. They were with Morgan and Louise, laughing a something Sirius had sad. Lily remembered Morgan has said something about meeting her boyfriend William. Why was she was the Marauders?

Alex had been watching. "You can go with them if you want to." He didn't sound hurt.

"No, it's okay. I want to stay with you." She did want to stay with Alex but she envied her friends. They were happy. They didn't seem to be affected by the gloom that was settling lower over Lily. Between Head Girl duties and homework, she hardly had time to sleep. She felt so far away from her friends. They never spent time together anymore.

Lily and Alex stopped in the main street of Hogsmede.

"Where should we go?" Alex asked.

She tried to think of a place that would least likely contain James. He would probably go to Zonko's or Honey Jukes with the others.

"The Three Broomsticks?" She suggested.

Alex nodded and lead her to the Three Broomsticks, still holding her hand. They chose a table in the far corner and ordered two butterbeer's. Before Madam Rosmerta could return with their drinks, the door tinkled and the Marauders entered along with Louise and Morgan. Lily groaned and banged her head on the table. Morgan looked around, saw Lily, and bee-lined for her. "Great." Lily mumbled. Alex put his hand on hers, calming her down. The others saw where Morgan was going and followed. James hesitated before following.

"Hey Lily!" Morgan said cheerfully.

"Hi. I thought you were meeting William?" She asked curiously.

"William? We broke up last week? Didn't I tell you?" Morgan said, looking confused.

Lily shook her head. James was standing with his arms crossed, having a stare-off with Alex. They looked about ready to curse each other. Lily stood suddenly and took Alex's hand.

"Come on, Alex. Let's go somewhere else. You guys can have our drinks." She told them. All she wanted to do was get away from James.

"Sorry about that. But as you might have noticed, Potter and I don't get along well." She said.

"That's alright. I don't think he likes me, anyway." He smirked. Lily laughed.

Alex pulled her into a hug. She looked up at him and she almost chocked on her breath. He was gorgeous. He leant down closer to Lily's face. She could feel his breath on her face. He kissed her nose and her skin tingled. Lily stood on her toes, getting closer to him. He kissed her lips and she kissed back. It was soft and tender at first, but the longer they kissed, the more intense it got. Finally, they broke apart.

Alex grinned. "Come with me."

He pulled her down the road and left down another street, away from other students. Lily felt wild and excited, freer than she had ever been before. She had no idea where they were going but that just increased the fun.  
Lily had no idea that James and Sirius had been watching. James knew Alex would do something like this. He knew Alex wasn't your average Ravenclaw. James had seen him talking with Slytherin's, the worst kind of Slytherin's. This is what he did; seduced the women that the Slytherin's needed to get back at for whatever reason.  
So when Alex kissed Lily, Sirius had to hold him back. James wanted to rip the guy's throat out. He so wished it was him holding Lily, him kissing her. He could give her the world.  
Sirius and James had the Invisibility Cloak covering them. Sirius wanted to know why we couldn't just prank them while they were out together but James knew that wasn't the way to go. Even if James was right, Lily would still blame everything on him.

Alex and Lily zipped around another corner with Sirius and James running along, trying to keep up. They turned a corner and could no longer see them. Did they keep running or did the enter one of the houses?

"Split up?" Sirius suggested.

James nodded. "But what if we can't find her? What will he do to her, Padfoot?" He asked Sirius anxiously, unable to gather his thoughts properly.

"Prongs," Sirius said, putting a hand on his friends shoulder, "We're the Marauders. We have the map of Hogsmede too, remember?" Two years ago, the Marauders made a map of Hogwarts, showing every secret passage way, every hidden classroom and staircase, and every single person in the castle at all times. Now, in their last year, they had just finished a map of Hogsmede.

Sirius whipped it out and said the words. Instantly, a map of Hogsmede appeared. James quickly scanned every inch of the paper.

"There!" He almost shouted, pointing at two dots in the next street, labelled Lily and Alex. Three other dots joined them, labelled Lucius Malfoy, Bellatrix Black and Walden McNair.

"Padfoot, we have to move." James started running towards Lily's dot with Sirius running a stride behind him.

"What's my dear old cousin doing there?" Sirius growled as they rounded another corner. They were one street away.

Meanwhile, Lily was bound in ropes, Malfoy and his gang advancing. Lily struggled to get out of the bonds but every time she moved, they tightened. She could hardly breathe, her ribcage surely about to be crushed.

"Should I play with her a bit first or get it over and done with?" Malfoy drawled.

They're going to kill me, Lily thought to herself. She tried not to show fear. She had to be strong. She thought about screaming, to see if anyone might hear her. Just as she thought that, Lily was released from the ropes and fell to the ground, gasping for air. A curse hit her. This time she couldn't stop herself. She screamed a terrible scream. Her insides were being ripped apart. She looked down and saw blood spurting out of her. Her head was splitting open. She didn't even hear Malfoy mutter the curse so she had no idea was it was. The pain was too much.

"Must thank Snape for that one." She heard someone say.

Snape? She was so confused. She couldn't see. Her consciousness was slipping away. She thought she heard someone call, "Lily!" But she couldn't be sure. And in what she thought was her last dying moment, she thought of James, and whispered his name. Her head crashed to the ground and she blacked out.


	8. Chapter 8 - Confrontations

**Chapter Eight**

When Lily came round she tried to sit up but discovered she couldn't. It hurt too much. She felt someone move next to her. She tried to remember what happened before she woke up here... She didn't exactly know where _here_ was. She was laying on something soft. A bed? Lily opened her eyes. Her vision was blurred but cleared eventually. She was in the hospital wing. Again, she tried to sit up, a little more successful this time. No one was here with her but there were a bunch of flowers and chocolates at the end of her bed. She wondered who they were from.  
Madam Pomfrey came rushing over. "Don't try and sit up, dear. Here, drink this." She handed Lily a bottle of thick potion. Lily drank up, eager for some sort of relief. As the icy cold potion slide into her stomach, her headache eased and the sharp, stabbing pain in her bones went away.

"What happened to me?" Lily panicked. She couldn't remember anything.

"Hit with a terrible curse... A terrible dark curse. I healed most of the scarring but I'm afraid you will be stuck with the faint lines on your stomach." Madam Pomfrey said sadly.

Lily quickly ripped the covers off and yanked up her shirt. On her stomach were four light pink slashes. It looked like she had been ripped open with a knife. "Who did this to me?" Lily asked quietly.

"I'm afraid I don't know much more than you do., besides the fact that Mr Potter carried you in here and refused to leave –," she began.

"Wait – James Potter?" Lily asked. She couldn't believe it. James was the one that saved her?

"The very same," Madam Pomfrey nodded. "He refused to leave and only left when I went to get the Headmaster."

About one-hundred questions were boiling up inside her. "How long have I been here?" Lily asked. She looked outside. The sun was low in the sky, probably late-afternoon she figured.

"All night and most of today. I'm sorry, dear, but I'm going to have to keep you in here tonight as well." She gave Lily a sad smile and a pat on the shoulder. "Classes will be over soon. I'm sure your friends will hear you're in here soon enough." She walked back to her office.  
True to her word, Madam Pomfrey allowed her friends to see her about twenty minutes later. Louise and Morgan came running in, books still in their hands, and their cheeks as white as paper.

"Lily, what happened?" Morgan screeched.

"Are you okay?" Louise squealed.

"Yeah, I'm fine now. I don't know what happened – I can't remember a thing." Lily said quietly. She was ashamed of herself. How did she get in such a stupid situation? Seven years at Hogwarts and she had never been to the Hospital Wing until now. She was disappointed she couldn't remember what happened. She only knew one thing: James was involved.

"Where's James?" She blurted out. The girls looked confused.

"Why?" Louise asked.

"Madam Pomfrey said he carried me in here." Lily told them.

"I'll go and get him right now." Morgan said quickly, getting up from beside Lily and rushing out.  
Louise held Lily's hand and sat with her until James returned. When he came striding in, Louise moved aside for him. James took Lily's hand, which surprised her, but she didn't reject it.

"I thought – oh God. I don't know what I thought." He said shakily. Lily noticed his eyes looked a bit wetter than usual.

"Don't worry; I'm fine." She said gently. James put his head on the bed next to her hand.

"We'll come back soon, okay Lils?" Morgan said, dragging Louise away with her. Lily nodded.  
James and Lily sat there in the same position for a while, for so long James could have been asleep for all she knew.

Lily breathed shakily. "What happened to me?"

James looked up. "You went to Hogsmede with Alex –," Lily stiffened. He didn't have to say any more. It all came rushing back to her like a lightning bolt. Going to Hogsmede... Kissing Alex... Running with him... Alex bounding her in ropes... Slytherin's appearing... Falling unconscious. She started trembling.

"Are you okay?" James asked.

"Yeah, I just remembered everything..." She said, hanging her head. James put his head back down as well. They were still holding hands. Lily realised she was warned about this... By James. Again, she felt so awful for being too arrogant to listen to him.

"James, I'm so sorry. I should have listened to you. I'm such an idiot." Lily said, trying not to cry.

James rubbed her hand with his thumb. "It's okay; it's not your fault. That guy is a jerk." He said darkly.

"But I should have listened to you!" She cried, a tear spilling down her cheek.

"That doesn't matter. You're okay so I'm happy." He told her. Lily squeezed his hand gratefully and James smiled. It was dark now and all the students were probably at dinner. Lily's stomach rumbled as she thought of food.

James chuckled. "I'll get you something to eat. I'll be back in a second." He stood up and strode out of the Hospital Wing. Lily was a bit taken aback but didn't say anything. She was starving. James returned soon after, carrying an armful of food. Lily stared at him.

"Where did you get all that? You didn't just walk into the Great Hall and take it, did you?" She laughed.

"Nope," James grinned, "I went to the kitchens." He was somewhat proud of himself, puffing out his chest. He had brought her favourite; sausages and roast potatoes.

"How did you guess?" She asked, smirking. He shrugged modestly and winked at her. He brought some for himself as well so they sat down and ate together.

"You can go to the Great Hall if you want, I don't mind." She told him. Okay, maybe she did mind... She didn't feel safe anymore. James' presence comforted her.

"No, I want to stay." He said, not quite looking her in the eye. Lily smiled to herself. She really didn't deserve James... friendship? She was horrible, and he was far too nice to her.

They sat, eating in silence. Lily sat back in her bed, stuffed like a pig. They sat for a while, until it started to get awkward. Lily wondered if he'd stay with her tonight. She dismissed the thought. She didn't know what the answer would be. She couldn't possibly ask him to stay here all night in that uncomfortable chair. On the other hand, she didn't think she could sleep without him here. Madam Pomfrey wouldn't let him anyway...

"Well – ah, I'll let you sleep... See you tomorrow. I'll come straight back." James said awkwardly. He didn't want to leave, but he knew Lily probably didn't want him to stay.

Lily's arm shot out instinctively and grabbed his arm. "Please stay."

How am I supposed to resist that? James thought. He sat back down again. Lily still hadn't let go of his arm. She was cold and shaking, which James realised. He pulled the covers up higher and captured both her hands in his, warming them.  
Lily turned on her side to face him. She smiled and whispered, "Thank you for saving me."

James grinned. "Always a pleasure."

"Good night, James."

"Good night, Lily."

She closed her eyes and fell asleep in the next two minutes. After yesterday, she felt no one could harm her as long as she was with James.  
James waited until she was deeply asleep. He looked around and noticed Madam Pomfrey had gone to bed, forgetting he was there. He kissed Lily's forehead and closes his eyes, falling asleep as well. Maybe there was hope. All he had to do was keep saving her life and he would be rolling.


	9. Chapter 9 - Recovery

**Chapter Nine**

Lily was finally released from the Hospital Wing at eight in the morning. She and James were woken by Madam Pomfrey. She had woken to find James asleep at Lily's side and went on a rant about how Lily needed to recover and rest. James turned on the good old 'Potter Charm' and she left them to it. Lily and James left, his arm around her shoulders. Lily was still a little sore and tender but she was alright to walk. They hadn't talked about what happened two days ago or how they were acting like they were together... But Lily didn't mind. She didn't know what she was doing but she felt she had to be close to James.  
When Lily and James entered the Great Hall, Lily under his arms, everyone stopped talking. Lily blushed and kept walking with James to the Gryffindor table. James grinned as Sirius stared dumbfounded at the both of them and mouthed, "What did you do to here?" James just grinned wider. Louise and Morgan beamed at them. Suddenly the Great Hall broke into whispered conversations. It seemed to others it was big news that Lily and James were talking, let alone being in physical contact with each other.

Breakfast started and everyone put James and Lily aside. Lily ate bacon and two pieces of toast. She tried to stop herself from laughing as she watched Sirius shovel food into his mouth. James hadn't seen Lily laugh in a long time. It was refreshing.  
After breakfast, Dumbledore stood up. "Could the Head Girl and Boy please come to my office?"

Lily looked worried. "It's okay; he probably just wants to talk about what happened at Hogsmede." James said quickly, getting up with everyone else.

He took her hand and they walked out of the Great Hall, being watched like a hawk by Severus Snape. Lily and James walked through the busy crowd of students and arrived at Dumbledore's office two seconds after he did himself. They followed Dumbledore up the stairs and into his office. They sat in the same chairs as the last time they'd been here.

"I suppose you know why you are here." He said gravely. Lily noticed the twinkle in his eyes had faded and he looked much older than Lily had ever seen him.

They nodded.

"I need you to tell me exactly what happened." He instructed.

Lily told him everything from the beginning, even though she blushed when explaining the part about how Alex kissed her. She told him about how they ran off through the streets together, and how Alex bounded her, and how the Slytherin's showed up. She tried to explain the curse Malfoy used on her but her voice cracked.

Dumbledore nodded and propped his elbows up on the table and turned to James. "Now your account, Mr Potter."

James told him how Sirius and he had planned to keep an eye on Lily anyway. He explained the things he'd heard and seen about Alex. He told Dumbledore how they slipped under James' cloak and followed Lily and Alex through the streets of Hogwarts. Although they got their a bit late, they stunned the Slytherin's and Alex. Sirius tied them up while James carried Lily up to the Hospital Wing. It pained him to remember Lily's unconscious body in his arms, soaking with blood.  
Lily was in total awe of James. She couldn't believe he had carried her all the way to the castle. She reached across and held James' hand. Dumbledore smiled.

"You may leave now, thank you." He said kindly.

James and Lily moved towards the door. James turned back. "Sir?" he said.

"Yes, Mr Potter?" Dumbledore answered.

"Will be there by any punishment for the Slytherin's and Alex?" He asked.

Dumbledore chuckled. "I'm sure I'll think of something."

Lily and James walked back to the Heads dorm to get their books for class. They were already late for Transfiguration. Once they said the password and walked inside, James and Lily turned to each other. Although they hadn't talked about it, Lily had feelings for James. She couldn't help it. It just happened. James knew they weren't officially together but he felt it was his responsibility to protect her.

He pulled her into a hug. "I'm so glad you're alright." He sighed. Lily tucked her arms up and buried herself deeper in James' arms.

"Could we just stay here today?" Lily spoke into his chest. James pulled back and grinned at Lily.

"You want to skip classes?"

She nodded. "I don't think I can concentrate today, anyway. We could just study?" She suggested innocently.

James shrugged. "I don't mind but I never thought you'd want to." Lily shrugged back. They walked over to the couch and sunk into each other's arms. He felt so strong, so secure, Lily thought. She could stay in his arms forever. She rested her head on his shoulder. James kissed her forehead.

"Are we together, James?" She asked uncomfortably.

He didn't know how to respond. She obviously liked him in some way. He hoped they were together. "I think so... I hope so," he said slowly. "What do you think?"

"I think we are." She answered. Her stomach squirmed and her heart raced.

"Good," James said simply. He held her tighter. "But maybe next time, you'll go to Hogsmede with me?"

"Of course." She snuggled closer.

Later that night, Lily motivated herself to get up and at least find a book to read. When she grabbed one out of her closet, she found a piece of paper lying at the bottom. She picked it up. It was her list of things to do this year. Getting attacked and going out with James Potter certainly weren't on the list, but a ball was. She took it out to James.

"What's this?" He asked as she handed it to him.

"It's a list of things I wanted to do this year. Ignore the first one..." She added. The first one was go out with Alex.

James laughed. "Will do," he scanned the rest of the page. "I was also thinking of some sort of ball, and maybe a Valentine's day Hogsmede trip for later on."

"Good idea," She said, rolling her eyes.

"You know you want to." He said, waggling his eyebrows at her. He grabbed her hips and pulled her onto the chair too. They squished in next to each other.

"Maybe," she teased.

"We can organise it after Quidditch training tomorrow. Halloween is pretty close; maybe we could have a masquerade ball." He suggested.

"Sure. Oh yeah, Quidditch match on Saturday..." She remembered.

"Yep." James quirked. Lily laughed at his face. She couldn't figure out why she had ever hated him.

"Maybe I'll come and watch." She hinted, smiling at him. James' face lit up, excitement bubbling in his stomach. He had to win.

"Really? Will you really come?" He squealed like a girl.

Lily laughed again. "Yep." James kissed her cheek. They were both a bit surprised. They just looked at each other. Lily smiled warmly and cuddled closer to him. This new feeling was rising... Something that was keeping her driven to him. Everything he did seemed attractive. The way his grin was lopsided. The way he ruffled his hair when he was nervous. They was he jiggled his knee when he was stressed or tapped his fingers when he was thinking. The way he stood, the way he walked and talk, the way his eyes looked at her. She was well and truly gone, there was no denying it.

The next day, the teachers didn't even comment on their absence the day before. The day was pretty average. James and Lily hardly left each other's side. They sat together; they walked to classes together; and sat outside for break together. Things only started getting interesting as they walked to the Heads dorm after class. James had his arm around Lily's waist when the saw him – Alex.

"Lily." He said, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"Alex." She replied stiffly. James glared at him, trying to stop himself from beating the git to a pulp.

"I just wanted to apologize. I'm so –," he began.

"Save it, Alex. I don't want to hear it." She cut him off. Lily held her head high and walked past him, but he caught her wrist.

James stepped forward. He knew Lily could look after herself but he had to right to even touch her, not after what he did. "Watch it, mate." James growled.

"What are you going to do about it, Potter?" Alex snarled.

"Beat your face in... Wand or no wand." James threatened.

Alex smirked. "I'd like to see you try." He said, before turning and leaving. He'd turned from a little suck up to a total prat in zero point five seconds. James made to go after him but Lily stopped him.

"Come on, let's go. You've got Quidditch practise." She reminded him. Lily couldn't even imagine studying right now, the thought made her head pound, so she followed James to the Quidditch pitch. She may as well start getting into it now. Lily left James to get changed and she found herself a seat around the Quidditch pitch.

James was very conscious Lily was watching him. He tried to be casual and practise properly but he couldn't help glancing at her nervously. He wanted to seem like a good captain. Well, he was anyway.

"Relax!" Sirius told him. It wasn't as easy as they thought. In the end, training went as well as usual. James thought they would easily beat Slytherin this Saturday. During training, they practised new defensive moves he and Sirius had prepared over the summer. He had three superb Chasers; Victoria Green, Blythe Millar, both in their seventh year, and Jackie smith, in fifth year. The three girls worked great together. They seemed to know what they each were thinking without communicating. His two Beaters, Sirius and Mack Brown, were an unstoppable duo. They were both energetic, completely crazy people so they just put all their energy into bashing a bludger at people. You'd have to be an expert to get past his Keeper, Mia King. Although she was a girl, they guys considered her as one of their own. She had the reflexes of a cheetah and was excellent at reading the play.

After training, James flew over to Lily in the stands. "What do you think? Are we going to win?" He asked.

"I'm not sure. I was too distracted by an incredibly attractive guy I saw flying on a broomstick." Lily said, shrugging her shoulders.

James' face darkened. "Who?"

Lily laughed and shook her head. "It was you, idiot."

"Oh." James blushed. Then his face changed. He looked up at her mischievously. He had an idea. "Want to hop on?" He asked, gesturing to his broom.

"No way... Never," Lily said, shaking her head furiously.

"Wrong answer," he said. James grabbed Lily by the waist and pulled her over the stands. Lily scrambled onto the back, no choice but to hold on. She squeezed her eyes shut.

"James Potter! Put me down. Put me down!"

"Lily! Calm down. Look, you're not going to fall. I've got you, trust me." He assured her.

"I do, I do trust you! But please put me down!" She said hysterically.

James wasn't going to give in to her Begging. He sped off, wind whipping through his hair. He had to convince Lily flying wasn't so bad. He went up a bit higher to get a better view of Hogwarts. "Open your eyes, Lily. It's beautiful."

Lily opened her eyes slightly and screamed, holding onto James tighter. "Alright, alright... It's beautiful, now put me down or I won't come on Saturday!" She screamed at him. James laughed and started making his decent. When they git the earth, Lily jumped off and started beating James with her fists.

"JAMES POTTER. WHO – DO – YOU – THINK – YOU – ARE?" She hit him in between every scream. James caught her by the wrists and pulled her close.

He whispered in her ear, "You're safe with me." Lily couldn't help it. She melted into him. She was freezing and he was the only warmth she could find.

Lily sighed. "Let's go. We've got stuff to plan." She tilted her head up and kissed his jaw, from near his ear, down to his chin then along his neck. James almost moaned out loud. Lily drove him crazy. Ever kiss was imprinted on him like electricity. He didn't know how long he could resist her lips. He didn't want to rush in and snog her. He didn't want to seem desperate.  
They walked back to the Heads dorm and got to work. What a day, Lily thought. She was finding it harder to resist James, but she didn't know what he wanted. Just like James, Lily was afraid of seeming desperate...


	10. Chapter 10 - Stress relief

**Chapter Ten**

Lily hadn't had a real conversation with her friends for a long time. She missed the fun and talks they used to have. It wasn't that James wasn't funny and interesting, but it just wasn't the same. Her friends knew her better than anyone else on the planet.  
Lily arrived down at breakfast and found her friends straight away, who were, for once, not with the Marauders. It was perfect timing.

"Hey guys." She said, sitting down next to them.

"Hi Lils," Morgan greeted.

"We haven't seen you in a while." Louise smiled.

"Exactly why I'm here," Lily said happily.

"What do you have in mind?" Morgan asked.

"I was thinking a little girls night... We can all camp in the Heads common room and I'll kick James out. Oh, and I'll bring some food." Lily suggested. The girls' faces lit up. They'd all been under so much stress lately, what with homework and You-Know-Who out there. They could use some fun.

"That sounds perfect," Louise said, "what time?"

"Nine o'clock tonight?" Lily said. The girls nodded. "Great. I've got to run; Divination first."

Lily stuffed a piece of toast down her mouth and walked out of the Great Hall. The Divination classroom was at the top of the North Tower; it would take her a while to get there. After travelling up several staircases, she arrived at the classroom. She climbed the ladder to the overly-heated and decorated room. Her usual seat near the window was free. Lily still didn't know why she continued Divination. It was much more interesting a couple of years ago, but now she knew it was just plain stupid. Lily daydreamed through the whole class. The pondered about tonight, James, her soft comfy bed – not that they were related... Still, her Divination teacher didn't know when she hadn't even touched her moon chart. How ridiculous, trying to read the future through moons. Divination finished and now she had History of Magic, which wasn't much more interesting, but she took notes like a good little girl. It didn't turn out to be as bad as she thought it would be. Lily had to stop herself from laughing out loud when James turned the teachers wig green, so he looked like an old wrinkly clown, or when he levitated his books over Snape's head. Next subject was Potions, which Lily excelled at but usually dreaded. Her teacher, Professor Slughorn, wouldn't stop fawning over her and her potions skills, sometimes commenting that she was better than Severus. Snape didn't seem to like that much. He used to be happy for Lily when they were friends, but now it just made him shoot dirty looks at Lily and Slughorn. At lunch break, it was a frosty Friday afternoon and she was sitting with the Marauders in one of the many courtyards in Hogwarts.

"What's everyone up to tonight?" Remus asked. He was sitting next to Louise again. They had been spending quite a lot of time together. Whenever Lily and Morgan asked about Remus, Louise blushed and quickly changed the subject. They never expected that she and Remus would like each other, but opposites attract, right? It seemed that way with James and Lily.

Morgan was about to answer but Lily quickly cut in. "Nothing, just having a quiet night." She said, sitting next to James on one of the benches, hands entwined. Morgan and Louise cast Lily questioning looks. Lily quickly shook her head, telling them to play along.

"Alright then..." Sirius said, looking between the girls, and then looked to James. "Is she always this weird?"

James laughed. "She's usually worse." Lily scoffed and punched his arm.

"Women..." Sirius whispered under his breath, but Lily knew he meant for Morgan to hear, who was right next to him.

"I heard that!" She slapped the back of his head.

They all returned to Defense Against the Dark Arts and then Muggle studies. James had a final Quidditch practise before the game tomorrow. This gave her extra time to get ready but there was one dilemma. She needed something from him. Something he valued very much. She figured he'd need softening up first.  
Once they were in the Heads common room later and James was about to leave, she stopped him.

"Wait, James." She said. He stopped and turned around.

"Yeah?" He had his broomstick over his shoulder. Lily stuck up her index finger and motioned for him to come closer. He grinned mischievously. Lily wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her hands in his hair. She stood on her toes and kissed his cheek, then down his jaw line, further down his neck and kissed all of the tender skin. She untangled her hands and slid them down his chest, then up under his shirt, feeling his nicely toned stomach. She suddenly appreciated Quidditch. Lily didn't do this on a regular basis, well not ever really, but she was enjoying.  
He couldn't quite figure out why she was running her hands all over him, but he wasn't complaining. Usually it was just a kiss on the cheek or a hug. In the back of his mind, he was a bit suspicious but he went with the flow.  
Lily pulled back and turned on her puppy dog eyes. Damn those eyes, James cursed.

"Can I pretty please borrow your Invisibility Cloak?" She asked and slid her hands down the front of him, dangerously close to the out-of-bounds area.

James' eyes fluttered. "Yeah... Sure..." Then something clicked in place and he registered what she had said. "Wait, what?"

"Please? It'll only take ten minutes." She asked.

"What for?" He asked suspiciously. His cloak was his most prized possession. He trusted Lily, but still...

"It's a surprise." She hoped this would convince him. It was partly true... But the surprised just want for him, was all.

He sighed. "Fine. I have to go, I'll be late. It's under my bed." He told her.

"Train hard!" She called after him, grinning.

"I'm already hard, thanks to you." He called back. Lily cracked up laughing, pleased with her work. Now she knew what she had to do if she ever needed something. She walked into room and saw it sticking out from under is bed. Now that she was in his room, alone, she had the urge to search it. But she knew she shouldn't. Plus, she didn't have time. She grabbed the cloak and run out of the portrait hole.

The one thing about going with James Potter is that you have to hang out with the rest of the Marauders too, which is more useful than one may think. Many times she had heard them talking about getting food from the kitchens. She knew exactly where it was and how to get in. She arrived outside the kitchens under the Invisibility Cloak and tickled the painting of the pear. A handle appeared and she grabbed it, pulling it open to reveal the kitchens.  
Lily gasped. She didn't know a hundred off House Elves worked there. They all started huddling around her, beaming from ear to ear. Lily smiled back nervously. She weaved in between all the elves. The room was quite large, wooden and there were four long tables, identical to the ones in the Great Hall.

"Good evening, miss. What have yous come to see us for?" A tiny elf spoke, a female by the looks of it, wearing her old battered clothes with the Hogwarts crest on it.

"I was just wondering if you have any spare food. I missed dinner." She lied.

"Oh yes, miss. Of course we does." The elf squeaked. About ten different elves come up, pushing sweet food and savoury food into her arms. She gathered as much as she could. She thanked the elves and then climbed back out, throwing the cloak back on. If she hurried, she could back in time to hide the food before James got back. She sped down the corridors to the Heads common room and whispered the password. Lily let out a long, relieved breath. James wasn't back yet. She shook off the cloak, laid it on the couch and carried the food into her room. Just as she threw it all under her bed covers, she heard James return.

"Lily?" He called out. Lily shook her hands and rolled her head back. Okay, be casual. She walked out like nothing was happening and smiled at the sight of him. His hair was all ruffled up – more than usual – and his Quidditch gear was all muddy.

She crinkled her nose. "Gross." James grinned. He started stripping off his gear right there and then. Thank heavens he kept his pants on at least. He chucked his shirt on the ground beside him. Lily blushed. She couldn't stop staring at his chest. She didn't even know how he could be so brown. Maybe he was just blessed with olive skin, unlike Lily, who was cursed with fair, milky skin.

James laughed at Lily's expression. "What's up?"

She pulled her eyes away from him. "Oh, um, not much... I've got some bad news for you, though."

James' face fell. "What is it?"

"Don't worry; it's not _that _bad." She said.

James raised his eyebrows, telling her to go on. He braced himself for what she was going to say. For a split second, he thought she was going to say she didn't want to be with him anymore. But she said it was nothing too bad...

"I need you to stay in Sirius' room tonight." She told him.

"Why?" He asked. Did she have a problem with him? Or did she need 'me time'?

"Morgan and Louise are coming over tonight. I haven't spoken to them much so we're going to camp out here and stuff." She explained.

"Oh, right... You know that the Quidditch game is tomorrow?" He said slowly.

"Of course I know. It's just for tonight. Is that alright?" She asked him with her puppy dog eyes.

James chuckled. "Yeah, it's fine. I understand. Sirius will be thrilled." He winked.

"Thank you." She ran over and jumped on him, wrapping her legs around his waist. James held her and buried his face in the nape of her neck. It wasn't too much strain on James; she was so light.

"I'm sorry, but I really do need you to leave." She said, sliding down. "You might want to put a top on and pack some stuff. The girls will be here soon." She checked her watch.

"Sure thing," he kissed her forehead. "What are you guys planning that needs me out of her so quickly?" He asked, walking over to his door.

"Oh, nothing," she said innocently, following him. "Just girls stuff."

James' eyes widened mockingly. "Sounds scary!" Lily rolled her eyes and pushed him into his room. James rushed around his room, grabbing clothes, a book, his wand and other things, stuffing them in a bag wile Lily was calling, "Hurry up!" He came out with his bog over his shoulder. Lily was sitting on the couch.

"I'm off." He said, walking over to her. He bent down low over her and kissed her neck.

Lily giggled. "See you tomorrow." James walked over to the portrait hole and she jumped up quickly, having an idea. "Wait!"

He stopped and faced her. She grabbed his face and brushed her lips against his briefly. "For luck," she told him. James looked down at her, too stunned to say anything. Eventually, he blinked and said, "Thanks," and then left.

Five minutes after he left, the portrait told her two girls were outside asking to come in. She let them in.

"Hey." Lily hugged them.

"Didn't have too much trouble getting lover-boy out?" Morgan teased.

"Shut up!" Lily laughed. "It was easy as pie." The girls grinned.

"Ready to get started?"

"Hell yeah."


	11. Chapter 11 - Sorry honey, girl time

**Chapter Eleven**

Lily told the girls to sit down while she quickly grabbed something. They shrugged and sat near the fire. Lily raced into her room and picked up as much off the food as she could. The girls saw what she was carrying and cheered. Lily sat with them and dropped the food into the triangle they had created with their knees. They grabbed something to eat and shoved it into their mouths.

"So, what shall we talk about?" Lily said through her mouthful of food.

Morgan clapped her hands twice. "Boys!"

Louise and Lily rolled their eyes but didn't protest. It was no secret that Lily and James were together but she didn't really want to go into detail about the personal stuff, not even with Louise and Morgan.

"Sorry, Lils, but we don't really want to hear about how amazing James is in bed when you 'do it'." Morgan said. She was a rather up front sort of person. Louise cracked up laughing

"We do not 'do it'!" Lily blushed.

"Because you don't want to or because you're afraid to?" Louise teased.

Lily didn't find it that funny. She hasn't really thought about it before. She thought she was a bit young and James hadn't really mentioned anything about it before.

Lily shrugged. "I don't know."

Her friends could tell she was serious about this and thought it would probably be best not to tease her about it. Morgan had slept with a guy before and thought her friends were rathe behind on the times. Louise was normally shy around other people but quite the opposite with her friends. She hadn't even had a boyfriend before.

"Do you want to?" Louise asked quietly.

Lily shrugged again, not looking at them.

"Are you and James serious? Like, do you love him?" Morgan asked.

Lily thought about it for a while, and then shrugged again.

"Come on, Lily!" Louise exclaimed. "Spit it out."

Lily looked at her friends then back down at her lap. "I suppose."

The girls giggled. "Have you told him?" Louise asked.

"Yeah, you should. Everyone knows he's crazy about you!" Morgan said, grinning.

"You really think so?" Lily couldn't help but smile now. Morgan and Louise nodded. Before anyone could say anything more, the portrait hole opened and Sirius walked in.

"Hello ladies!" He exclaimed, walking through the room towards James' room.

"Hey, wait! What are you doing here?" Lily asked.

"Well, Prongsie needs some underpants –,"

"Ew! Alright, get on with it then." Morgan yelled. Lily and Louise laughed.

"Sorry... Well, he knew you girls were having girl time or whatever so he was too afraid to come," Sirius smirked. "So I, being as brave as I am, volunteered. I was curious as to what girl time was all about, but looking at this," he gestured to them sitting on the floor, "it doesn't seem as interesting as I thought."

"What were you expecting exactly?" Morgan asked.

"Oh, you know the usual; pillow fights in bra's and underpants." He said casually.

The girls rolled their eyes. "Well, hurry up and get his stuff and leave." Lily said. Sirius saluted her then dashed into James' room. When he re-entered the common room, he held up a pair of red hearted boxers.

"This is his favourite pair. I bought them for him last Valentine's day." Sirius said fondly.

The girls cracked up laughing again. Morgan jumped up and started ushering Sirius out saying, "Sorry honey... girl time." But before he could leave, Lily called out, "How did you know the password?"

Sirius stuck his head back in the door and winked. "That's for me to know and for you to find out... It was very creative by the way."

Lily rolled her eyes as he left. Morgan returned to her original spot. "So what about you guys? Any boys that have tickled your fancy?" Lily grinned.

"Morgan's been snogging Sirius!" Louise blurted out.

"What?" Lily laughed. She though Louise was joking.

"It was only once or twice!" Morgan insisted innocently.

"Are you serious? Sirius Black?" Lily questions.

"I am serious about Sirius." Morgan said plainly. Louise laughed.

"Why?" Lily couldn't believe it. Morgan had always hated him.

"He's grown up. Well, sort of..." She said defensively. "I'm still a bit concerned about leaving him and James in the same room for a long period of time." She joked.

"They're probably glad to hang out again, like us. I mean, I haven't talk to you guys in ages and then I discover you are snogging Sirius!" Lily said.

"Well," Louise hesitated, "don't get angry Lily, but when you were going through all that stuff with James... It was a bit hard to talk to you. Now you're spending so much time with him, which is great, and we know you're busy with and stuff but yeah, anyway..." She said quickly, looking scared.

"It's okay, I understand. It's just hard with homework, Head Girl duties and other things but that's why I organised tonight. I missed you guys." Lily said quietly.

Morgan and Louise shared a look before jumping on Lily and hugging her. Lily laughed and fell backwards. They all sat up again, laughing.

"While we're on the subject of sharing things people are trying to hide," Morgan said mischievously, "Louise likes Remus!"

"I knew it! You two would be perfect. Have you told him?" Lily asked excitedly.

Louise shook her head. "No."

"You should! Please tell him. I know he likes you too!" Lily begged.

Louise shrugged. The girls sat in silence. It was late now; about eleven o'clock and the girls hadn't even noticed the fire growing smaller. Lily suggested they go to bed. Louise sparked up the flames again; Morgan flicked her wand and set up their beds while Lily moved the furniture back. Lily got set up on the couch and the other two took the floor in front of her. They all mumbled good night to each other and fell asleep instantly.


	12. Chapter 12 - Gryffindor vs Slytherin

**Chapter Twelve**

The next morning, James woke up at seven o'clock. He had a restless sleep and didn't even bother trying to go back to sleep. He was too nervous. Of course, he was fairly confident they would be Slytherin though. James finally dragged Sirius out of bed and told him to be ready by the time he got back. He walked through the empty corridors of Hogwarts and made his way to the Heads common room.  
He didn't really know what to expect when he walked in. He was anxious to make sure his Invisibility Cloak was safe. He only trusted the Marauders with it but he was sure Lily was responsible enough. He was even more curious to find out why Lily needed it. She never breaks school rules.  
James hesitated before whispering the password. He stepped in quietly and braced himself for the worst. But all he saw were three girls asleep. He tiptoed over to Lily sleeping on the couch. He bent down over the back of the couch and kissed her on the forehead. She moaned and turned onto her side. She was so beautiful. How did he get so lucky? James walked over to the other side of the couch, careful not to tread on the other girls, and slipped one arm under Lily's legs and the other around her back. As he pulled her up close, the blanket slipped off and revealed her tiny pyjama shorts and singlet. He smirked to himself and carried her slowly into her room. Lily had her arms around his neck and her head buried in her neck. She was half asleep, half awake and slightly aware of someone's strong arms around her. She kept her eyes closed as her head hit her soft pillow. She felt the doona being brought over her. She smiled and snuggled down into her bed.  
James walked out of Lily's room and back into the common room. He walked over to the other girls and whispered, "Morgan! Louise!" The two girls stirred and sat up slowly. Morgan rubbed her eyes tiredly and saw James kneeling next to them.

"Hey James," she looked around. "Where's Lily?"

"I took her into her room." He answered.

"Oh," she yawned, "you're a good guy."

"Sorry, but I have to get ready for Quidditch now." He said as kindly as he could.

"Sure, no problem. We'll go now. Good luck." Louise said, picking up her bag and following Morgan.

"Thanks." James said, standing up. Morgan wave as they left. James walked to his room and got changed into his Quidditch gear. He grabbed one of his books and sat on his bed. He read for twenty minutes in an attempting to calm himself down but he was too jittery. He jumped up off his bed, grabbed his broom and polishing kit and went to sit in the common room. He pulled out one of the wipes and began scrubbing furiously, hoping to distract himself from the churning feeling in his stomach. About ten minutes later, James heard Lily's door open and looked up to see her shuffling over, wrapped up in a blanket.

James laughed. "You look like a caterpillar."

"A caterpillar?" Lily frowned.

"A beautiful caterpillar." He corrected.

Lily continued shuffling towards him and plonked on the couch next to him, resting her head on his shoulders.

"Are you nervous?" Lily asked him.

"No." He lied.

"Yes you are," Lily giggled, "you always bounce your knee when you're nervous."

He hadn't even noticed he was doing it. He quickly stopped. How could she read him like that? If only he could read her that easily.

Lily giggled again. "Don't worry; you're going to be amazing.

"Thanks," he grabbed her hand and kissed it, "did you have fun last night?"

"Yeah." Lily answered,

"Sorry about Sirius..." James blushed, remembering which underpants Sirius chose and had no doubt he had showed the girls.

Lily stifled a laugh. "It's alright."

"What did you three do?"

"Talked."

"About?" He pressed.

"About how nosey you are." She grinned.

"Very funny. Okay, but you have to tell my why you needed my cloak," he said, "Where is it, by the way?"

"Don't worry; your precious cloak is safe. It's in my room. I needed it to get food from the kitchens." Lily said smugly.

"What? You stole from the kitchens? How do you know where it is?" He asked astonished.

Lily grinned. "I've been annoyed by the bloody Marauders for a long time. I hear things."

"I never told you how to get in there!" James said.

"You used to brag about it all the time!" Lily exclaimed, laughing.

"Oh..." James said. Lily nudged him and smiled.

"What time is the game?" She asked.

James checked his watch. "In an hour. Which reminds me, I have to make sure Sirius is ready."

"I have to shower. You go and get Sirius. I'll meet you at the Quidditch pitch." Lily said, getting up off the couch.

"Alright," James said, getting up as well. He snagged his arm round Lily's waist and brought her close, still wrapped in her blanket. He kissed her soft rosy cheeks. Lily could feel his lips on her cheek and her skin tingled. Her heart warmed the way it always did was James had his arms around her.

"See you later then." He whispered in her ear.

James walked back to the Gryffindor common room and into Remus, Sirius and Peter's dorm. He found Sirius still sleeping. James yanked the covers off him and pulled him onto the ground, telling him the game was in an hour and he had to get ready. James didn't leave until was dressed with his broomstick in hand.  
Lily turned the hot water off and wrapped a towel around her body. She got dressed into a pair of jeans and her Gryffindor jumper with a scarf around her neck and her hair tied up. Lily saw Remus in the crowd walking to the Quidditch pitch and ran to catch up with him. She smiled to herself, knowing a certain someone liked him very much. Remus and Lily met up with Morgan and Louise and found a place in the stands together. Louise and Remus said hello awkwardly while Lily and Morgan grinned at each other.

"The Slytherin team," shouted the commentator, Mark Johnson, "Captain; Malfoy and his team; Black, Davis, Harris, Wood, Graham and Owens." There were cheers from the Slytherin's and boos from the Gryffindor's and pretty much everyone else.

"The Gryffindor team..." Mark shouted, "Captain; Potter and his team; Black, green, Millar, Smith, Browne and King." The Slytherins' boos were drowned by the cheers of Gryffindor, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff.

James shook hands with Malfoy and mounted his broom. As soon as the whistle was blown, he kicked off the ground and flew high above the ground, listening to the commentary.

"It's Green of Gryffindor with the Quaffle – she passes to Millar – who passes to Smith – oh ouch, intercepted by Davis – Davis hot by a Bludger from Black of Gryffindor – Smith grabs the Quaffle an passes to Green – now Millar – now Green – and green scores! 10 – 0 to Gryffindor!" James snapped out of his trance and continued flying.

He could see Sirius' brother, Regulus, trailing behind him. James ducked under a Bludger and flew down lower, dodging a couple of Chasers. After ten minutes of seeing no snitch, the scores were level – 80 to 80. James kept an eye on Regulus while looking for the snitch himself. Then he saw it, buzzing around the Slytherin Keeper. James turned his broom around and sped towards Slytherin's goal hoops. When the Keeper, Owen, saw James coming, he veered out of the way, thinking James was after him. Now James dived, Regulus hot on his tail. James was almost flat against his broom, willing it to go faster. He out-stretched his arm and leaned forward.  
His fingers closed over the snitch just before he hit the goal post. James pulled his broom up and held his arm in the air. He was deafened by the roars of the crowd. James ruffled his hair, feeling thrilled and exhilarated. He looped a couple of times to vent his happiness and flew down to meet his teammates. Arms covered his vision and he could feel hands messing up his hair, not to mention Sirius yelling, "We won! You did it old Prongsie!"

James chucked the snitch to Sirius and hopped back on his broom. He flew up and started searching the stands for a particular red-head. James must've looked mad, grinning like an idiot. He had so much adrenalin pumping through him he could not stand still. He spotted her straight away, waving her Gryffindor scarf in the air.  
Lily saw James heading straight for her. Her voice was all croaky from cheering so much. Her friends were trying to calm her down but weren't doing very well. James stopped right in front of her and grinned before cupping her face in his hands and kissing her lips.  
It was the best kiss Lily had ever had. Better than Alex's, better than everyone's. Lily pushed her hands through his hair and pressed against his lips harder. They were warm and inviting. He tasted like mint. Electric shocks charged through Lily like lightning. This was their first actual kiss. They hadn't talked about it but it seemed they were waiting for a good time. Now was perfect.  
James and Lily broke apart. They hadn't noticed that everyone had gone quiet and were staring at them. Until, "About time!" Sirius yelled. Everyone cheered, except for the Slytherin's of course.

"Come on, let's get out of here." James said in Lily's ear, holding out his hand. Lily held onto him as she jumped on. She kissed his cheek and snuggled into his back. She had never felt more secure.


	13. Chapter 13 - The beans are spilt

**Chapter Thirteen**

It was Sunday morning and Lily, Louise, Morgan and the Marauders were sitting at the Gryffindor table eating breakfast. Last night, Sirius held a party in the Gryffindor common room. Lily didn't feel like going, plus, she had a pile of homework the size of Mount Everest. James said he would stay with her but Lily insisted that he went. So she stayed in her room by herself, trying to do homework while her head pounded. She ended up falling asleep on her books before James got back.  
In two months, it would be Christmas holidays and Lily had totally forgotten about the trip to Australia with her family.

"What's everyone doing for Christmas?" Remus asked the group.

"I'll be at Prongs' house." Sirius mumbled through his mouthful of food.

"Which reminds me, Moony; you're coming to my place as well." James said.

"Sorry, Prongs, but I promised the parents I would come home but –," Remus was cut off by a loud clattering noise next to James. Lily had dropped her head on the plate and her knife and fork had disappeared under the table.

"She only does that when she's remembered something." Morgan said, like it was normal that Lily bashed her head on plates all the time.

"What is it now, Lils?" Louise asked.

Lily groaned. "I have to go on a _family holiday, _remember?"

"Damn. I was hoping you could come to my place too." James said.

"Sorry," Lily mumbled.

"Where are you going?" Peter asked.

"Australia." Lily answered with her head in her hands. James had his head down too.

She was frustrated that she had to miss all this just because her parents thought it would be fun to go away. All her friends would be going to James' house and she would be stuck with her sister.  
James was so excited about finally introducing Lily to his parents as her girlfriends. Plus, it would be so great to have all his friends at his place for Christmas.

"Australia's not too bad – much warmer..." Remus said in an attempt to cheer Lily up.

Lily shrugged. "I suppose."

"Well, let's forget about that!" Sirius said. Lily tolled her eyes. "Let's figure out what we are doing today."

Before anyone could answer, the post arrived. A particularly large brown old landed in front of Remus carrying a copy of the Daily Prophet. Remus handed the own one Knut.

"You actually read that thing?" Morgan sneered. Her ad her family were very Anti-Ministry.

"Yes. It's good to keep up with all the nonsense they make up." Remus retorted. He unfolded the paper and turned to the first page. His face turned from curious to horrified. He turned paler and paler as he read the article. Whatever it was, it wasn't good...

"What? What is it?" Lily asked. Was it another death? Could it be someone they knew? Remus passed the paper to James. James' eyes grew wider as he read on. He quickly snapped it shut and got up.

"We'll be back in a second." James said quickly, dragging Sirius and Peter with him. They all ran out of the Great Hall as quick as they could.

Lily turned to the girls with a bewildered look on her face. "What the hell was that about?"

"I have no idea." Louise replied, looking just as confused as Lily.

The Marauders ran to the only place they knew where it private enough to talk about what they had just read; the Room of Requirement. James pushed the door open and strode over to a wooden table in the middle of the room and slammed the paper down.

"Who does she think she is? How could they do this? I'm going to kill her!" James raged.

"That makes two of us, Prongs." Remus sighed, running a hand through his hair. James chucked the paper to Sirius. Peter read it over his shoulder.

"Anti-Werewolf Legislation?" Peter asked.

"That's ridiculous. They can't be serious..." growled Sirius.

The boys sat in silence, fuming. Now that there was this Anti-Werewolf legislation, it pretty much made it impossible for Remus to get a job, or buy his own house, or have children legally. He's one of the smartest in the year, James thought, he had a pretty good chance at becoming Minister of Magic, but now he was unable to even buy groceries.

"What am I going to do now?" Remus said sadly.

"I'm sure Dumbledore can help. He let you come here." James said hopefully.

"I don't mean to be a buzz kill, but if Voldemort keeps up his work, there isn't going to be a Ministry... I thought we were going to join the Order anyway?" Sirius said.

"Well, yes, but it doesn't make this any less horrible." James replied.

Sirius threw his hands up in the air. "I know, trust me. I'm sorry mate." He said to Remus.

"Lily isn't going to let this go easily. I think you should tell her, Moony. I think she suspects something anyway." James told Remus.

Remus shook his head. "I couldn't. She wouldn't ever look at me the same."

"You know that's not true. Lily isn't that kind of person." James insisted.

"Prongs, just because you're on love with her doesn't mean we all are. Leave the man alone. If he doesn't want to, he doesn't have to." Sirius snapped.

"I'm not saying you have to be! I know Lily, she would understand completely." James retorted. It wasn't often Sirius and James disagreed.

"How do you know? Does she have another werewolf friend for an example?" Sirius bit back.

James was about to answer when Remus cut them off. "Shut it! I'll tell her when I'm ready. Full moon tomorrow night, see you then." With that, Remus strode out of the room. The others slowly followed. James walked back to the Heads common room and found Lily waiting for him.

"Hey, what happened? Is Remus okay?" Lily asked, jumping up.

"Yeah, he's fine. Don't worry about it." James said dismissively.

"Tell me what happened." Lily said firmly.

"It was just something the Ministry wrote." He lied again.

Lily raised her eyebrows. "Yeah right..."

James sighed, sitting in one of the arm chairs. "I can't tell you, Lils."

Lily stood in front of James, hands on her hips. "I'm about to ask you something and you're going to answer me truthfully."

James heart raced. He thought he had an idea what she was going to ask. "Alright..."

"Is Remus a werewolf?" Her face didn't give away any emotion.

"Look, Lily, moony was going to wait until he was ready to tell you, but now that you've guessed..." He trailed off. Moony was going to kill him.

"So he is?" Lily pressed. James nodded.

Lily sighed and melted into the chair with James. "The poor thing."

"How did you find out?" He asked into hair. She smelt sweet, like flowers.

"I saw signs. And I checked the page you were looking at." She stated.

"Remind me never to underestimate you," James laughed. "Moon isn't goig to be happy."

"Oh my God, I just understood why you call him that." Lily exclaimed.

"Well done." James said unenthusiastically.

"Why are you Prongs?" Lily asked.

"Now _that_ is something I definitely can't tell you." He grinned.

Lily got up. "I have to go and talk to Remus."

Lily looked everyone for him; the Gryffindor common room, his dormitory, the Great Hall, the grounds and the Astronomy Tower. She didn't know why she didn't think of the library sooner."  
She saw him sitting there all by himself and rushed over to him. She grabbed his arm, not saying a word.

"Woah! Lily, what are you doing?" He asked.

She didn't answer. She dragged him out of the library and out of the school, onto the grounds and down to the tree near the Black Lake. She stopped and faced him before flinging her arms around his neck.

"Why didn't you just tell me?" She cried.

"What?" He said, although he had a pretty good idea what she was talking about.

"I don't care if you're a werewolf, you're my friend!" She said.

Remus' face drained. "How did you know?"

Lily rolled her eyes. "I'm not dumb!"

Remus let out a long breath and slid down the tree. "I didn't want you to found out this way. So, you don't think I'm a m-monster?" He hesitated.

Lily sat next to him. "Of course I don't!"

"Thank God." He laughed shakily.

"You should tell Morgan and Louise." Lily said.

Remus shook his head. "No way, they wouldn't understand."

"I did!" Lily protested.

"So? You're different." He replied.

"Speaking of Louise... you should ask her out, she likes you. She's just too shy to admit it." Lily told him.

Remus let out a bark-like laugh. "Yeah right... She wouldn't if she knew what I was."

"What? A kind, generous and amazing person?" Lily suggested.

Remus snorted. "A monster."

Lily shook her head. "I'm not going to force you, but be positive. You've got heaps of friends who love you. Just because of this, doesn't make you a horrible person." She told him.

"Thanks, Lily." Remus smiled.

Lily jumped up and pulled Remus with her. "Come on, let's do something fun. Let's break some rules." She said happily, skipping towards the castle.

Remus ran to catch up. "You're spending way too much time with Prongs." He laughed.

"True." She giggled.


	14. Chapter 14 - The Stag and Dog

**Chapter Fourteen**

Lily couldn't believe she had just said those words. Let's go and break some rules? Well, everyone was in the need for some fun. Lily rounded up Sirius, Morgan, and Louise and took them to James and Remus. They couldn't find Peter. They all sat in the Heads dorm waiting for Lily to go on.

"Therefore, I think we should do something fun!" She clapped her hands together. She had just finished explaining that everyone was too uptight these days and that they should do something entertaining.  
They all started at Lily. James laughed and shook his head.

"What?" She asked, bouncing her knees.

"He thinks you're mental." Sirius said.

Lily rolled her eyes. "So... who's in?"

"Usually, I would agree with Sirius but you're my friends so I'm in." Louise grinned.

"I'm in." Morgan declared.

Lily jumped up with excitement. The two girls joined her, with their arms on their hips, waiting for the boys to answer.

"Fine." Remus said, getting up slowly and joining them.

"I'm all for it." Sirius grinned. He didn't seem to mind that the girls had gone 'mental'.

"Come on, James! I know it's totally out of character for me but you can't deny that we need some fun." Lily insisted.

"Yeah, I don't mind, it's just that..." Well, tonight was full moon and James didn't want to risk Remus being out at night. They would just have to make sure they were back before the moon came out. "Don't worry; let's do it!"

The six of them decided to go into Hogsmede, seeing as it was another two weeks until the next trip. James told the girls about the one-eyed witch passage that led to Honey Jukes. When the girls asked how they found it, Sirius simply replied, "Knowledge, exploration and good looks." He tapped his temple with his finger. They sent Morgan first to make sure no one was around. Ten she would report back. Once the coast was clear, James would take one person at a time into the passage. First he took Sirius, then Remus, then Morgan, then Louise and last of all, Lily. He threw the cloak over her and took her hand, leading her to the passage. James climbed in after Lily and sealed the entrance.  
The six friends lit their wands and travelled through the cold, stony tunnel. After Lily counted about three-hundred steps, they started going uphill and Lily, leading the pack, banged her head on something hard.

She rubbed her head and Sirius laughed. "Whoops, I must've forgotten to mention the trap door."

James shoved Sirius to the side and opened the trap door an inch. No one was there. He took one person at a time again. Once they navigated through the near empty sweet store, they were in the Main Street and James tucked the cloak away.

They all grinned at each other. "Where shall we go?"

They decided to go to the Three Broomsticks and have a nice, warm mug of butterbeer. James sat next to Lily and slipped an arm around her waist. Morgan sat next to Sirius and Louise sat next to Remus. James jumped up quickly and said, "I'm going to order some drinks. Who's coming?"

"I'll come!"

"Me too."

"Coming!"

Sirius, Morgan and Lily jumped up, leaving Remus and Louise still sitting. They blushed and began fiddling. The others grinned at each other and continued to the counter. James ordered six butterbeer's and pay for them all. Madam Rosmerta didn't seem to think it was weird that sic students were out of school, especially when it was not a Hogsmede weekend. This made Lily wonder. How many times had the Marauders sneaked out without Dumbledore knowing?  
The Double Trio they liked to call themselves, spent an hour in the Three Broomsticks drinking butterbeer's and listening to entertaining story by Sirius, mostly of James. Like when he made a list of tings not to do because they annoyed Lily. She just smiled, not commenting.

Later they all went to Zonko's, which was the highlight of the night for the boys but which turned out to be very boring for the girls. So they left the boys and went to one of the dress shops down the road. As soon as they walked in, Morgan gasped and ran straight for a rack of dazzling green dresses.

"Lily! You have to buy this!" She squealed.

"Where would I wear it?" Lily asked.

"Oh... Yeah..." Morgan said, putting it back.

"Wait!" Lily just remembered. "James and I are organising a Halloween ball!"

"Genius!" Louise said, throwing her hands up in the air.

Lily went to grab some money out of her bag and realised it wasn't there. She gasped. "Crap, I left my bag with James!"

Lily left the shop and ran down the main street back to Zonko's. She didn't know why she was so excited. Nothing ever happened at Hogwarts so what better way to lighten up her last year?  
Lily skidded to a halt and pushed the door open to Zonko's but there was no one there. The girls gave her questioning looks. Lily shrugged her shoulders and stopped to think. What other shop would they go to? Maybe they went back to Honey Jukes.

"Honey Jukes?" She suggested to the others.

"Yep."

So they started speed walking towards Honey Jukes, Lily half a pace in front. It was probably about five o'clock now and it was starting to get darker. The sun could just be seen over the horizon and if they didn't get back to Hogwarts quickly, somebody would realise they were missing from dinner.  
When they arrived at Honey Jukes and found that nobody was there, Lily was even more confused. Surely they would tell her if they were leaving? Lily couldn't think of any other places they would be. Half of the owners had closed up their shops and were turning in for the night.

A chilly breeze tickled Lily's back. She had no idea where the boys were and she was all alone with just Louise and Morgan. They seemed to be panicking just as much as Lily. Lily turned and headed for the Three Broomsticks, her friends following closely. Maybe Madam Rosmerta would know where they were. But she didn't. She apologized and told the girls she had to close the shop for the night.  
The sun was gone. Lily turned to the girls to form a plan.

"What do we do now?" Lily breathed.

"I have no idea." Louise answered.

Lily looked around, hoping the boys would jump out and say, "Surprise!" But there was no one around, nothing besides darkness. The wind howled and Lily shivered. She felt completely cut off from the world. She felt three-thousand miles away from Hogwarts.

"Maybe they c-couldn't find us a-and went back t-to Hogwarts, thinking we had gone b-back already." Lily's teeth chattered as she spoke.

"Well, maybe. Okay, how about this; we go back to Hogwarts, see if the boys are there, if they aren't then... then..." Morgan trailed off.

"Yeah, but if they aren't there..." Louise said.

"We don't have a better plan so let's just go." Lily said. They walked back to Honey Jukes, huddling close together. Lily pushed the door but it didn't open. She pushed it again. It would budge.

Lily swore under her breathe. "Alohomora!" Still, the door didn't open. "How are we supposed to get in now?"

"Break in?" Morgan suggested. No one was too thrilled with that idea.

Louise let out a strangled sob and slid down to the ground. Morgan and Lily sat down too and put their arms around her.

"It's okay, we'll be alright." Lily said soothingly.

There was a loud cry from somewhere in the distance. It rebounded off every window and made Lily shudder. She didn't know where the cry came from but it was definitely human. She pulled the girls up and headed towards the sound. Her heart was pounding in her chest. There was another loud shout and the girls stopped before looking at each other and continuing. They walked to the end of the main street where it turned into a small forest.

Lily slapped her head. "Of course! The other side of this forest is the Shrieking Shack... that's probably what the sound is from."

"Yes, but that didn't sound like whatever lives there. Besides, it sounded closer." Morgan said.

"That's true. Well, I don't know about you guys but I would like to see what's happening." Lily said.

The other two didn't protest. The girls headed into the forest nervously. It wasn't as thick as the Forbidden Forest, packed with dangerous creatures, it was just all trees. The girls only had to walk fifty meters until they were out the other side.  
They emerged from the forest and looked up the hill that held the Shrieking Shack. Louise screamed. Lily had to stop herself from screaming too. Halfway up the hill stood James and Sirius staring transfixed, horrified, at Remus. Well, it wasn't Remus. It was half Remus and half werewolf. He was hunched over, howling. Lily could see his feet expanding and his head transforming. Suddenly, he was a fully grown, vicious werewolf, readying to attack.

"James!" Lily cried.

James' head shot up. "Lily! What are you – RUN!" The werewolf had spun around when Lily called out. Now he was heading straight for them.

Before their eyes, James and Sirius transformed; James into a stag and Sirius into a large shaggy dog. Lily was too stunned to move. Her head was going to explode. Sirius and James were Animagus? Morgan and Louise were trying to pull Lily away but she wouldn't move. She was too busy watching what was unfolding in front of her.  
The black dog – Sirius – had gotten a hold of the werewolf with its teeth and dragged it to the ground. Then the stag – James – had locked it down with its massive antlers. The werewolf struggled to escape James' grasp. It kicked and scratched but James didn't let up. The werewolf, sensing defeat, went limp under James. James got up slowly and released the werewolf. The three animals all sat back panting. The werewolf seemed to have forgotten that three fresh humans were standing a hundred meters away. Lily watches as the dog and the stag escorted the werewolf towards the Shrieking Shack. As soon as they disappeared into the shadows, Lily sunk to the ground.

"What just happened?" She mumbled.

"I have no idea." Morgan said, sitting next to her.

"Remus – he's a – he's a –," Louise stammered.

"A werewolf," Lily whispered.

"Someone has to have noticed we are gone! It's way past dinner now. Lily, can you do one of those Patronus things?" Morgan asked.

"Yes." She said, standing up. She hadn't ever done one before but she knew the basics. She could only keep it around for a little so she kept the message short. "We are near the Shrieking Shack in Hogsmede. Need help." Her Patronus whooshed off to Professor Dumbledore. Before it left, she got a glimpse pf it. It was larger. It had changed into a doe. What did that mean? Lily thought. She didn't even know it could change. It was an owl before.  
The girls huddled together and waited, and waited.


	15. Chapter 15 - Truth

**Chapter Fifteen**

Lily, Morgan and Louise were huddled together at the bottom of a tree at the edge of the forest when Dumbledore arrived accompanied by Professor McGonagall. Lily heard them before she saw then. She heard a twig snap and jumped up in alarm only to find a seething Professor McGonagall storming towards them, followed by a very calm Professor Dumbledore who was holding up his midnight blue robes, stepping of branches and roots.

"Miss Evans! What were you thinking, coming out here without permission? Who knows what could've happened to you three! I am deeply disappointed in you. In all my years, I have never seen such disgraceful behaviour from a Head Girl! You –," Professor McGonagall rambled, throwing her arms around.

"Minerva, please. Contain yourself." Dumbledore said coolly.

"_Contain myself? _Albus, do you know what these girls have just done?" Professor McGonagall cried.

"We may never find out if you keep scolding them. Now, Minerva, please let me talk to Miss Evans about the events of tonight." Dumbledore sighed.

The whole time, Lily had been looking at her feet, a tear dripping of the end of her nose. Professor McGonagall was right. She was stupid for dragging everyone into this mess. How could she not have seen it was a full moon tonight? And it had been all her idea.

"Miss Evans?" Dumbledore said softly.

Lily looked up through her tears. "Yes, sir."

"Could you please tell me what you made you venture out here tonight?"

"Well – well, I decided it would be a fun sort of b-break. You see, we're all kind of feeling the pressure, sir. Many of the people I know are being affected by You-Know-Who. We three and the Marauders thought it would be fun to come out here and you know..." Even as she was saying it, she knew how stupid it sounded. She regretted this idea entirely.

"Please, sir. It's not just Lily's fault, we all agreed." Louise said quietly, grabbing hold of Lily's hand tightly.

"Yeah, it's just as much our fault as it is hers." Morgan added, takin hold of Lily's other hand.  
Another tear leaked out of Lily's eye. How was she so lucky to have friends like these? She really didn't deserve them. Or James, she thought to herself bitterly. She was so ashamed.

"That's very kind of you two but what I would like to know is where Mr Potter, Black and Lupin are?" Dumbledore asked curiously.

"Well, they are in the – ah – Shrieking Shack, sir." Morgan answered uneasily.

"How did that come to be?" Dumbledore asked.

Lily took a deep breath. "We last saw them at Zonko's, sir. We left them there and went to a shop further down the street. When we came back they were gone. We figured they'd gone to another store so we searched for them but couldn't find them anywhere. Anyway, we were going to go back through the passage-way James showed us but Honey Jukes was closed."  
Lily had to tell Dumbledore about the passage-way otherwise there would've been a massive gap in their story. She glanced at the girls uneasily.  
"All the stores were closing and we were starting to panic when we heard someone or something scream so we headed towards it. We came out of this forest and saw – and saw Remus – transforming into a – into a –," Lily couldn't say it. Poor, poor Remus. She couldn't even imagine how painful the transformation must be.

"Ah, you found out about Mr Lupins condition." Dumbledore nodded gravely.

"So it's true? Remus is a – a werewolf?" Louise sobbed.

"Yes," he nodded. "Please continue, Miss Evans."

"So yeah, we saw him transform and he – um – went into the Shrieking Shack with James and Sirius." She concluded.  
She purposely left out the park about James and Sirius being Animagi. She was pretty sure it was illegal to be an unregistered Animagus and didn't want to get them into trouble with the Ministry. She knew her story was a lame one and Dumbledore knew it too. Lily could feel his eyes x-raying her but he didn't say anything.

"Very well. Hagrid is waiting for you back in Hogsmede. He will escort you back to the castle. Please visit Madam Pomfrey on your way to bed; she will have something for you all." Dumbledore said. Professor McGonagall stood with her arms crossed, looking at them sternly.

"Thank you, sir." Morgan mumbled before leading Lily and Louise into the forest, back to Hogsmede.  
They were twenty meters in when Lily looked back to see Dumbledore but he had vanished, along with Professor McGonagall.  
They emerged on the other side of the trees and found Hagrid waiting. He didn't say anything, just jerked his head motioning for them to follow him. The journey back to Hogwarts seemed to take twice as long in the dark and silence.  
Lily kept her eyes on the ground most of the time, occasionally looking at the others. The whole way back gave her time to brood. How could James not tell her she was an Animagus? She understood why he kept Remus' werewolf situation a secret, because it wasn't his to tell, but being an Animagus was completely different. Lily didn't expect him to tell her everything about himself; everyone has secrets, but she felt like she deserved to know this.  
She wondered why James had decided to become an Animagus. It was an extremely complex piece of magic to perform. He must've only changed this year, which made her angrier, seeing as they started dating this year. He couldn't have done it any younger – that's impossible. But how were they so skilled at containing Remus in his werewolf form like that? It looked like they had done it a million times.

Hagrid left them when they entered the front door of Hogwarts. The castle was completely deserted. Not to mention silent. The girls started making their way to the Hospital Wing when they encountered Filch.

"What are you here doing wondering the corridors at this time of night?" He snarled.

"Professor McGonagall instructed us to go to the Hospital Wing." Lily said tiredly; she was in no mood to argue with Filch, not after tonight.

"A likely story; we'll see about this." He grinned nastily, bearing his yellow teeth.

Professor McGonagall appeared around the corner. "They are with me, Mr Filch." She glared at him and his foul little cat, Mrs Norris. Filch huffed and turned on his heel, slouching away with Mrs Norris trotting after him, looking back at her with her lamp-like eyes.

Professor McGonagall nodded at them. "Off you go, girls."

They smiled thankfully and continued to the Hospital Wing. When they arrived, Madam Pomfrey already had a rich blue potion awaiting them. The potion felt like hot melted chocolate sliding down their throats and into their stomach. They thanked Madam Pomfrey and went to Lily's dorm first.  
Lily stopped outside the portrait and smiled at Morgan and Louise.

"Will you be okay?" Louise asked sadly.

"Yes. How about you two? Are you all right?" She answered. They nodded.

"Look, Lily, I'm sure James –," Morgan started.

"I'm fine. It's all right, we'll talk tomorrow. I really have to sleep." She cut her off. Lily gave them a smile and entered the Heads dorm. No one was there. She didn't know why she expected James to be there. He would still be with werewolf-Remus. She just wanted answers but she figured she would be too emotionally unstable to talk to him right now; she'd probably just end up screaming at him.

Lily tried to find sleep but it proved impossible. No matter what she did, she would end up thrashing from side to side in frustration.  
She drifted into sleep a couple of times only to have nightmares about werewolves and humans transforming. She didn't know what time it was when she finally fell asleep but it felt like five in the morning.  
After about an hour and a half's sleep, she heard James return. Lily whipped off her covers and sped into the Common room. Her plan of confronting him completely deteriorated at the sight of him.  
There James stood with no top on, just a pair of torn jeans with dark stains on them that looked horribly like blood. He had gashes on his shoulders and sides, a blood lip and busted nose.

Lily gasped, covering her mouth with her head. She walked over to him and pulled her sleeve down, dabbing at the blood on his lip and nose.

James grabbed her arm and removed it from his face. "Lily, I'm fine, seriously."

"You don't look fine." She pulled her arm out of his grip. "Jesus Christ, James. What happened?"

James let out a long breath. "Lily, please. Can we talk about this later? I really need to sit down."

"I'm sure you do but have you noticed you're covered in blood?" She pointed out.

James looked down at himself then shook his head, pushing past Lily and entered his room. Lily was going to protest but she stopped herself. He was right and he was probably exhausted. She stood there for a couple of minutes, staring at his open door. It was like an invitation.

She sighed and walked over to his room. She knocked on the door frame lightly. James was lying on his back, hands behind his head staring up at the roof. He looked over at her when she knocked and immediately moved over, lifting up the covers for her.  
She smiled weakly and tip-toed over to him, sliding into bed with him. Her body instantly warmed next to his. They looked at each other on their sides, their noses almost touching. Lily ran the back of her finger down his cheek and kissed him deeply. James winced. She'd kissed the sore side of his lip.

Lily giggled and whispered, "Sorry."

James slipped an arm around her and brought her closer, their bare legs tangling. Lily buried her head in James' chest. He stroked her hair and kissed her forehead. No matter what just happened, James couldn't feel happier. It was heaven on earth, being this close to her. And for Lily, it was sanctuary, buried in James. She planted a kiss on his muscled chest and relaxed her body. She was safe now. No more dark night and scary silence. No more werewolves and giant dogs. Just James and Lily.  
She felt asleep, dreaming about her new doe Patronus, galloping around with a stag.


	16. Chapter 16 - Owl Post

**Chapter Sixteen **

Lily and James woke up late on a sunny Sunday morning. When Lily first woke, she forgot she was in James' room and bolted up right. She looked around quickly and rubbed her eyes, finally registering where she was She looked over at James and found him awake, the covers down at his waist, showing his lean chest. He was propped up on his elbows, grinning at the sight of her messy hair and crinkled singlet.  
Lily looked down at her clothes and then jumped out of bed, running over to James' mirror. She looked absolutely horrible with her crazy bedhead and tired eyes. She was so embarrassed.

"I look disgusting." She groaned, flattening her hair and straightening her clothes.

"Good morning to you too, gorgeous." James laughed. Lily could see him behind her in the mirror, sitting in bed.

Lily snorted and rolled her eyes. She made her way back to the bed, jumping on top of him. He winced but tried not to show it.

She cursed under her breath. "Oh crap, I'm so sorry. Let me see." James pulled the covers off, only wearing boxer shorts. He didn't mind Lily seeing him half-naked, but Lily blushed, trying to concentrate on the dried up blood covering his chest.  
The gashes on his shoulder and side had scabbed up now and new purple-grey bruises has formed around his robs. She sighed and leaned against him.

"We are going to Madam Pomfrey." She murmured.

James shook his head, about to object but Lily grabbed his hand and tried to drag him out of bed, but he was just too heavy and remained there stubbornly.

"Just get up!" Lily groaned. James unwillingly got up and stretched carefully. His ribs were aching. Lily chucked him a shirt and jeans to put on. "Put that on. We're seeing Madam Pomfrey and then we are going to talk."

James groaned, earning himself a glare from Lily.

"I'm going to get dressed." With that, she stomped out and into her room.

She was frustrated. How could he expect her not to be curious? Transforming into an Animagus at his age was a pretty big deal.  
She was so distracted getting dressed that she put her top on the wrong way. She tugged it off and pushed her arm through the right hole this time. She walked into the common room and motioned for James to follow her. He grudgingly got up and followed her.

It was just after lunch so the school was pretty busy, everyone walking off to their next class. James and Lily pushed through a group of third-years and had to break up a fight between two fifth-years. James tried to take Lily's hand but she pulled it away and walked faster. He was a tad disappointed but he expected her to be pissed off.  
To him, it wasn't a big deal. It wasn't going to make a difference whether she knew or not.  
Lily, on the other hand, thought the opposite. Relationships were supposed to be about trust and honesty, right? He couldn't even trust her with something like that? As if she'd ever tell anyone. She knew the consequences, probably even better than James does himself.

As soon as Madam Pomfrey saw James enter, she sighed. "What happened now, Mr Potter?"

"It's wonderful to see you, Poppy." James flashed her one his infamous smiles. Lily elbowed him. "Well, Sirius and I were mucking around –,"

"Say no more." Madam Pomfrey said, holding up a hand. "Come over here and let's get out checked out."

James raised his eyebrows at Lily, grinning. She crossed her arms stiffly and followed him to one of the beds. Madam Pomfrey gave him a potion to bend broken bones. Apparently he had two cracked ribs. Next, she handed him a jar of groggy, green cream to rub on his cuts and bruises.

He held it out to Lily once Madam Pomfrey was gone. "Want to do the honours?"

Lily rolled her eyes, not in the mood. "Not particularly, Potter."

James lowered his eyebrows. So, it was back to Potter again, was it? He couldn't pretend he wasn't a little bit hurt that she was so pissed. He didn't even understand why.

"Fine," he said plainly. Giving Lily one last look, he scooped out some cream and spread it over ribs, eye and lip.

"I'll be in the Heads common room." Lily said. She was about to bend down and kiss him but changed her mind, making it look like she just twitched awkwardly. She looked at James one last time before she turned and left. She could see the hurt in his eyes and wanted to go back and explain herself, but she kept walking.

On her way back, she saw a very tired and battered Remus. He was on his way to the library, holding some book.

"Hey, Remus, how are you feeling?" Lily asked him.

Remus gave her a small smile. "I'm all right, first morning after is always the worst." Lily gave him a comforting squeeze on the shoulder. "Where's Prongs?"

They walked into the library and found a spot at the front. Lily put her head in her hands. "He's in the Hospital Wing." She mumbled.

"Oh." Remus said guiltily, looking down.

Lily held his hand. "It's not your fault, Remus. James is your best friend, he doesn't mind; even if it means turning into an Animagus." She sighed, looking away.

"Are you two all right?" Remus asked quietly. Lily didn't say anything. She just shrugged, letting a tear drop down her cheek. Remus wiped it away.

"I just thought he would tell me." Lily said quietly. He nodded.

Over in the corner, Louise was watching them with a sour expression on her face. The guy she loved didn't even take any notice of her. He certainly took notice of Lily though. What does she have that I don't? Everything, Louise thought.

At the entrance, after searching the Heads common room stood James watching his girl and one of his best friends getting up close and personal. He watched as they held hands, his stomach churning. He kicked the wall angrily. Wasn't he enough for her? He gave everything to Lily. What else did she want? And so he left.

"I better go and talk to James. I said I would meet him in the Heads common room." Lily said apologetically and waved goodbye.

"Good luck." Remus called to her. She smiled.

Lily said the password and took a deep breath before pushing inside the common room. James was at the desk under the window, bent low over his book, scribbling furiously on a piece of parchment.

He looked up and glared at Lily. "What are you doing here?"

"I – I said I would meet you here." Lily said clueless, wondering why he was so angry. She put her books down on the couch and sat on the back of it, watching James.

"Wont Remus be missing you?" James growled.

Lily stared at him. "Remus – what?"

"Don't play dumb, Lily. Is one guy not enough for you? Do you need another one?" He snarled.

"James, I honestly don't know what you're talking about!" She said, raising her voice.

"Honesty... Isn't that what you're supposed to be in a relationship, not seeing other guys behind your boyfriends back?" James asked bitterly.

"I'm not seeing anyone else! Oh and coming from you; you couldn't even trust me with your little secret. You may not realise but it's a bit of a surprise when you find out your boyfriend is an Animagus!" Lily retorted.

"That's nothing. But seeing other people –,"

"I'm not seeing anyone else!" Lily shouted.

"So what was that in the library before, with Remus?" James challenged.

Lily gaped at him. "That – that was nothing! I was seeing how he was after last night. He felt terrible that he hurt you." She replied. She understood now why James was mad. He must've seen them holding hands. But it meant nothing.

"Yeah, right..." He says angrily. "And why were you crying?"

"Because of you!" She shouted. He flinched at her words. "I devote myself to you and you can't even trust me. Then you left me and my friends in Hogsmede, alone and cold and then you go galloping off with your little animal friends." She cried, a tear dripping off her chin. She was on her feet now, breathing heavily.

"What did you want me to do? Let a werewolf run loose in the village?" He asked sarcastically.

"Well, of course you shouldn't have but couldn't you have just dropped us a line? '_Stay here, I'll be back'_ or '_go to Hogwarts and get help'_. I was scared James," She barely whispered the last line.  
Lily sunk into the couch and cried into her hands. James came and sat next to her. He put one of his arms around her and Lily wanted so badly to just bury herself in his chest and cry until she couldn't anymore, but she was angry. How could he think she'd cheat on him? She shrugged off his arm and walked into her room, slamming the door behind her.

James put his head between his knees and rubbed his temples. He'd blown it. She was right. She wouldn't cheat on him, especially not with Remus. That'd be low. Besides, Remus knew how he felt about Lily.

The next morning at breakfast, Lily sat with Morgan and Louise, even though the Marauders were there. She kept her head down and tried to ignore them all. Luckily, everyone could tell she was upset and left her alone. Lily noticed how Louise had been cold towards her when she said hello. Even Morgan seemed distant. Why did everyone seem to hate her? She sniffed.  
James watched her the whole time, trying to figure her out. He tried to talk to her when she woke up but she didn't even look at him, she just walked out.

The post arrived and Effie dropped an envelope in front of Lily and then sipped her drink before flying out with the other owls. Morgan tried to read who it was from but Lily snatched it away. She read the address on the back.  
It was from Petunia.  
She never got mail from Petunia. What did she want?  
Lily tore it open and read the first line. She slapped a hand to her mouth and kept reading. The girls and the Marauders were watching curiously. Lily finished the letter and scrunched it up in her hand. James could see she was trying to fight back tears. Lily got up and ran out of the Great Hall, ignoring the people giving her odd looks.  
James went to get up and follow her but Remus put a hand on his shoulder and stopped him.

"She isn't exactly happy with you, mate. Let me talk to her." Remus gave him a small smile.

Both James and Louise crossed their arms, glaring at Remus as he left. Morgan would've followed Lily but she knew Louise was angry, so she stayed put.

Lily was already in the Heads common room crying on the couch when Remus knocked. Lily let him in and went back to curl up on the couch. He joined her and put a friendly arm around her. Lily noticed how good it felt to be held again. She usually didn't go an hour without an embrace from James. New tears leaked out thinking about him. She felt guilty that it was Remus holding her and not James, especially after what he said last night.

"What's wrong?" Remus asked softly.

"Everything." Lily sobbed dramatically.

"Start from the beginning." Remus suggested.

"Last night, James and I had a fight –,"

"I figured." Remus said.

"He seems to think you and I are – you know. He saw us in the library." Lily said awkwardly.

"Oh," Remus said, taking his arm off Lily. "Well, I hope you know that I don't like you in that way. Just friends."

"Of course. I feel the same way." Lily smiled.

"Thank Merlin. Things could've gotten very difficult very fast." Remus sighed in relief. They looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"So, what else?" Remus asked, wiping back his tears from laughing.

"I just got a letter from my sister. She said she's getting married and that – and that she doesn't want me there and – and she said to never speak to her again now that she was starting a '_new life'_." Lily tried to choke back her tears but they found their way out.

"That's horrible." Remus said.

Lily sighed. "Come on," she said, getting up, "Who cares? Anyway, we have classes so we should probably go."

Lily did care. After classes, the feast, rounds, studying and awkward encounters with James, Lily cried herself to sleep. Nothing was the same without James there to comfort her. So she relied on Remus to spill her feeling to. He quickly became her closest friend.


	17. Chapter 17 - His worst nightmare

**Chapter Seventeen **

Lily had been sitting in her bed for twenty minutes, trying to make herself get up and talk to James. She made up her mind that this couldn't go on any longer, especially when they were Head Girl and Boy.  
Although she cared for James deeply and missed him – oh how she missed him – his smell, their talks, his hugs. It was too difficult for her to continue in such an emotional relationship after she heard from petunia and he friends being angry at her for no apparent reason.  
She remembered only the other week they had their sleepover and Lily was thinking about how she loved James, but didn't know how to tell him. It seemed too late now. She wondered whether it would have made a difference if she had told him.

She reluctantly got up and opened the door. James was sitting at his desk. He has given up being angry at her and had taken the kind, patient approach like he did when he first asked her out this year.  
Lily saw James look up and smile. Her stomach flipped. She walked over and stood in front of him, refusing to return his smile.

"We need to talk." She said, betraying no hint of emotion.

His smile faltered. "Okay."

She left him over to the fire and took the armchair while he took the couch.

"Look, James –," she began.

"Wait, before you say anything, I have to say something." He said quickly. Lily didn't say anything so he continued. "I'm sorry I was stupid enough to think were seeing Remus behind my back. It was ridiculous. I realise now the kind of situation I put in that night at Hogsmede and I feel so irresponsible. I'm so sorry I lost my head and yelled at you. I know now that I should have told you about my Animagus form, I'll explain it all if you want me to. It just didn't that important at the time." James finished.

"I'm sorry too. I should have grown up and talked to you about but instead I was an idiot." Lily said.

James leaned over and held her hand. She didn't pull away, she just stared at them. At how perfectly they fit together.

"Are we good now? Can I kiss you?" James smiled mischievously.

Lily shook her head. "That's what I was going to say before. I – um – I just don't think I can do this anymore."

"What do you mean?" James asked, his eyes searching hers. They pleaded with her, telling her not to say what she was about to say. But she had to She was going crazy with all these emotions.

"I can't be with you anymore. I can't do it. I got this letter from Petunia and – and, well, you saw my reaction. All these pressures and feeling are weighing down on me and I can't handle it James. I just feel so depressed all the time. I'm sorry." Lily sobbed, tears free-falling from her eyes.

James dropped to his knees in front of her and wiped them away. "Lily, please don't do this to me. I need you. You are everything to me and I've worked my ass off for you and now that I have you, I don't plan on giving you up any time soon. I love you, Lily. I love everything about you, even when you hate me." He said desperately. He clutched her hands, bringing them to his chest.

Lily burst into tears. No one had ever said anything like that to her before. She loved him too but she couldn't do it. She needed a break.

She rested her forehead on his and whispered, "I love you, too." James' eyes shot up and looked straight into her eyes. "But I think we need a break." His eyes turned from hope to pain. He had never cried over a girl before but he thought he might now. It tore Lily's heart pout to say all that but it had to be done.

"I don't want it to be awkward, okay? Just remember I love you." Lily wasn't sure why she was trying to comfort him. It was all her fault he was looking so broken.

"But, you don't mean – you don't mean see other people, right?" James stuttered He wouldn't be able to bear it if she was someone else.

"Of course not. I couldn't do that. I would constantly be thinking of you." Lily smiled.

"Thank Merlin. I love you, Lily. So much it hurts." James told her, his voice hoarse. Lily sighed but didn't reply. If she said it again, she would probably give in and kiss him.

They got up and sat on the couch together, barely touching. "Lily?" He said quietly.

"Yes."

"Can I read the letter Petunia gave you?" James asked.

Lily nodded and took his hand, leading him into her room. James sat on her bed and waited for her to get the letter. He loved this room. It reminded him so much of Lily. She got the letter and handed it to him, sitting down opposite him. James unwrinkled the paper. It read:

_Dear Lily,_

_Mum wanted me to write and tell you that Vernon proposed to me last week. I preferred you didn't know but mum and dad insisted. We are getting married in three weeks and you are not invited. Forever I've been stuck in your shadow and now I'm starting a new life, so I think it's best we go our separate ways._

_Petunia._

James finished reading and looked up at Lily. She was crying again. "Oh, Lils." James sighed, taking her in his arms before she could protest. Lily sobbed into his shoulder. James' arms around her felt like home. She'd forgotten how strong and warm he was.

She looked up at him through her tears, sniffling. "Let's talk about something else."

"Okay, well, Ravenclaw beat Hufflepuff so that means we play them next week –," he began.

"Something other than Quidditch." Lily giggled. How did he always manage to make her laugh even when her heard felt like it was going to fail at any moment?

James grinned. "Well, how about we go and talk to McGonagall about out Halloween idea?" He suggested.

"Okay." She got up and wiped her eyes in the mirror.

"Lily, you look gorgeous as usual." James said, putting his arm around her waist.

"You seem to be the only one who thinks that." She rolls her eyes.

"That's because I'm completely in love with you."

She could see herself blushing in the mirror. Her plan to stop all the emotional stuff and snuggling with James didn't seem to be going very well. She supposed it was hard to resist the one you love.

"This is a wonderful idea as long as you manage it yourselves." Professor McGonagall was telling them.

"Yes, Professor." Lily and James said.

"I will supply you with some decorations; others can do with your wands. I will talk to the kitchens about cooking something extra special." McGonagall said.

"Thank you, Professor." Lily grinned.

"May I ask why two are not at Hogsmede?" McGonagall peered at them.

"I wasn't going to go because, well..." James trailed off. McGonagall watched him curiously.

"I forgot." Lily admitted. It had totally slipped her mind.

"You forgot, Miss Evans? You organise it." Professor McGonagall said, a hint of a smile on her face.

"I know, Professor. I've been a bit... out of sorts lately." Lily explained.

"I see," McGonagall raise an eyebrow. "I suggest you hurt if you want to go. You are dismissed."

Lily and James rose and exited McGonagall's office. James turned to Lily. "Want to go?"

"Sure. There's something I need to buy, actually." She said, taking James' hand. They hurried to the front door of Hogwarts and were able to catch up with the last few students.

"Did you say you were playing Ravenclaw next week?" Lily asked James.

"Yeah, why?" James asked curiously. Lily never showed any interest in Quidditch.

"Make sure you beat Alex for me." Lily grinned.

"What – he plays? What position?" James asked quickly.

"Seeker." Lily said simply.

James smiled darkly. "He's going to get what's coming to him. No one does that to my girl." He snarled.

"Your girl, am I?" Lily teased.

James smiled a lopsided grin and squeezed her hand. They continued down the path, James switching his hand from her hand to her waist.

"What's this about having a break?" James teased, hoping to make her laugh.

"Don't, James. It's not funny. I don't even know what I want anymore." She says, not smiling at all.

James stopped and turned to her. "I want you." He said.

Lily closed her eyes. It felt so good to hear him say those words, to be wanted. She didn't know why she was acting like this when she had just broken up with him. Lily kept walking, James catching up. He decided not to say anything, just in case.

"Where are the other Marauders?" Lily asked him, pretending nothing happened.

"They're probably here somehow." James shrugged. They kept walking until they finally entered Hogsmede. Last time Lily had been here it was dark and she was alone. She was glad to see that it was packed with people and the sun was shining.

As Lily and James walked down the main street to The Three Broomsticks, Lily asked, "Why weren't you going to go?"

"Because I didn't want to go without you." He said simply. Lily looked down and kept walking, ignoring the guilt. They made their way inside and ordered two butterbeer's and chose a seat in the far corner. Lily shivered.

"What's wrong?" James asked worriedly.

"This is where I sat with Alex." She mumbled.

"We can move if you want." He suggested.

She shook her head and smile. "I'm fine, it's okay."

Just then, Sirius and Remus entered, but no Peter. They made their way over to James and Lily.

"It's good to see you're talking again," said Sirius. He turned to Lily, "What did he have to do for you to say yes?"

Lily laughed as Remus shoved Sirius. "We're happy for you."

"We don't really want to see you guys all lovey-dovey so I'm off." Sirius exclaimed, dragging Remus with him.

Lily and James looked at each other and laughed. Their butterbeer's were served and they sipped quietly.  
Finally, James put his down and fixed his eyes on Lily. "Can you please reconsider what you said before? I can tell you're happier now that we're talking." He pleaded.

Lily looked down. "I don't want to talk about it right now." She said simply. James sat back grumpily and cross his arms. Lily drained the last bit of her butterbeer and laughed at James' expression. She got up and grabbed his bicep, feeling his muscle as she pulled him up.

"There's something I want to buy."

Lily led him down the street and into the dress shop where Morgan found the green dress Lily wanted. James followed moodily. He was finding it hard to be angry when Lily was obviously in such a happy mood.

"Come on, you moody teenager. Hold my bag while I get changed." Lily laughed, handing him her bag. James smiled a bit.

He waited a couple of minutes while Lily got changed into the green dress. He had to admit, it was a nice dress, not that he knew what he was talking about, but he was excited to see Lily in it.

She stepped out of the little booth and looked at James. She felt rather self-conscious with his eyes travelling all over her. His eyes widened as she spun in a circle, revealing the low-cut back. Lily stopped and flatted the front. It was a silk dress, right up the top around her bust and then flowed loosely from her hips down. It was just short enough to show off the gold heels she found in the change room.

"What do you think?" Lily asked uncertainly.

James hadn't said a word. He stood up and walked over to her, placing a hand on the hollow of her back. Lily could feel his warm hand on her skin. It sent tingles through her body. His other hand was on her hip. She was pulled in close, legs connects, hips connected and chests connected. His face was right in front of hers.

"I think I'm holding the sexiest girl I've ever." He whispered huskily, making her shiver. Being this close drove Lily crazy.  
James was bending low over her, not breaking eye contact, about to kiss her. She beat him to it. She tilted her head up and kissed him on the lips. She stood on her toes to get closer and kiss him harder. She put her arms around his neck. He answered by holding her tighter and opening his mouth slightly, inviting her in. She kissed him deeper, opening her mouth too.  
She was in heaven.  
They broke apart, panting heavily. Lily could still taste his lips. They smiled at each other. Lily gave him another quick kiss before fucking behind the curtain, getting changed back into her skirt and top.

Lily emerged and took James' hand. "Do you know what I think?" She said.

"What's that?" James grinned.

"That I made the biggest mistake of my life breaking up with you. There were so many bad feeling in me and I got rid of the only happy one. And I'm sorry. I love you, James Potter." She turned to James and he gathered her in his arms.

"Thank God," he breathed, closing his eyes. "You know what I think?" James said, opening his eyes and looking right into Lily's mesmerising green eyes.

"What's that?" She laughed.

"That I love you."

"I love you, too." Lily grinned. James picked up bridal-style and carried her all the way back to Hogwarts, laughing , where they fell asleep together on the couch, Lily on top of his chest.

If this wasn't heaven then what is?


	18. Chapter 18 - Masquerade Ball

**Chapter Eighteen**

Lily straightened up and rubbed her lower back. She bent back down and started pushing the table again. Lily had been in the Great Hall for the last three hours, giving it a complete make-over. At first it had been fine. She had been enjoying hanging things and conjuring up new ideas she thought would look great.  
All until she cracked it at James for annoying her while she was concentrating. At that point, Lily had started getting rather stressed out. James decided it would be fun to take Lily's wand, it an attempt to loosen her up but it only made her angrier.  
She ran after James, trying to get her wand back but she had a big disadvantage, all of which included him being taller, faster and fitter. She eventually gave up, screamed at him and continued preparing the muggle way. That's what had left her to the deep aching pain in her lower back. Not to mention the knot that was forming in her neck.

Suddenly, pair of warm firm hands were on her shoulders, massaging her muscles. She knew it was James. He went up her neck and then back down, along her shoulders and down her arms, his strong hands finally making their way down her back. He spread his fingers over her hips and massaged the hollow of her back with his thumbs. Lily moaned and let out a long breath. James was quite enjoying himself too.  
Lily turned to him slowly, linking her arms around his neck. He put his arms around her too. She saw and chance and took it, plunging her hand into his back pocket and stealing her wand back.

"Ha!" Lily cried in triumph.

"What –?" James began but Lily quickly whipped her wand and sent a Full body Bind spell at him. His arms snapped to his sides and James slid to the ground.

Lily loomed over him. "How many times do I have to tell you not to underestimate me?" She smirked, turned around to face the Hall and put her hands on her hips.

There wasn't much to do. All the tables had been moved to the side and were decorated with hold and black plates, goblets and unique ornaments to liven up the Hall. The walls were draped in gold hangings and everything seemed to glitter. Lily stuck her wands in her pocket and dusted off her clothes. She was very proud of her handiwork.

She turned back to James. "Do you think you can behave now? Because I don't mind binding you again, you're much cuter when you're silent." Lily knew James couldn't move or talk but she liked taunting him anyway. She lifted the spell and stuck her hands out for him to take.  
He took it, but instead of pulling himself up, he pulled her down with him. She squealed as she landed on his chest.

"I'm sorry," James said, flipping her over and covering her body with his. "But no one binds me."

Lily giggled, realising how close James was, pinning her arms above her head. Lucky o none was in the Hall with them; she didn't fancy getting caught like this. They were in the middle of a raised platform Lily had created as the dance floor. Her heart race picked up and she had a hard time catching her breath while looking up into James' eyes. She could smell it again; peppermint. How did he make himself smell so good? Lily would've scrambled up, embarrassed, but James had other ideas.

He bent down further, releasing on of Lily's arms and using is spare hand to pull her closer. His lips met hers half-way, warm and soft. She placed her hand on the back of his neck and arched her back. He kisses always began soft and delicate, then slowly became desperate, hungry. Lily didn't mind. Every aspect of James seemed appealing at the moment. She couldn't get enough.

James pulled back and smiled at Lily, running his thumb over her cheek and across her bottom lip. He climbed off her slowly, lying on his side next to her, fiddling with her hair. Lily stayed on her back, staring up at the roof. She lay there and remembered is touch. She subconsciously licked her lips. She turned her head on the side and kissed his nose, getting up and straightening her top that James had somehow managed to pull up.

She imagined how much further they would have gone if James hadn't stopped. Now that she thought about it, she would'nt mind if it was James. At the start of the year, the only thing she imagined doing to him was throwing him in the Black Lake with the Giant Squid. Now she was imagining how much further she would like to go with him. She shook her head. She was seventeen; she reminded herself, maybe next year.

"We did well, Lils." James said, admiring the work they had done. He checked his watch. They had another three hours until the Ball started.

"_We? _You mean the work _I _did?" She corrected. James shook his head and laughed. They walked out of the Great Hall together.

The week had been pretty average. Lily dad the usual; go to class, study, rounds, snuggle with James. The only different thing was that Louise and Morgan weren't talking to her and she wanted to know why.

"We still have time for a walk before the Ball." James suggested to Lily.

"I cant, sorry. I have to get ready." She told him.

"You're going to take _three hours_ to get ready? Why in the name of Merlin do you need that long?" James gaped.

"Well, it takes a while. Besides, I have to talk to Louise." She added.

"Oh yeah, what happened with you two?" James asked concern in his eyes. He could tell Lily had seemed lonelier without the other girls. He was always there with her but she needed Morgan and Louise.

"I have no idea, that's what I'm going to find out." Lily said, kissing him and walking off.

Lily found Louise sitting in the corner of the library behind a pile of books. She stood at the door before taking a deep breath and entering.

"Hello," Lily said awkwardly, approaching the table.

"Oh, hi." She said quickly, looking up at Lily.

"I wanted to talk." Lily said quietly, taking the seat next to Louise.

Louise nodded so Lily continued, "Well, I noticed you haven't been quite happy with my lately and I'm really sorry but... I have no idea why." She said.

"You know I like Remus, right?" Louise said slowly, not looking up from her parchment.

"Yeah..." Lily said, sensing where this was going.

"I – well, I saw you two in the library. I mean, I don't mind if you like but I thought – you know, you and James were together. Don't worry, I won't tell –," Louise rushed before Lily cut her off.

"Louise! You know I don't like Remus. Even if I did, I wouldn't go out with him. James thought I was too, that's why were fighting. I was just seeing if Remus was okay after – you know, last week." She added the last bit quietly.

Louise face grew into a smile, relief etched onto her face. "Oh good, because – you know – I thought –,"

"No, no, no. Never." Lily said. The girls smiled at each other before pulling each other into a hug.

"So are you going with Remus tonight?" Lily asked.

"Well, no." Louise blushed.

"Why not? Please ask him. I know he will say yes." Lily begged.

The girl shrugged. Lily grabbed her arm and pulled her up. "Come on, we're going to find Remus."

On the other side of Hogwarts, James was having the same conversation with Remus.

"Come on, mate. I guarantee you she'll say yes." James assured him. They were sitting in the Gryffindor common room. Remus was pretending to be busy reading a book.

"Prongs, she can hardly look at me after last week." Remus said sadly.

"That's because you're avoiding each other because you both know you like each other!" James pressed.

Remus shook his head. James didn't understand. He didn't have to go through the painful transformation each month; he wasn't shunted and judged because of his condition. He was funny and confident and brave; everyone liked him.

James snatched the book away from Remus and threw it over his head. "Five Galleons says Louise is on her way here to talk to you right now."

Remus chuckled, knowing it was impossible. "Fine," he said shaking hands with James.

The two boys sat back in their chairs, waiting. Remus knew this was a waste of time. Louise was never going to come. James on the other hand was staring at the door, waiting for her to come. He had a feeling.

The portrait hole opened and in come a nervous Louise, being frog-marched by Lily. James and Lily grinned at each other. The beauty was that this was totally not planned at all.

"Pay up," James said, nudging Remus.

He shook his head. "You definitely set this up."

"No we actually didn't!" James and Lily said in unison. Lily pushed Louise on the chair next to Remus and took James' hand.

"Come on James, we have stuff to do." Lily said, leaving a very awkward Louise and Remus behind.

James and Lily walked back to the Heads common room and hi-fived.

"Well, I have to get ready." She said, kissing James and walking into her room. She had only just taken her clothes off and was slipping on the dress when James knocked on her door.

"Lily?" He called through the door.

"What, James? I don't have any clothes on." She called back.

"Thanks for that lovely mental picture." James said. Lily could almost hear him smirking. She threw a shoe at the door.

She heard him laugh. "Louise and Morgan are here."

"Coming!" She quickly grabbed a towel to rap around herself. Lily opened the door and the first thing she saw was a blur of blonde hair. Morgan flung her arms around Lily.

"What are you doing here?" Lily asked laughing.

Morgan pulled back and held up a bag, as did Louise. "We are here to prepare."

"I'll just... leave." James said slowly.

Lily walked over and gave him a soft but long kiss on the lips. "Sorry, I'll meet you outside the Great Hall at seven. Love you." She whispered.

James grinned. "I love you, too." He winked at her and grabbed a coat hanger with a plastic wrapper hanging on it that was hiding something inside. Lily supposed that was his tuxedo. He threw it over his shoulder before waving and leaving.

"Did I just hear you whisper _I love you_?" Morgan squealed.

Lily shook her head. "You have so much to catch up on. Let's get started."


	19. Chapter 19 - Everyone Comes Together

**Chapter Nineteen**

Louise zipped up the back of Lily's dress and turned her around to face the full-body length mirror on the back of her wardrobe. Lily grinned at herself in the mirror and twirled; letting the bottom of the dress float up like the picture of Marilyn Munroe she had her in room at home. Lily felt amazing in this dress. It wasn't too low at the front, just low enough to prove that she was definitely not flat-chested. The gold sequined and studded heels she wore made her legs look extra-long. Lily still had to do her hair so she sat on a stool in front of Morgan and Louise, ready to go.  
Lily had already helped the two girls get dressed. Morgan was wearing a long, flowing strapless black dress with a silver sequined band around the middle. She also wore a half gold, half black mask, detailed with swirls like waves coming from the sides. Her hair was twirled and twisted into a curly side bun behind her ear.  
Louise was wearing a light aqua dress that flowed down to her feet. Her dress was also strapless and the whole chest was covered in tiny, sparkling jewels. She'd straightened as much of her short black hair as she could with style mouse and had twisted the front part back away from her face. Louise's mask was white and kind of cat-like with a single feather up the side and black detail on the opposite side.

The two girls finished Lily's hair and smiled at her. They had twisted her hair up, tying it into a ponytail. It tumbled down to the middle of her back and swished around when she walked. The girls all looked at each other and squealed.

"I love your dress!" "Your hair is amazing." "Oh my God, your mask is perfect."

Somehow, despite how early they started, the girls were running late. So when they walked to the Great Hall, there were only a couple of people waiting outside. Poor Sirius and Morgan had no date. Lily knew Sirius didn't care but Morgan did, even though she claimed not to. She had a sneaky suspicion that the two would end up dancing together.

As they rounded the corner and saw the Marauders, leaning against the wall with their hands in their pockets, Lily felt so nervous she was scared she was going to trip. Her knees wobbled as the three of them stopped in front of the boys, grinning.

Remus had a dark grey/brown mask with scruffy ears – a werewolf. Sirius has a fluffy black mask – a dog. And James had a light brown mask with antlers – a stag. His eyes widened as they found Lily. He had never seen such a gorgeous creature in his life.

The girls burst out laughing when they saw the boys in their masks.

"What, don't like 'em?" Sirius grinned.

"No, no. They – uh – suit you very well." Morgan said, stifling a laugh.

Lily walked over to James and stood on her toes to kiss him. He bent low and whispered in her ear. "You look beautiful." He twirled his finger in her hair.

"Thank you. You don't wash up too bad yourself." She whispered back. He did look pretty good in his black tuxedo, complimenting his long legs and broad shoulders.

Louise walked to Remus and smiled shyly. He picked up her hand and kissed it. Morgan and Sirius stood next to each other awkwardly, watching the others. Remus, feeling particularly bold, slipped an arm around Louise's waist.

The six of them entered the Great Hall and looked around. Louise and Morgan gasped and turned to James and Lily.

"This looks great, you two." Morgan said. James and Lily grinned proudly. A waiter in a blue suit with the Hogwarts crest appeared in front of them holding a clipboard.

"Hi, Stuart." Lily said, greeting the sixth-year Prefect.

"Good evening. A table for six?" He asked.

Lily nodded. "Oh and plus another one actually." She said, thinking of Peter. She didn't know if he was coming though.

"For who?" James asked.

"Peter. He's coming, right?" Lily said, following Stuart to a large round table at the right side of the dance floor. They took their seats; Lily, James, Sirius, Morgan, Remus and then around to Louise who was next to Lily.

"Peter isn't coming - said he's got a detention or something." Sirius said dismissively.

Lily shrugged and looked down at the menu. Everyone else besides her and James looked confused. "How do we order?" Sirius asked.

"Haven't you read _Hogwarts: A history_?" She asked.

"Um – no, of course not. No one has besides you." Sirius smirked.

"Well, I didn't expect you to, Sirius, that'd be going against your whole I'm-too-good-for-reading theory." Lily said. She didn't mean it seriously, so when he retorted rudely, she didn't expect it.

"Yeah well, how's your '_Oh James, I don't want to be with you because I'm so emotional. Wait, I love you, don't leave me' _theory going?" He said, imitating Lily in a high voice.

It was like he'd slapped her in the face. She started at him. How did he know about that? James must've told him. It really hit her hard. Is that what they thought of her – some sort of emotionally unstable person? She felt somewhat betrayed. Didn't it seem obvious to James that it was a personal thing? She looked around at them. They all had their hands down, not wanting to catch her eye. She sniffed, trying to ignore her eyes burning with tears.

"James." She barely whispered.

He looked up. "I'm sorry, Lily. You know I tell Sirius everything. I didn't think it mattered now..."

"It mattered to me. What do you think everyone else will think of me now? That I'm some stupid little girl –," she began.

"We don't think that, Lils. We know you're not." Louise said softly.

A lump rose in Lily's throat. She blinked back the tears and hid behind her menu. Once James explained to everyone how to order, their plates were filled with different and extravagant foods. Lily was still trying to keep herself together while she was eating. Her brain kept replaying what Sirius said and that night with James. Now, a week later, she realised how much of a mistake it was. The only good thing was that they were finally able to tell each other how much they loved one another.  
James saw a lone tear travel down Lily's cheek. He slowly rubbed her bare back while no one was watching. The others at the table continued laughing and joking while Lily kept her head down. They had finished their dinner and were talking when Dumbledore rose and everyone fell silent.

"If everyone will please put your hands together for the Head Boy and Girl who have created this magnificent event." He said. Everyone clapped loudly, looking at Lily and James. Some people even whistled and cheered. No matter how hurt she was, Lily couldn't help smiling.

"Now for a dance," Dumbledore said happily, leading Professor McGonagall to the dance floor. The music started playing, not a slow song but slow enough that it was still classed as formal dancing. The dance floor quickly filled with students doing stupid dances, trying to imitate Dumbledore.  
Remus took Louise's hand and pulled her onto the dance floor. Lily watched them longingly, wanting to have an innocent relationship like theirs. Even Sirius got up and held a hand out to Morgan. She rolled her eyes and muttered, "Eh, what the hell," before taking his hand and following him.  
James saw the look in Lily's eyes and so desperately wanted to dance with her but he had a feeling she wouldn't be so willing. He tried anyway.

He stood up and offered his hand. "Shall we show them how it's done?" He asked hopefully.

Lily could see how much he wanted to. All she wanted to do was take off this ridiculous dress and curl up in front of the fire, all by herself. She looked at James' hand and then back up to his eyes through the mask. She rubbed her temples, and then finally decided to take his hand and follow him to the dance floor.

The slow song ended as soon as they got there. Now came on a fast paced song. All around them people were dancing, spinning around, jumping up and down. James grinned at Lily before taking her hand and spinning her close, then spinning her out again. Lily laughed as she danced with James and at his stupid head-banging moves. Lily had her arms up, twirling her body from side to side, moving with the music. The music stopped and Lily and James laughed at each other, breathing heavily.

"I'll get us something to drink." James told her, kissing her on the cheek. As soon as James left, someone grabbed her arm and pulled her away from the crowd to the back of the Great Hall and out of sight. She struggled to get out of the persons grip but she failed. She looked up at the man in a black tailcoat and black mask. She could recognise those hollow black eyes anywhere.

"Severus?"

James returned with their drinks and scanned the floor for her. Lily wasn't there. He looked over the crowd to their table but she wasn't there either. He found Louise and Morgan but they hadn't seen her either. Just then Sirius came panting behind him with Remus.

"Prong – we – she, I mean Lily – he –," Sirius gasped but bent over trying to catch his breath.

"We saw someone drag Lily over there," Remus finished, pointing to the very back of the Great Hall.

"Hold these." James said, giving the drinks to Sirius.

He pushed through the crowd, past the teachers on the long table to the left and strode over to the back of the Great Hall. Just as he got close enough, he saw man dressed in all black pull Lily into a rough kiss. Something snapped inside him that made him storm right up to the moron, pull him away and give him a hard blow to the jaw. James rubbed his knuckles as the man stumbled back. He saw a hooked nose, greasy hair and cold black eyes.

_Snape._

"Snivellus," James growled. "You're lucky I don't have my wand with me, I would've done much worse than that."

Lily stared at the two boys and Severus straightened again, rubbing his jaw. Before James had time to register what he was doing, Severus sent a jet of purple light streaking towards James. Lily whipped her wand out and reflected the curse in three seconds. People always underestimated her wand skills. Severus looked startled at Lily's speed as she stepped between them.

"That's enough." She said sternly to them both. She turned to Snape. "Sod off, Severus." He stood there and glared at James, contemplating whether or not to try and curse him again. Finally, Snape swished his tailcoat and stormed off.

"Are you okay?" James asked Lily. She sighed and nodded, walking off. James followed. She wasn't exactly aware of where she was going. Severus just kissed her and she couldn't figure out why. He had been so cold towards her ever since last year. It just didn't make sense

A slow song was playing now and only the actual couples were on the raised dance floor. Lily was on her way back to their table when James snagged her arm and pulled her in for a dance. She gave in and put her head on James' chest, letting a small sob escape. James put his arms around her and simply held her close, rocking from side to side. Lily looked up at James and put her arms around his neck. They looked into each other's eyes as they danced. Lily got lost in them, forgetting where they were.

James tucked a stray hair behind her ear and bent low, kissing her lips. Lily kissed back. His lips were so smooth and tasted so good. She pressed harder and pulled herself in close. They pulled back when they could no longer breathe.

"I love you." She whispered against his ear.

James removed his arms from around her and cupped her face. "I love you, too. Promise you'll never leave me." He whispered back.

"Promise," she replied, burying her face in his neck. They swayed together to the music, kissing every now and then.

A couple of people over stood Louise and Remus, close together like Lily and James. Remus was trying to think of a way to tell Louise how much he liked her, but how it would be difficult to be together because of his... fury little problem.

"Louise." He said quietly, looking down.

"Yes?" She replied, looking up.

"I just want you to know that I think you're amazing. You're funny, smart, kind and beautiful, but I thought I should let you know it's not going to be easy because of my, you know –," He began.

Louise lifted his face with her hands. "I don't care about that. As long as I'm with you, I'm happy." She smiled.

Their faces were only centimetres apart. Remus closed the distance by kissing her full, warm lips. Louise wrapped her arms around him so they were closer. Every part of her body was touching his. He put a hand on her cheek, kissing her passionately. He had always stopped himself going out with a girl, knowing that she would eventually find out about him. But he never imagined it would be this good to hold someone and kiss them.

Lily and James grinned at each other, watching Remus and Louise kiss. "This was the greatest idea ever." James whispered to Lily. "Look at Padfoot and Morgan even." He pointed to somewhere behind Lily and she turned, looking over her shoulder to see Morgan and Sirius making out quite heavily, clearly not giving a damn that there were teachers around. Lily giggled just as the song ended. The six of them walked back to the table, the girls and the boys in separate huddles.

"Morgan!" Louise and Lily exclaimed.

"What?" She grinned.

"We saw you and Sirius!" Lily laughed.

"Yeah and I saw you two." She replied, laughing.

James nudged Remus. "Good on ya, Moony."

Remus grinned. "You too. And you, Padfoot."

"Yeah, Padfoot. Didn't know you two were an item?" James winked.

"If you haven't noticed, she's damn fine." Sirius said grinning.

The six of them sat down and looked at each other awkwardly, at lost for words before bursting into laughter. Everyone was giddy with excitement. All these relationships starting - no one expected Morgan and Sirius.

"We're off." James said, getting up and taking Lily's hand.

"Have fun!" Lily smiled at the others. She and James wanted to be alone, so they left and walked back to the Heads common room. They said the password and entered, sitting on the couch in front of the fire.

Lily pulled her heels off and slipped her mask off as well. James took his off too, putting it next to Lily's on the table. Lily nestled her head on James' shoulder and relaxed her muscles, melting into him.

"You were easily the best dressed there, Lil." He said.

Lily laughed. "You're always the best looking everywhere. And thank you." She replied.

"And I'm really sorry about Sirius. I don't know why he got so offended. I didn't know he would say that. I told him not to speak of it." James apologized.

"Don't worry about it. He was right, I was such an idiot –,"

"No you weren't," he said, turning her head to face him. "You weren't an idiot. You were entitled to feel that way. I understand."

Lily was so grateful; she kissed him so passionately that James had to lay back. He kissed back just as hard. Lily crawled on top of him and opened her mouth, sliding her tongue against his. James ran his hands down her back, along her shoulders and down her bare back. His hands stopped just before he went any further and found the zip, unzipping her dress.

Lily was hit by a wave of tingles as James' fingers brushed the back of her thighs. She started on the buttons of his tuxedo jacket. James sat up a bit, helping Lily take it off. Next she began on the buttons of his shirt as James slipped the straps of her dress and bra off her shoulders. Lily ripped his shirt off, still not breaking the kiss and ran her hands up his lean stomach and chest.

As James pushed Lily's dress down further, she realised where this was going. She really wanted it, but thought it better to stop. She pulled back, a hand on either side of James, holding herself up.

"I'm – I'm sorry. I think we should stop." She said quietly and awkwardly.

"It's okay." He answered, sitting up.

James picked up his shirt and put it back on, leaving the buttons undone. Lily held the front her dress up, hiding the front of her body. Her bra straps were still hanging off her shoulders and her hair was a mess. She stepped closer and put a hand on his chest, leaning up to kiss him but he stopped her.

"One day will we be able to – you know –," He asked quietly.

Lily looked down and then back up. "Yes, of course. I just – I just don't think I'm ready right now." She answered. James nodded and took her hand, leading her over to their doors.

Lily looked at him. "Can I stay with you?"

"Of course you can." He said.

"I'll just get changed." She told him. She ducked into her room and grinned to herself. That felt amazing, but what scared her was where they were going. She had never done anything with a guy before. She kind of panicked. It just sort of hit her, what would've happened if she hadn't said anything?

Lily got changed into her long pyjama pants and singlet. She knocked on James' door and entered. He was wearing just a pair of red boxer shorts and was standing over his desk.

"Do you always sleep with no shirt on?" She laughed.

James looked up. "What, I thought you liked my body?" He grinned.

Lily rolled her eyes and made her way over to James' bed but he beat her to it. He fell onto his bed, dragging her down with him. She fell on top of him and pulled the covers up over them.

"I love you." He mumbled against the skin of her neck.

Lily kissed his forehead. "I love you, too."

They snuggled close together, legs and arms tangled. Lily was shivering at first but she warmed the instant James kissed her.

He fiddled with her hair. "You have no idea how much I love you hair."

"You have no idea how much I love your eyes.

"I love your everything." He mumbled.

"Well, everything about you used to piss me off. Now it's all just so damn sexy." She said seductively.

James laughed at her choice of words. "I'm sorry I was such a jerk for all those years. I actually did like you ever since our third year; I just didn't know how to show it."

"I apologise too. But that doesn't matter anymore, we're together and I love you and that's all I need." She kissed his jaw and then his lips. She buried herself again and fell asleep.


	20. Chapter 20 - Betrayal

**Chapter Twenty**

Lily woke that Monday morning to a loud ringing filling her ears. As her brain became more aware of her surroundings, the ringing noise slowly transformed into a steady beeping. She sat up and rubbed her eyes, squinting in the brightness. Lily heard a groan next to her and she remembered she was in James' bed.  
She located the irritating beeping noise and discovered James' clock on his bedside table, its numbers flashing red. Why the hell was it going off at _8:00am? _Lily cursed, remembering it was Monday and they had classes. She hung her head, detesting the thought of leaving James' warm bed. But she couldn't go back to sleep, so she got up grudgingly and bent over James.  
She placed her hands on his arm and shoulder, shaking him to wake him up. James groaned again and reached over to his bedside table, picking up his wand. He flicked it and immediately the beeping noise stopped. James buried himself under the covers.

"I don't think so," Lily said, pulling the covers out of his grip. "Get up!" James sat up grumpily and watched Lily bustle around the room, opening the curtains.

"Come on, Lil, just ten more minutes." James pleaded. Lily shook her head.

"No, because that ten will turn into twenty and then thirty and so on. I am not missing breakfast." She stated. When James ignored her and pulled the pillow over his head, Lily picked up his wand and chimed, "Aguamenti!" sending water splashing over him. James shrieked and jumped out bed, cursing.

"What the bloody hell was that for?" He exclaimed, throwing his hands up. Lily watched smugly, pleased with herself. She put his wand down and left.

"You better be ready when I come back." She said smiling over her shoulder, knowing that he definitely wouldn't be going back to bed now.

Lily got dressed into her uniform slowly, then tried to tame her bed hair. She was still a bit groggy after last night. She grinned, remembering certain events that happened on their couch.  
After packing all her homework into her bag and checking her hair, Lily walked back out to James' room and knocked before answering. He wasn't in there, but Lily could hear the water running in his bathroom. Thinking that James was cutting it very fine, Lily left a note on his bed before leaving.

_Gone down to breakfast, see you in potions.  
I love you,_

_Lily._

She bounded down to breakfast, happy to some extent until she saw Sirius, remembering what he had said last night. She scowled but joined them anyway, seeing ads Morgan and Louise were there. Louise was sitting next to Remus with his arm wrapped around her waist. Morgan was next to Sirius, his arm around her shoulders, listening to something he was whispering to her. Lily suspected it was about her, because as she sat down, Sirius stopped whispering and Morgan looked at her nervously.

"Hi everyone," she said awkwardly, feeling like the third-wheel. Well, the fifth-wheel in this case. She wished James were here, he always knew what to do in awkward setting.  
She ate her breakfast quickly; eager to get out of there and leave, even though she would be way early for Potions. But as she arrived at the Potions classroom, she noticed she wasn't the only one there early.  
Severus Snape stood there, hugging his books to his chest, kicking at the floor. He didn't seem to notice that Lily was standing at the end of the corridor, watching him. She contemplated walking up to the classroom and pretending he wasn't there. She still had some hope that he wasn't as bad as everyone said he was. She thought that maybe if the other Slytherins and James weren't around, he might be different.  
She shook her head and reminded herself the he was a Death Eater, apparently, and no matter how nice he used to be, he had changed. Just as she turned to leave, he spoke.

"Don't leave." He said, his voice echoing down the corridor to her. She stood still, her back to him. She really wanted to just keep walking and act as though she hadn't heard him, but he didn't seem like he wanted to cause trouble. Maybe he just wanted to talk... She turned and walking to him slowly.

"Snape." She said coolly, not giving anything way. Snape looked at her sadly, almost pityingly. She couldn't understand why.

"I – um – how have you been?" He asked oddly, stumbling on his words. Lily cocked an eyebrow, wondering whether she should answering, wondering if he actually cared how she was doing.

"What do you want, Snape?" She tried to ask as firmly as she could, but her voice faltered. She wasn't actually angry at him, but they were enemies after all.

"Nothing, nothing. I'm just here, you know, because we have Potions." He said clumsily. "You dint have to leave just because I'm here." He started at his feet and shrugged his shoulders.

"Well, usually that's exactly the reason I'd leave." Lily snapped, not knowing why she was being so bitter. He hadn't done anything this morning... yet. "You know, after being called a mud-blood by you and your little friends countless times, forgive me for being a little cold."

"Yeah, about that. Lily, look, I'm really sorry about all this and if you let me explain –," Snape began, before being cut off by a cold voice coming from the end of the hallway.

"What are you doing, Snivellus?" The voice snarled. Lily whipped around and saw James walking towards them. Okay, she wasn't expecting hat. She had hardly recognised his voice. It had sounded so hard and cold, like ice.

"Having a tea party with your girlfriend, Potter." Severus replied sarcastically, his voice dripping with malice. Lily rolled her eyes at them. They were at it again, just as Lily had started a civilised conversation. Severus had actually called her Lily again, he was starting to apologise, that had never happened before. Well, once when they were still friends and it was a petty fight but mot since they had declared themselves as enemies.  
James was heading straight for Severus, but Lily put a hand on his chest and then slipped her other hand into his. Severus stiffened and his features darkened as he saw this, but Lily didn't notice.

"We were just talking, James." She told him sternly, giving him a look that clearly told him to back off. James' eyes still hadn't left Snape and they weren't going to anytime soon.

"That's right, Potter. You better listen to the Mudblood." Snape snarled. Lily wheeled around and stared at him. Three seconds ago he was apologising and now this. She should have known he hadn't changed.  
Lily saw James take his wand out and didn't even attempt to stop him. She didn't care anymore. She was hurt and couldn't care less what happened to Snape. But James didn't hex him or curse him or anything, he just stared daggers at him. Lily looked back to Severus.

"I-I don't understand." She said quietly, trying to stop the tears. She shouldn't let him affect her so much. She missed the old Sev that used to be her friend and now he had turned into the cold, malicious man in front of her. "We were just talking and you were apologising –,"

"You were trying to apologise?" James laughed darkly. "You've got nerve, Snape."

"Shut it, Potter." Snape glared at James. He pulled out his wand and set a jet of purple light towards James, a non-verbal spell. James didn't know what spell he had used and hoped that he would be able to reflect it with a simple Shield charm. It wouldn't be anything bad enough to break through that, would it?  
But luckily for James, the spell just bounded right off his shield. Lily stared between the two of them, wondering whether she should get involved or stay out of it. She was angry at the both of them. Snape, obviously because he has just called her a Mudblood and James because he had started an unnecessary fight as usual.

Just in time, old and round Professor Slughorn rounded the corner, coming into view. Lily saw James and Snape quickly stow their wands away before Slughorn could see. The Professor smiled cheerfully as he waddled up to them.

"Good morning. Splendid day, isn't it? Where are your other classmates?" Slughorn asked just as a whole group of Slytherins and Gryffindor came, clutching their bags, ready for class. Slughorn opened the door and let everyone in. James and Lily took a seat at the back, later joined by Sirius and Remus next to them. Peter, Morgan and Louise sat in the chair in front of them.

"_What was that?"_ Lily hissed at James, leaning closer to him so that no one could hear them.

"What?" James asked innocently, leaning closer too.

Lily rolled her eyes. "You know what I'm talking about. Was that really necessary?" She asked him in an angry whisper.

"He called you that word again, what else was I supposed to do?" James said indigently. Lily was grateful that he cared so much but honestly, he didn't have to be so extreme.

"I know, but you could just ignore it like I do. Besides, I was talking about before that. You shouldn't have started it in the first place. We really were _just _talking." She whispered back.

Luckily for James, he was saved answering when Slughorn started ordering to get their books out. Normally James couldn't care less about talking in class but he really had no answer so he just shrugged apologetically and started getting his books out. Lily scowled and opened her books too.

Lily copied down the recipe and began on the potion, doing her best to ignore James. Her efforts were wasted when Slughorn instructed everyone to pair up with the person sitting to their left, which was unfortunately James. He winked at her and they started their incredibly frustrating task. Lily was relieved when she checked her timetable at the end of the lesson and saw that her next subject was Arithmacy, which James didn't take, only Remus and a few others.

Lily and Remus walked to the Arithmacy classroom together, talking politely about a poring subject when Lily decided to ask what had been weighing on her mind all day.

"Why is it that James hates Severus? I mean, ever since firs year they've hated each other and as far as I know, Severus did nothing wrong." Lily asked. She didn't know why she still defended Severus after all these years.

Remus hesitated before answering. "I think there were a couple of reasons but the main two are; that James naturally hates anyone involved in the Dark Arts." He started to explain.

"But how did James _actually_ know how he was involved in Dark Arts? I didn't and he was my best friend." Lily asked as they climbed a few more steps. Lily wanted proof that it was just some petty, stupid childhood rivalry so they could all just get over it!

"Well, you see, Lily." Remus started. "We Marauders get around a lot and ah – we see things." He said shortly, purposely not elaborating any further. Lily was going to press him on exactly what he meant but she could tell Remus wouldn't say anything more.

"And the second reason?" Lily asked, entering the Arithmacy classroom and sitting with Remus.

"I think, around our third year when James actually started to fancy you, he was jealous of your friendship and how Snape got to spend so much time with you." Remus finished quietly, giving Lily a small smile.

"Oh." She said quietly. She hadn't quite thought of it that way. She imagined now, if James had a really close friend that was a girl, Lily would be a little angry and jealous. She could understand where James was coming from but it still didn't make any of it okay.

Lily breezed through Arithmacy, Defense Against the Dark Arts and Transfiguration fairly easily, although she was slightly distracted. She put most of her effort into avoiding James for the day. She wasn't even sure why she was going it. Maybe it was to show him that she was angry and disappointed. Maybe she hoped he would stop. Yeah right... she thought to herself as she made her way back to the Heads rooms to drop off her bag.

As she entered the portrait hole she froze, her heart sinking, hoping the scene in front of her wasn't real. James was sitting on the couch with a cute Hufflepuff girl, too close for Lily's liking.  
The girl had her hand on James' thigh and she was giggling flirtatiously. They hadn't noticed Lily was standing there. Her heart pounded and she could feel something bubbling in the pit of her stomach. Lily swallowed and cleared her throat. She put her hands on her hips and tried to look unaffected by the scene in front of her.  
James' head whipped around and he jumped up, separating himself from the girl, as though hoping Lily hadn't seen them together.

"Don't let me interrupt you." Lily said, giving the girl a plastic smile and sending James the dirtiest look she could muster. She readjusted the bag on her should and stormed into her room.

"Lily!" She heard James call before slamming the door in his face. She locked the door with her wand before he could enter and threw herself onto her bed. She felt betrayed, unwanted, shattered, broken, every word she could possibly think of. Was she not enough for him? Was she that bad the he needed another girl's affection? She tried to stop herself form crying, knowing that she shouldn't was a tear on _him_. There was a deep, dull and gnawing pain chipping away at her heart. She had loved him so deeply and he had just thrown it away, in the trash, down the train.  
She chocked on a sob as she heard James knocking on her door, pleading for her to let him explain. She didn't understand why he didn't just use his wand to open the door. Maybe he didn't have it on him. Maybe he was just an idiot...

"Leave me alone!" She screamed at the door, getting up and pacing the room, hoping that this would stop the tears. How could he not tell that that girl was all over him? It was sickening to have to see.

She walked over to the calendar and checked this month, hoping to distract herself and with a pang in her stomach, she read that tomorrow was Petunia's wedding – the 16th of November. How could she forget? Now Lily had another thing to brood over. Wow, God really hated her. Lily had thought about turning up at Petunia's wedding anyway, knowing that her parents would defend her actions, but no matter how upset she was, she didn't want to ruin her sisters day and create a scene. She heard James call out again.

"Please, Lily." He called. "You can't hide forever. You'll have to talk to me either way."

Lily was sure that steam was rising from her body. She stomped around her room and found a shoe. She threw it at the door and shouted, "Shut up, you great prat!"

"Lily..." She heard him sigh. She walked over to the door and rammed her shoulder into it, her angry increasing.

"What are you still doing here? Why don't you go and shag your bimbo and I may as well just go snog Severus, shall I?" She yelled, her vision blurred by tears. She wiped her eyes on her sleeve and smiled bitterly to herself. That shut him up.

She went back to her bed and lied down, staring at the roof. She missed her mum, her dad, Louise, Morgan. In all the noise, her owl Effie had woken up and now sat in her cage, gazing unapprovingly at Lily. That reminded her; she promised her parents that she would write.  
Lily got up and retrieved some parchment, a quill and ink from her desk and sat back down again.

_Dear mum and dad,_

_I hope everything is going great with Petunia's wedding plans. I'm sorry I'm not coming, but I think it would be better that way. The Head Boy James and I organised a Halloween Ball which went well. Classes have been fine as usual, although the teachers have given us much more homework this year.  
There's not much to report besides the fact that I miss you all as always. See you all at Christmas for our holiday, I'm so excited!_

_Lots of love,  
Lily._

She folded it up and sealed it, handing it to Effie who looked relieved to escape this emotional Lily. Lily went back to her bed, her stomach grumbling. James was right; she would have to leave her room to go to dinner and by the noses her stomach was making, she shouldn't skip it. She wasn't a coward.

Taking a deep, shaky breath, Lily got up and opened the door. James jumped up straight away and rushed over to her. Lily glared at him, her stomach contracting, her toes curling. Even the sight of him made her sick.

"Lily, please let me explain." He said sadly. He looked exhausted. He searched her face and noticed her eyes were red; she had been crying. His stomach twisted with guilt. She remained silent so James continued.

"McGonagall asked me to tutor her, so Kate came over tonight and thing kind of got out of my control..." He finished quietly.

Lily threw her hands up and smacked a hand to her forehead. "Oh and that makes it completely okay!" She said sarcastically, pushing past James. He caught her wrist.

"Lily, you know I love you and you're the only one I ever want to be with." He said sincerely in a low voice, staring straight into her green eyes. For a second, Lily got lost in his caramel hazel eyes, but quickly snapped out of it, pulling her hand away.

"I've heard that before." She muttered as she left the Common room. James didn't follow her. He thought it was probably best to just let her go and he'd talk to her later. Every word he said was true. He had no interest in Kate and hadn't even noticed what was happening until Lily came. He was just going to help Kate as quickly as he could so he could apologise about the whole Snape-situation. He loved Lily and Lily only, no one else. It pained him to see her like this. He had to fix this and he had a plan.


	21. Chapter 21 - Prongs

**Chapter Twenty One **

Lily stormed into the Great Hall and immediately made eye contact with the Hufflepuff girl, Kate. Kate looked down guiltily and kept eating. Lily plopped down next to her friends and huffed.

"Lily, what's wrong? Your eyes are all red." Morgan asked, looking worried. Lily really wished she hadn't chosen the Great Hall to break down. She rested her head on Morgan's shoulder and sobbed relentlessly.

"Shh, you're okay." Morgan cooed, stroking Lily's hair. "Tell me what happened."

Lily looked up and wiped her eyes. All her friends; Louise, Morgan, Remus, Sirius and Peter were looking at her worriedly. Lily felt stupid for crying in front of them but she was so happy to see them. She figured she better tell them before James came down for dinner too.

"Well, I went back to the Heads common room to put my bag away and there's James getting up close and person with some ditsy Hufflepuff girl." Lily told them, struggling to keep her voice steady. She wiped away yet another tear and watched Sirius stand up, looking pretty enraged. He was staring at someone entering the Great Hall.

James was walking in, his hands in his pockets. He stopped when he saw Sirius leave his chair and storm over to him. He saw Lily try to stop him, but he ignored her.

"What are you playing at, Prongs?" Sirius snapped, making a few people look their way.

"It wasn't like that, Padfoot, I swear!" James said desperately. Why wouldn't anyone just believe him?

"Oh yeah, I'm sure it wasn't." Sirius said sarcastically. "There's a very upset Lily over there and I'm sure she's not crying for no reason." He said, pointing at Lily.

Lily wanted to sink into a hole and disappear. She couldn't hear what they were saying but the whole Great Hall was watching now and Lily saw Professor McGonagall striding over them. Lily wished she had waited until later or even tomorrow before telling Morgan and Louise. And she wished even more that Sirius hadn't gotten up and had just let Lily deal with it.

The two boys noticed McGonagall coming towards them and stopped talking. McGonagall said something to them angrily and Sirius returned to their table, a sad and ashamed James leaving the Great Hall.

"What happened?" Louise asked as soon as Sirius sat down.

"He reckons it didn't mean anything and nothing happened." Sirius scowled. "I could understand him sleeping around before but now he actually has something with Lily. It's just not on."

Lily smiled gratefully. "Thanks, Sirius."

"What if he's telling the truth, Padfoot? Prongsie wouldn't lie about this." Remus said hesitantly.

"Of course you'll take _his _side." Lily said, angry once again. "You think he just _accidently _let the Hufflepuff girl's hand creep up his thigh?" Lily stood up. She'd only had a few mouthfuls of food but she needed to leave.

"Lily, I'm not taking anyone's side!" Remus exclaimed. Lily ignored him and left the Great Hall. Again, she tried to hold back tears but her feelings and emotions were going haywire. She knew James would be in the Heads common room but she went there anyway, hoping to just push past him again.

She said the password and entered the portrait hole. She almost screamed, jumping back in fright. Waiting for her in the Common room was a large, brown stag. Something about it looked vaguely familiar but she couldn't pin-point it. She looked around and saw there was no James.  
She crossed to his open door and found the room empty. What was going on? The stag had turned to look at her again. Lily approached it cautiously, not sure if it would attack or something... But a part of her knew he was completely harmless.  
She ran hr hand over his soft, warm head and up his long antlers, back down and along his fury back. Lily knelt down in front of him and planted a kiss on his head.

"What are you doing in here? She whispered to the stag. She petted his head softly and behind his ears. He seemed to enjoy this as much as a dog or a cat would, pushing his head further into Lily's hand. She couldn't figure it out. How did he get in here? And when, why, who? All those questions ran through her head and she couldn't answer any of them. She walked over and sat on the couch. She patted her knee, like she was calling a dog.

"Come on, big guy, come here." She said softly. The stag sauntered over and lay his head on Lily's lap. She continued to stroke the stag's head and thought. Thought about Severus, about James, about Petunia's wedding. She sighed and wrapped her arms around the stag's neck and chest.

"I can't do it anymore. I can't do this." She said sadly, beginning to sob into the fur of this beautiful creature. She pulled back and looked into his eyes. That's what was familiar... The eyes. Lily didn't think about it much more as she buried her head in her hands, curled up on the couch.

It had felt insane talking to a stag but on the other hand, it felt food to let her feelings out, knowing that he couldn't talk back and would just listen.

"I-I just..." Lily began; almost laughing at how utterly strange it was to admit this to a stag. "I love him more than I've ever loved anyone. I don't know whether it's because I don't show him enough or give him enough or if it's because he gets more from other girls because they are willing to shag him, but I want it to be special, you know? Of course you don't, you're a bloody animal for Merlin's sake." She laughed to herself, knowing how ridiculous it all sounded.

Then something happened, something that pushed all other thoughts from her mind. The stag transformed into James. Of course, how could she have forgotten? How could she be so stupid? James was an Animagus. It was _his _eyes. She felt like an idiot for not realising it before. James stood before her, looking at her sadly.

"James?" She gasped.

James sunk to his knees in front of her. "Lily, I love you. I love you so much it hurts and I can't stand us fighting. Please listen to me." He begged.

"That was a mean joke – that was cruel. You're just – I can't –," she gave up trying to speak, climbing off the couch. James got up too. He had to stop her from locking herself in her room again.

He wrapped his around her before she could protest. Lily struggle to get free from his arms but he only held on tighter, burying his face in her hair.

"Get off me." She grunted, hitting his chest.

"Hit me as much as you want but I'm not letting go until you listen." He said stubbornly. Lily considered saying okay and getting out of his arms but if she was honest with herself, she felt good in his arms. Like she always had, she felt warm, safe and secure. She stopped struggling.

"You know I'm telling the truth, Lily. I would never hurt you or lie to you, I promise. I didn't even know what she was doing, okay? Please forgive me. I'm not interested in her, you know that. I can't live without you, Lily Evans, and even these past few hours have been hell." He said to her, leaning close to her. Lily looked up into his eyes saw he was telling the truth. She could tell. Could she forgive him? She would rather not be fighting, but... Oh what the hell.

"Okay." Lily breathed.

"You forgive me?" James asked hopefully. Lily nodded, looking down. He loosened his grip a bit but he kept their bodies touching. He removed one arm from around her and hooked his finger under her chin, lifting her face to look at him.

James captured her lips and backed them over to the couch. Lily straddled his waist, hands twisted in his hair, her lips moving against his. Lily felt alive pressed against him. She felt free of everything. She loved him and that's all she cared about right now.

Lily could feel the heat radiating off him, sending a jolt of electricity through her. She didn't mind kissing him all night but she was just a tad tired. She pulled back.

"I'm sorry I didn't listen to you." Lily said. As soon as she saw them together, all different scenes and conspiracies travelled through her head. Lily knew it was horrible that she hadn't trusted him; she should have known he wouldn't do that.

"I'm sorry, too." James said. Lily crawled off his lap and lay down, pulling him down with her. He rested his head on her chest under her chin and listened to her heartbeat.

"You're so beautiful when you're a stag. I knew I recognised something about you. It was your eyes." Lily told him. James nodded and looked up, kissing her tenderly on the lips. He scooted up further so that he was behind her, on his side, holding her close to his body.

"When can we have your special first time?" James teased.

"When did I say anything about it being by _first_ time?" She smirked. James stiffened and looked at her in alarm. Lily laughed and nudged him playfully. "I'm only joking!"

James laughed nervously and kissed her hair. "Better be," he grinned, tickling her sides. Lily squirmed and turned over to tickle him back. She ended it by kissing him passionately on the lips. That was good enough for him.


	22. Chapter 22 - Change of Plans

**Chapter Twenty Two**

Lily woke the next morning in her own bed, insisting to James that she needed sleep. She woke with a terrible taste in her mouth and a weird feeling in her stomach, and she couldn't figure out why. Lily got out of bed slowly, feeling a bit dizzy after stretching. She woke up with just enough time to get ready, rush to the Great Hall for breakfast, and then scoot off to class. Like yesterday, she changed into her uniform and pulled her hair back in a ponytail. James was already awake of course. Somehow, he could wake up insanely early on weekdays but sleep all day on weekends. Lily walked out of her room and joined him on the couch.

"Good morning." He said. Lily smiled and leaned down to kiss him. His lips were just the thing she needed to wake up.

"I feel like I'm forgetting something. Like there was something happening today." Lily said thoughtfully. Something was lingering in the back of her bind and she strained to remember.

Lily gasped, jumping off the couch and racing into her bedroom. As she checked her calendar, she remembered with a jolt that today was Petunia's wedding. She walked glumly back out to James and sunk into him.

"I remember." She stated.

"I noticed. What is it?" He asked curiously, slipping his arms around her.

"It's Petunia's wedding today." Lily told him.

"I don't understand why you don't just go. I mean, you have every right to." James pointed out.

"I know but I would rather not cause trouble, especially on her special day." Lily explained.

"I suppose." James said, kissing her forehead. A thought occurred to him. "Why the hell are they getting married on a Tuesday?"

"They're weird like that." Lily laughed. "She always wanted to get married in winter. I don't think I want to get married in such cold weather." She added thoughtfully.

"Well, when we get married, I promise we'll get married on a beach." James said happily.

Lily cocked an eyebrow. "We're getting married? I wasn't aware of that." She laughed.

"I bloody hope so." James grinned. Lily smiled to herself and checked her watch. They had about five minutes to spare before it would be too late for breakfast.

"Come on," Lily said, pulling James up. "I need to eat."

James agreed and followed Lily, his arm around her waist. He was so relieved they had gotten over what happened the day before. Turning into his Animagus form had been a last resort, he somehow knew it would work.  
Their friends were relieved too. Again, it was another long and boring day of classes. Lily's mind was going numb and she was sure he brain couldn't take much more, but somehow she managed to pull through until the end of the day. Thank Merlin she had most of her classes with James, who seemed to lighten up the mood, making her laugh.  
Sometimes she could sense him watching her take notes. Her stomach flipped and her heart fluttered every time she noticed. She tried to act normal but she could feel her cheeks reddening and couldn't stop herself from smiling.  
The day ended and Lily made her way back to the Heads room with James at her side. When she entered the Common room, she didn't notice her owl tapping at the window, but James did.

"Hey, isn't that Effie?" James asked, pointing at the owl outside.

"Yeah..." Lily said, crossing over to the window, remembering the letter she sent to her parents. She let Effie in and watched her swoop around the room before landing on the back of the couch. Lily untied the letter from Effie's leg and opened it.

_Our dearest Lily,_

_Petunia and Vernon have postponed the wedding to this coming Saturday. I have some good news, Petunia has agreed to let you come but she begs you not to bring that lovely Snape boy you used to play with. I really do hope you come, we have confirmed it all with Mr Dumbledore and if we just play it cool and low-key, and everything should be fine._

_All our love,  
Mum and Dad xo_

"_That lovely Snape boy_?" James mimicked in a poor attempt at Lily's mothers voice.

"Shut up." She said, hitting his arm.

"So, are we going?" Jams asked. Lily folded the letter away and looked at him doubtfully.

"_We_?" She repeated.

"I don't know about you, but I'm going." James grinned. Lily rolled her eyes and sat down. She would like to go and she knew James would behave himself, but she felt uneasy.

"I suppose we could go." Lily pondered quietly.

"You're lucky I can go. Because Ravenclaw beat Hufflepuff and now they play Slytherin, we get a week off." James told her. Lily nodded mutely and continued staring at her nails. James sighed and put a comforting arm around her shoulder, not knowing why she was so bothered about going to her sister's wedding. He was sure they would have a great time.  
For some strange reason, what Lily had said when he was a stag came back to him. All that stuff about not being good enough.

"Hey, Lily?" He started nervously.

"Yeah." She said, watching him struggling to get his words out.

"You know all that stuff you said when I was in my Animagus form?" He asked. She nodded and looked down, feeling embarrassed.

"I just want you know it's all bullshit. You don't need to worry about giving me anything. I know you love me, I see it every time you look at me and I hope you know that I'm crazy in love with you. I respect your decision about not wanting to rush in and that's completely fine with me." He assured her. To make sure she was listening, he cupped her face and made her look at him.

Lily could have cried. What did she do to deserve him? He was so loving and kind and gorgeous. She let out a long and relieved breath. She had been wondering last night if he had remembered everything she had said. She wrapped her arms around him and buried her head in this crook of his neck. James pulled her closer and held her tight, he never wanted to let go.

"Thank you," she whispered to him. "I love you."

"I love you more." He pulled back and captured her lips once more for a brief kiss before pulling back. "Let's not miss dinner." As they walked through the castle to the Great Hall, James remembered what night it was.

"Crap, it's that time of the month again." He whispered, hoping she would pick up his code.

"Excuse me?" Lily managed to ask through her fits of giggles.

"Oh shut up," James hissed. "I meant for Remus. You know, his fury little problem."

"Oh," Lily cottoned on. "Right, so you won't be back until tomorrow then?"

"Yeah. I'm really sorry, Lils." He said, noticing her dejected tone.

Lily shook her head and told herself to get over it. "It's alright, I understand." She told him, taking his hand. They entered the Great Hall and quickly spotted their friends, heading straight for them. Everyone was quiet once James and Lily sat down. No one really knew what to say, they all knew tonight was the night and the tension in the air was unbearable.

"So, you guys ready for tonight?" James asked Remus, Sirius and Peter quietly. He knew the girls were listening, but that didn't matter anymore. Remus nodded grimly and Louise took his head. The other two nodded as well, and then falling into silence, everyone ate their food. James glanced anxiously out the window and saw the darkness outside. He checked his watch, bouncing his knee, hoping Dumbledore would just dismiss them.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, their plates cleared and Dumbledore rose to let them good. He bid them goodnight and everyone stood up, pushing to get out of the Great Hall. James turned to Lily before he left and saw the worried look on her face.

"Don't worry, gorgeous." He said, wrapping her in his arms. "I'll be fine. We've done this a million times."

"I know," Lily replied simply, taking James' face in her hands and kiss him softly, not caring that they were standing in a crowd of students.

"Let's go." James murmured to the others and turned to leave; pulling his Cloak out of his pocket once they were away from everyone.

Lily invited the girls up to the Heads dorm for a chill-out session. For each of their girls, their nights consisted of homework and spending time with their boyfriends. Louise and Remus were a cute little couple, too afraid to do much more than kiss. Morgan and Sirius were a bit on and off but that's what they preferred. Morgan was used to getting any guy she wanted and Sirius was used to getting any girl he wanted. So at one point they would be snogging and the next they've broken up. Around ten o'clock, the girls gave up on their homework and put it away, then resorted to sitting in front of the fire and talking.

"Are you and James okay now?" Morgan asked.

Lily nodded. "Oh yeah, we're fine. I feel like a bit of an idiot being so dramatic about it though." Lily told them.

"Nah, if I were in your position, I would have done the same. Slap that boy silly." Morgan exclaimed. Lily looked at her funny before joining in on the laughter.

"How about you and Sirius?" Louise asked Morgan.

"Please, I am not even going there. First he's all like '_Oh Morgan, you're so beautiful._' And then he's all like '_I'm not getting what I need from you_.' Seriously, as if I'm going to shag _him_, who does he think he is?" Morgan said, waving her arms around as she spoke.

"Are you serious? He said that?" Lily asked. She thought that Sirius was actually interested in Morgan, not just wanting to shag. Morgan nodded and crossed her arms.

"Well – um – wow," Louise said awkwardly, looking at Lily and Morgan.

"I know right. And you know what? I've had enough; I refuse to be played by him. As soon as he gets back, I'm dumping his ass." She scowled.

"Are you sure, Morgs? I mean, I know you care about him –," Lily asked cautiously.

"I do not!" Morgan exclaimed, cutting Lily off. Lily shrugged and didn't say any more. Louise was too scared to say anything so she stayed quiet too.

At about eleven o'clock, the girls left, saying good night. Lily decided to camp on the couch so she knew when James was back. She was quite tired enough for sleep though, she decided not to. Luckily she had changed her time slot for the rounds; she didn't think she could concentrate tonight. She was still thinking about James, even though she knew he could take care of himself.  
She became restless, waiting late into the night. Close to one o'clock, Lily decided to write back to her parents.

_To mum and dad,_

_I'll come to Petunia's wedding, only to see you guys. And of course I'll keep it low-key. Tell Petunia not to worry, I'm not bringing Severus. I'm bringing James Potter, we have been together a couple of months and I'm sure you'll love him as much as I do.  
I'll talk to Dumbledore soon._

_Hugs and kisses,  
Lily._

Lily watched Effie fly away until she disappeared behind the clouds. Lily yawned, suddenly tired. She crawled onto the couch and pulled the covers up to her chin, staring into the fire. She drifted into a light sleep, not feeling quite as comfortable as usual knowing James wasn't there, but out in the dark with a werewolf.

It felt like five minutes later when she heard the portrait click open. Lily bolted up into sitting position and checked her watch. Just before six o'clock. James climbed inside, not looking as bad as last time. His eyebrow was split and bleeding, also a busted lip but that was all. He wasn't limping or holding his stomach which Lily took as a good sign.

She walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. She sighed into his chest. She could still smell a musky scent on him.

"Are you okay?" She asked, pulling back and studying his face. She ripped the bottom of her singlet off and bunched it up, dabbing gently at his cuts. Lily didn't care that her stomach was exposed; she quite liked the feeling of his strong warm hands on her bare hips.

"I'm fine, beautiful, don't worry about me." He said, pulling her close. He could feel her heart racing against his. Lily slipped her hands under his shirt, running them over his ribs and chest, searching for any injuries. James let a moan escape his lips at her touch. She gave him a look.

"Sorry," he laughed. "It feels good." Lily laughed too and stood on her toes, bring his lips to hers.

"What are you going to do about classes? Are you gonna skip or go to the Hospital Wing?" Lily asked.

"I'll go to the Hospital Wing; Madam Pomfrey will let me sleep." James told her.

"I'm coming with you." She answered straight away. She could be stubborn at times.

"No, you go to classes. I'll see you at dinner." James said. Lily grabbed his hand and led him to the couch, sinking into his arms.

"I can't make it through another boring day of classes without you." She whinged. James chuckled and twirled her hair around his fingers.

"You'll survive. We can spend time together now." He told her. Lily sighed and nodded, trying to get as close to him as she could. She kissed up his neck and arrived at his lips. She got excited as he sucked at her bottom lip, feeling his tongue brushing against hers. It was the strangest, yet best sensation in the world.

James' fingers traced Lily's bare skin under her ripped singlet. Lily suddenly became aware of her chest pushing against his, only a thin singlet and t-shirt between them. She curled his t-shirt in her fist and pulled him against her harder. He shifted his arms around her waist and lifted her onto his lip, still kissing her passionately. Lily felt tingle shooting through her legs as she ground into him. She got to work on his shirt, ripping the buttons open after getting impatient.

James smiled against her lips and helped her pull it off. Now James slipped his hands under her singlet, pulling it up over her head. They pulled apart for a second, breathing heavily. Lily was conscious of James' eyes searching her hungrily, his hand accidently brushing the bottom of her black bra. Lily quickly crossed her arms trying to cover herself and looked at James shyly.

"Don't." He said, running his hands through her hair. "You're perfect."

"I'm sorry. Why do I always choose the most inconvenient time?" Lily sighed angrily. James pulled her head down onto his shoulder and ran his fingers up and down her bare back, sending chills through her.

"There must be something wrong with me." Lily apologised again. She could hear James' heart beating and his chest rising, falling.

"Its fine, Lily, trust me." He said softly, his fingers bumping over her bra strap and circling her shoulder.

"But it's not fair for me to keep doing this to you. I don't know; I'm just scared." Lily shrugged.

"Well, what are you scared of?" James asked, like it was the easiest thing in the world to talk about. Almost everyone is a bit uneasy their first time, right? Lily thought. She was kinda freaked out about the whole thing, and apparently, it hurts.

"I don't know. Apparently it hurts." She said, feeling stupider and stupider by the minute.

"I understand, Lil. I'll look after you, okay? Whenever you want to, we will. I'll wait forever if I have to. I don't mind." He assured her.

"But you _do _mind." Lily insisted. "I know you want to but it's my fault we keep stopping."

"Of course I do," he chuckles. "Look at you. You're gorgeous and I love you. But as I said, I'll wait as long as I have to." James said once again. He really didn't mind. If Lily was hesitant, he would respect that.

"I love you so much." Lily sighed.

"Love you, too." He whispered. James looked down at his watch. "I should go to the Hospital Wing. You might want to put some clothes on. Or not, I wouldn't mind." He grinned. Lily groaned and rolled off James and onto the pillow next to her. James got up and stretched, bending low and giving Lily one last sweet kiss before leaving.

"I'll see you at dinner. Have a good day!" He winked and Lily glared back playfully. James left and everything was painfully silent and lonely. She got up and got dressed, wishing she could sleep longer. Lily left the portrait and walked down to the Great Hall. Here it goes.


	23. Chapter 23 - Not Again

**Chapter Twenty Three**

The day progressed slowly - too slowly for Lily's liking. James was in the hospital wing all day, which made her classes ever more unbearable. She sat in class pretending to listen and take notes as best she could. For the first time ever, Lily actually made one of her potions wrong. Professor Slughorn was a tad surprised that his best student was distracted.

The only enjoyable part of Lily's day was when she skipped lunch and visited James in the hospital wing. She walked in quietly, books clutched to her chest and made her way over to James' bed. He was sitting up against a pillow, legs crosses in front of him, reading the Daily Prophet.

He looked up and grinned when he noticed her enter. Lily smiled warmly and took the seat next to his bed.

"Why aren't you at lunch?" James asked even though he was pleased to see her.

"I wanted to check up on you. I don't think I can survive the rest of the day." Lily sighed. She picked up one of his hands and turned it over, his palm facing her. She traces her finger up the length of his hands and round the centre of his palm. Lily could feel his eyes on her. She smiled and closed bot of her hands around his.

She looked up straight into his eyes and let them stay there. James' hand left hers and ran itself through Lily's hair and then down the side of her face before dropping to her thigh. She smiled and spotted the same thick healing cream besides his bed that he used last time he was here.

She picked it up and unscrewed the lid. She dug out a scoop with her finger and spread it over his eyebrow and lip as gentle as she could. She sighed and put her head on the bed.

"What's wrong?" James asked.

"I'm such a lousy girlfriend." She mumbled. "You're so sweet and you always make me feel good about myself and I'm just..."

"What are you talking about? You're incredible, Lil." James said, lifting her head up to look at him. Lily scoffed. James laughed and tolled his eyes before kissing her.

"I better go," Lily said. "When will you be out?"

"I'll be out before you finish classes." James told her. So she left and made her way to Transfiguration grudgingly. It felt like the longest day of her life. It wasn't that she couldn't function without James; it was just that he made everything so much easier. His presence soothed her.

Lily packed up her books and made her way to the Heads Dorm. As James had promised, he was waiting there for her. Lily slumped into her room, dumped her bag and then sagged on the couch next to James.

"This trip abroad is starting to look better and better." Lily said, wondering how much longer she could put up with classes. She'd never hated class this much before.

"Don't worry; I'll make everything more interesting tomorrow." James grinned and Lily laughed.

"And I was thinking we should go and talk to Dumbledore about Saturday." James added.

Lily groaned. "Okay."

James stood up and took Lily's hand. She was still a bit uneasy about going to the wedding. She knew that Petunia wouldn't have agreed willingly. In fact, Lily had no idea how her parents had convinced her sister.  
James and Lily walked through Hogwarts to Dumbledore's office. James somehow knew the password again and Lily knocked on the door, waiting for the headmaster to respond before entering. Dumbledore was sitting at his desk as usual, waiting for them to be seated.

"Good evening, what can I do for you?" He asked, eyes twinkling.

"Mum said she talked to you about Petunia's wedding this Saturday...?" Lily started.

"Ah yes, I have organised a Portkey to take you to your house Friday after classes." The professor told them.

"Thank you, sir." Lily said. Dumbledore studied her before turning to James.

"I understand that you are attending as well, Mr Potter?" Dumbledore asked, somewhat amused.

"Yes, sir." James replied.

"Excellent! I will meet you here after class on Friday. Anything else?" Dumbledore asked. They shook their heads and he dismissed them.

Lily and James left Dumbledore's office and walked back to the Heads Dorm. Lily was quiet most of the way, dreading the thought of going to Petunia's wedding. James looked like he was about to say something a couple of times but stopped himself.

"I don't understand why you don't want to go. You were so upset when she didn't invite you; I thought you'd be happy." James said finally.

"I just know that Petunia doesn't want me there. She only agreed because mum and dad hassled her." Lily explained.

"I suppose." He said as the entered the Heads Dorm and sat down.

Lily had her homework sitting on the table and pulled it towards her. She got started on the Potion's essay, which was surprisingly easy. Many times James tried to get her to close her book and have a break but she didn't give in. Her pile of homework was growing taller and taller every day and now that her weekend was occupied, she didn't have much to complete it. So she figured she should do as much as she could now.

James gave up and got his books out too, following Lily's example. Then there was knock on the door, making Lily jump. The portrait of the old man informed them that a Hufflepuff named Kate was awaiting them. Lily looked at James and gave him a glare.

"I didn't know you were still tutoring her?" She hissed, snapping her book shut.

"I'm sorry! I completely forgot, honestly." James whispered back, making his way to the door. He opened it and let Kate in. Her face drained of colour when she saw Lily sitting there.

"Hi Lily, h-how are you?" The blonde asked uneasily.

"Fantastic." Lily said in a fake-cheerful voice. "I'm just off to drown myself in the toilet." Lily pushed past Kate and into her room, stopping at her door.

She turned back to the girl. "Just remember, I won last time." And with that she closed her door. She heard James call her name again. Lily knew there was nothing going on between them but that didn't mean she liked the girl. The least James' could've done was tell McGonagall he couldn't tutor her anymore. Or he could've just told Lily in the first place.

She decided to have and a shower and wash the stress down the drain. She hung her head back under the water and let it run through her hair. She had no idea what she was going to wear to Petunia's wedding. The only half-decent dress she owned was the one she wore to the Halloween Ball but that was hardly acceptable for a wedding.

Lily tried to waste time once she was out of the shower. She sent her parents another letter telling them she had talked to Dumbledore and was looking forward to seeing them. She sent it off with Effie and returned to her bed, opening her muggle reading book. It was romance book. She wished she could have an easy relationship like the woman in the book.

When she couldn't concentrate any longer, she chucked the book to the side and went back out to the common room. Kate was nowhere to be seen, which made Lily very happy.

"Lily, please don't be angry. I thought we were over this?" James said, standing up.

"I don't care about her, I trust you. I just thought you would've told me at least that I still had to see the bimbo." Lily scowled.

James chuckled. "Bimbo? Look, I'm sorry. I honestly forgot. I'll talk to McGonagall tomorrow." He added.

She sat in one of the armchairs. "I trust you, James."

"Thanks baby." James smiled, sitting in the chair opposite. They sat in silence. Lily had a massive headache so she tried rubbing her temples. Also her stomach started to cramp. Merlin, it seemed to be her time of the month. She closed her eyes and groaned, hanging her head over the back of the chair.

"You alright there?" James asked.

Lily shook her head. "Girl problems."

"Oh," James said plainly, and then he leapt up. "Wait here, don't go anywhere!"

"Trust me, I won't be." Lily said miserably, her head still hanging back. She didn't even bother to ask where he was going as he sped out of the portrait hole. Lily sat and waited, her hands clutching her stomach.

James returned quickly, carrying a few items in his arms. He set them down on the table in front of them: a mug of something warm and a block of Honey Jukes chocolate. Lily slowly pushed herself up and buried her face in his chest, hugging him gratefully. James hugged her back and kissed her hair.

Lily grabbed a mug, sat on the couch and blew at the brown liquid before taking a sip. Ah, hot chocolate – perfect. James joined her on the couch and popped a piece of chocolate into his mouth.

"I don't know what I'd do without you." Lily said, snuggling closer to him. He didn't say anything, just kissed her cheek and smiled smugly. Earlier this year, he had never imagined he'd be in this position. Falling in love with Lily and Lily loving him back was a dream come true. They finished the chocolate and got up, stretching.

"Are you sleeping with me tonight?" He asked her. Lily cocked an eyebrow, biting back a laugh. "Oh Merlin, I didn't mean it like that."

Lily grinned. "Alright. I'll be right back." She walked into her room and found her pyjamas on the floor. She was half undressed with only a bra and underpants when James decided to walk in.

"James!" She screamed, trying to cover herself. She could feel her cheeks reddening.

"Woah..." Was all he said, looking over her body. Lily uncovered herself boldly and put her hands on her hips, glaring at him. He stood there, her whole body showing. He stood there, still taking in the sight of her.

"Finished yet?" She asked sarcastically, crossing her arms over her chest. His eyes lingered at that spot for a second before making eye contact. He grinned.

"Have you been working out?" He asked. Lily rolled her eyes, grabbing her wand from her bed and slamming the door in his face with a flick of her wrist. She chucked on a singlet and shorts and walked into James' room.

"Don't be such a jerk." She said to him. He was already lying in bed, waiting for her. She crawled in with him, tangling her bare legs with his. He ran a toe up and down her leg, tickling her. She giggled and pushed it away. They there, inches apart, looking at each other. James pushed their hair from her face and ran a finger across her eyelids, down her nose and along her bottom lip.

"You are really gorgeous, you know." He said, sliding a hand down her back causing her to shudder.

"Thank you." She whispered, lost in his eyes although still acutely aware of the thin pieces of fabric between them. It thrilled Lily; the feeling of her chest against his and his breath on her face.

Lily ran her hand up his chest, up his neck and onto his cheek. She brought his lips to hers, tasting the familiar minty sensation. He kissed her back harder, their tongue dancing around. Lily hooked a leg around him and pulled him closer, kissing harder. His hand was on her lower back, and hers lost in his hair.  
James rolled her under him, so his body covered her petite frame. He kissed down her neck, along her collarbone and the swell of her breast. Then he made his way back up to her lips, sucking at her bottom lip and running his tongue along it. Lily pulled back, her breath ragged. James rolled off her and she buried herself in the crook of his neck.

"Never leave me." She whispered.

"Never. I love you." He said back, stroking her hair. She looked up at him.

"Why do you hate Severus?" She asked. She knew what Remus had told her but she wanted to hear it from James.

He cocked an eyebrow. "We were just snogging and Snape is on your mind?"

"Just answer me." She laughed. James gave her a look and thought about the best way to answer.

"Because he had you and I didn't," James began. "I've loved you ever since our third year. I couldn't stand watching him with you when I knew you deserved so much better. I could've given you everything and anything. Even friendship would have been enough for me. I just wanted to be with you."

"I'm sorry." Lily said quietly. "You deserve better than me. What do I give you? A good snog and that's pretty much it."

"No it's not, don't even say that. All I need is you and your love and I have that." He told her, kissing her forehead. "I'd do anything for you, Lily Evans. I would die for you."

A single tear trickled down Lily's face. Damn James Potter and his smooth words. Her heart was heavy with emotions. He whipped her tear away. "Don't cry, beautiful." He told her.

Of course, this made Lily cry harder. She was extra emotional today – she guessed it was the hormones.  
They stayed together until James fell asleep. Lily couldn't sleep that night, no matter how hard she tried. In the end, she slowly slipped out of bed and grabbed James' Invisibility Cloak. She left the Heads Dorm and navigated herself through the deadly silent school corridors. She ascended the stairs to the Astronomy tower and sat down, looking across the dark grounds of Hogwarts.

Both the stars and the moon shined brightly, lighting up her face. She stayed there for hours until she could see the sun rising above the horizon. She checked her watch – it was six thirty. She still had time until she had to get ready for classes.

Lily didn't know how she was going to function without any sleep. Mayne she could go to the hospital wing and pretend to be sick. Madam Pomfrey could give her a note, excusing her from classes and she could sleep all day. Yes, that's what she'd do.

Lily slowly made her way back to the Heads Dorm at around eight-thirty. When she entered, James' head snapped up.

"Where have you been? I looked everywhere. I was starting to worry." He said, taking her hands in his face and searching her eyes.

"I'm fine; I just couldn't sleep." Lily said miserably. "You go to class. I'm taking the day off." She rubbed her eyes and slumped into the couch, lying down and putting a cushion under her head. James walked over and replaced the cushion with his lap.

"What are you doing?" Lily asked, looking up at him.

"I'm staying here with you." James declared.

"But you already missed classes yesterday. You can't skip again." Lily insisted.

"Why do you want to get rid of me so much? I'm staying here and that's that." He said stubbornly.

Lily sighed in defeat. She closed her heavy eyelids and let herself fall asleep.

•

"I'm not hungry!" Lily found herself insisting for the third time.

"You haven't eating anything all day." James exclaimed, frustrated.

"Maybe that's because I'm not hungry." Lily snapped. James had been trying to get Lily to eat ever since she woke up four hours ago, a little after midday. It was true though – she just wasn't hungry.

"I don't know why you can't just –," James started.

"Just shut up, will you? You're doing my head in!" Lily bellowed, cutting him off.

"Well sorry for trying to help you." James scowled.

"Stop trying to help me then. It's making my head throb." Lily said, sitting down and holding hr head in her hands.

"Fine! I'll just leave then." James yelled, getting up from his desk at the back of the common room.

"Good. The door is over there." Lily shouted back.

So he left and Lily was alone. She laid back and stared at the roof, rubbing her head. Why were they always fighting over such little things? She wasn't hungry, what was wrong with that? There was always dinner...

She had nothing to do. Her head pounded even harder every time she opened a book or tried to do homework. All she could do was sit and think about things; about James, about Petunia's upcoming wedding, homework, wising her relationship was innocent and easy like Remus and Louise's. Remus didn't question everything Louise did. And Louise didn't overthink everything like Lily did. What was wrong with her? It wasn't fair to get so angry at him for no reason.

James didn't return until at least four in the afternoon. Lily had no idea where he had been for the whole time. When the portrait hole opened, Lily stood.

"James –," she began but stopped. In walked James, along with Bimbo Kate. Lily's face darkened.

"Oh... What's up, guys?" Lily asked quietly, slightly taken aback.

"Kate has come to hang out." James announced. Lily raised her eyebrows and tried as quickly as she could to think of something to say.

"Don't let me stop you. I was just leaving." Lily said, fake smiling again. She went to leave but Bimbo Kate spoke.

"Why don't you hang out with us?" She asked in her annoyingly high voice. Lily could see that James wasn't quite happy with that. She gave him a filthy look and turned back to the girl.

"I'd rather not watch you try and steal my boyfriend. Find someone else's scraps." Lily spat before walking out. She really shouldn't have walked out so quickly, her head was spinning and she felt light-headed. She went as quickly as she could without falling over to the Gryffindor common room. She said the password and found her friends straight away.

"Hey Lily." Louise said happily. "Where's James?"

"Woah! What's wrong?" Morgan asked when she saw Lily's face. She sat down with them at the table in the back corner.

"Lily, are you alright?" They asked again. Lily shook her head. Where did she begin?

"Well, to answer your question, James is with Bimbo Kate." Lily mumbled.

"Bimbo who?" Morgan asked, glad Lily couldn't see her trying to supress a giggle.

"The Hufflepuff girl he was flirting with last time." Lily told them.

"Did you guys fight again?" Louise asked quietly. She could see Sirius and Remus looking their way.

"We're always fighting," Lily scowled, "but yes, we did and over the stupidest thing. I don't know why he had to go and get that bimbo though."

"Probably to make you jealous." Morgan suggested. Lily shrugged and looked down. Morgan and Louise glanced at each other, wondering what else to say. The girls sat in silence.

Lily just wanted to shrivel up and die, to be completely honest. She had never felt so depressed before. It wasn't just James, it was every single other thing in her life weighing down on her.

"Let's go and check it out. We'll make Bimbo Kate wish she never came onto James." Morgan declared, standing up. Louise grinned and hooked her arm through Lily's, pulling her up too. Lily groaned and leaned against Louise for support.

"Forgot to mention my head feels like it's going to explode." Lily mumbled.

"Oh, sorry." Louise apologised.

Sure enough, when the three girls entered the Heads dorm, they saw what they all feared most. James and Kate were snogging on the couch. How could James be so angry about such a simple thing that he had to go and snog another girl to get back at Lily?

Anger boiled up inside her. She whipped out her wand and cast a shield charm between them, pushing them apart. Lily walked up to them and pointed her wand right at Bimbo Kate's face.

"Beat it, home wrecker." Lily snarled. Kate panicked before running out of the room. Louise and Morgan cracked up laughing.

"You!" She shouted, rounding on James. She brought her hand up and slapped his face. James clutched his face and looked back at Lily, her wand raised and pointing right between his eyes.

"Now run off after your girlfriend before I do worse than that." Lily growled. She was furious, livid. She knew she wasn't overreacting this time. She saw it with her own eyes, so did Morgan and Louise.

"You wouldn't dare. Besides, do you really think you could take me on?" James said cockily.

"I don't know, but can you take on the three smartest witches in Hogwarts?" Louise asked. Lily looked over and saw that the two girls were also pointing their wands at James.

"He doesn't have the balls." Morgan snarled and Lily grinned. James glared at her before storming out. Once he was gone, Lily turned to her friends.

"Thanks, guys." She said gratefully.

"That's what we're here for. Kicking butt since 1971." Morgan grinned.

"Are you alright, Lily?" Louise asked carefully.

"Yeah," Lily said quietly. "Looks like I'll be going to Petunia's wedding alone."

"What? She's letting you come?" Morgan asked. Lily nodded.

"That's good, isn't it?" Louise asked. Lily shrugged.

"Do you want us to stay here with you?" Morgan asked. Lily shrugged again.

"Come on, Lils, tell us what you're feeling." Louise insisted.

"I feel like my heart us officially broken, as dramatic as it sounds." Lily said weakly. The girls gave her a sad smile and sat down with her, putting their arm around her shoulder.

•

The girls stayed with her until it was time to go to dinner. Luckily, James hadn't come back. She was hesitant about going to the feast, knowing he was there. But she had to be strong. And besides, she was hungry.

Lily and her two friends entered the Great Hall, Lily's eyes immediately finding James. She smiled smugly to herself, happy to see her hand still imprinted on his face. She walked straight past him with her head held high. They sat right down the end of the Gryffindor table, closest to the teachers.

Lily ate silently, trying to stop herself from looking down the table at James. She laughed along with her friends, trying to seem unaffected by James betraying her. She wondered if he had told the other Marauders, and what they thought about what happened.

The feast finished and she told her friends she would see them tomorrow and thanked them for being there for her. When she entered the Heads common room, James was there in his Animagus form, waiting for her.

"Nice try, Potter. You better scram before I cut off your antlers and roast them on the fire for Effie." She said as rudely as she could. She stormed into her room before James could switch back to his human form.

"Come on, Lily. You have to talk to me. We have Petunia's wedding on Saturday." He yelled from outside the door.

"You should've thought about that before you completely ruined us." Lily shouted back.

"We're not completely ruined; just let me talk to you." James said.

"It's too late for that. I want nothing more to do with you. We're officially over, finished." She bellowed, fighting to keep the tears back.

"Lily, I know you are hurting as much as I am." He said quietly. Lily yanked the door open so fast that James took a step back.

"AND WHOSE FAULT IS THAT?" She roared at him, letting tears splash down her face. "You broke us up! You went behind my back to make me jealous! You did this. This is your fault. I trusted you and you broke it again. You have no idea how I'm feeling." She finished.

"Lily, please forgive me." His eyes stung and her words shattered him. It was his fault.

"Forgive you?" She asked, walking forward and pushing him. "Never in a million years, you complete arse, James Potter!" She poked him on the chest in-between every word. He didn't say anything so Lily pushed him again and locked herself in her room, sobbing into her pillow until it was damp and she fell asleep.


	24. Chapter 24 - The Evans' House

**Chapter Twenty Four**

Lily would have gladly packed up her stuff and moved back to the Gryffindor common room but she knew Dumbledore would never say yes without asking awkward questions.  
The rest of the week leading up to Friday went oddly fast. One moment she was just waking up and dreading having to see James. He tried several times to talk to her but eventually gave up after Lily continuously ignored him. And then the next moment it was Friday and she was packing to go to her parents' house. She panicked, rushing around the room trying to find stuff she needed to take. After chucking everything possible into her trunk, Lily hauled it into the Heads common room.

"Well, I'm going." She said stiffly to James, who was sitting on the couch. It was the first time in says she had said a single word to him. "Could you please organise the Prefect's while I'm away?"

"Lily –," he tried.

"I should be back by Monday but tell them that rounds resume as usual." Lily continued, ignoring him.

"Lily, are you sure you're going to be okay?" James said before she could say anything else.

"Yes, I'm sure I'll be quite fine." She replied, sending him a dirty look.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come?" James asked quietly.

Lily laughed bitterly. "No thank you. I think you've ruined enough." James hung his head. "Plus, I think I might talk to Dumbledore about moving back to the Gryffindor tower."

"But I-I'll hardly be able to see you!" James blurted out.

"That's the point." Lily said rudely. James sunk onto the couch ad held his head in his hands. Lily could've sworn she saw his shoulders shaking. He couldn't be crying? He caused this. So why did she feel so guilty? Well, he really was trying to fix things... But he created this mess in the first place. She sat down in the chair opposite him.

"What I don't understand," Lily said slowly and carefully, "is if you l-loved me, then why did you do that in the first place?"

"I don't know. I was an idiot. I was angry. I was an angry idiot. I knew you hated her and I just..." James said awkwardly.

"Thanks, that's very reassuring." Lily said sarcastically.

"I didn't mean it that way." James whispered, but he didn't elaborate any further. They sat their silently, looking anywhere but at each other.

She wasn't very close to forgiving him but at least they could talk civilly. If she had it her way, she would go back and prevent the fight or even just forgive him now. But how was she supposed to trust him? Lily couldn't even explain the feeling she got when she saw James with that girl. It was like torture. All she felt was betrayal and loss and anger and loneliness.

"I have to go," Lily said, getting up slowly, "I think it's best if you just stay here." She told him. He nodded, standing up too. As Lily walked to the portrait hole, James caught her wrist.

"Just promise me one thing." He said, standing inches away from her. Lily remained silent so James continued. "Write to me. At least one, Lily, please. I-I need you." He said in a low voice.

Lily stood there, looking up at him. She contemplated her answer. If she said no, that would show him just how upset she was and they wouldn't talk anymore. If she said yes, that would mean they were on talking terms. She didn't want to, but that look on his face...

"Fine." Lily sighed, looking down. James surprised her by bending down and kissing her cheek. She got the same tingly, electric feeling she always did whenever his lips touched her. She couldn't deny that.

They say listen to your heart. If Lily listened to her heart, that would put her in a difficult situation. If she listened to her head, she could leave without any fuss. Her heart was telling her to drop everything and kiss him, long and passionately like they used to. Her head told her to just leave. But the last time she listened to her head, she landed herself in this situation. She noticed these past few days just how much she relied on James' company and love. They had been some of the most unhappy and loneliest of her life. How long could she stay angry at him? Oh Merlin, she must be crazy...

"Go and pack something then." Lily sighed dejectedly. She looked down and rubbed her forehead.

"What?" James asked in surprise.

"Hurry, before I changed my mind." Lily warned.

Ten minutes later, Lily and James were walking to Dumbledore's office, awkwardly silent. James was trying not to grin and skip the rest of the way. Lily was trying not to think of what she'd gotten herself into and whether or not it would be a good idea to run up to the Astronomy tower and jump off it.

"Thank you, angel. I'll make it up to you." James said to Lily quietly.

"We'll talk tonight." Lily replied, trying to ignore her heart melting when he called her 'angel'.

Dumbledore was standing at his desk when they walked in, an old tea pot set in front of him. Lily had never told Dumbledore that James wasn't coming, so to him the plans had never changed. He looked up and greeted them.

"Is this the Portkey, sir?" James asked, looking at the old rusty tea pot in front of them.

"Indeed it is," Dumbledore told them, "it will take you straight to the Evans' house. Your parents are awaiting you." He said to Lily. Then the tea pot glowed and Lily and James quickly grabbed a hold of it and felt themselves being pulled in, away from Dumbledore's office and into Lily's living room.

Lily's dad got such a fright that his glasses fell off his nose and he spilt his coffee on his pants. Mr Evans cursed and ran into the kitchen. Lily's mother entered the living room.

"Lily flower!" She exclaimed and pulled her daughter into a hug. Lily squeezed her mum back, smelling the familiar scent of cookies on her.

Mr Evans returned and ruffled Lily's hair before turning to James. "So you're the James Potter I've heard all about!" He exclaimed.

"Yes, sir." James said politely.

"Pleasure to meet you." Mr Evans said, holding out his head. James clasped it firmly.

"Pleasure to meet you too, sir." James said, slightly nervous. Lily's parents had to like him, it was important. He had to make a good impression.

"Don't worry about calling me 'sir'. I'm a cool dad, aren't I, Flower?" Mr Evans asked Lily.

"Right." She muttered, still trying to flatten her hair.

"What do you two have planned for the day?" Mrs Evans asked happily, slipping her baking mittens off.

"Nothing really," Lily answered. "The only thing is, I don't have a dress for the wedding."

"Oh, I already bought you one, darling! Come on, James, let's see what you think." Mrs Evans took James and Lily by the hand and led them upstairs to Lily's room. James noticed her room looked identical to hers at Hogwarts. It was painted in warm colours, there was a double bed, chest of drawers, a wardrobe, a desk and a door in the left corner that James guessed led to a bathroom.

"The dress is in the bathroom, sweetie." Mrs Evans told her. Lily glanced at James then entered the bathroom.

James explored the pictures on her desk and bedside table as he waited for Lily. Her mum went into a long description of every photo, telling him exactly when and where.

Lily stepped out of the bathroom self-consciously, wearing an elegant, pale yellow tight dress that stopped just above her knee. James stood up and gawked at Lily. She looked amazing.

"It's brilliant, honey! What do you think, James?" Mrs Evans squealed.

"You look gorgeous, angel." James said. Lily blushed, embarrassed that James had called her that in front of her mum.

"Perfect. I'll let you get changed and you two can set up James' bed on the floor here." Mrs Evans instructed as she left the room. James grinned at Lily once her mum had left.

"You really do look incredible, Lil." James said, walking towards her. He picked up her hand and planted a small kiss on the back of it.

Lily's heart of waging an insane war inside of her. It felt so good to be touched by James again. But every time she looked at him, an image of Kate popped into her head and reminded her of why she was angry at him. Embarrassed, Lily yanked her hand away and escaped into the bathroom.

She stared at her reflection in the mirror, her hands on either side of the basin. She was so over all these emotions. She wish she couldn't feel. She knew she shouldn't have brought James. She should have left him there and moved on, maybe find another boyfriend. Too late now...

Lily chucked her muggle clothes on and left the bathroom. James was sitting on the end of her bed, his elbows propped up on his knees. She bustled around, unpacking her trunk, trying not to look at him. She bent down at the side of her bed and pulled out the sliding mattress that was attached to the bed. Lily straightened up and finally looked at James.

"What do you want to do?" She asked. Dumbledore had let them miss classes and leave school early, sit it was only midday and they had plenty of time to kill.

"C'mon, Lily, you're killing me. Can we please talk?" James pleaded. He was dying without Lily. He was longing to hold her again, kiss her, and have her body close to his. He regretted snogging Kate 100%. He didn't even know what made him do it. You know what they say; love makes you do crazy things... and not always good.

Lily stiffened. "Later."

"No," James said firmly, "now." How long was she going to avoid it? She can't just hide or run away from her fears and problems. She was going to have to talk about it one day.

"No, James, later." She said again. Lily left the room before he could say anything more. She went back downstairs, James following, and went to find her mum. As usual, she was in the kitchen making lunch and throwing a batch of Lily's favourite cookies into the oven.

"Hi, honey. Yes, I think the dress with be just fine." Mrs Evans said happily, chopping up some cucumber to throw into the salad bowl.

"Is there anything I can do, Mrs Evans?" James asked. Lily looked at him weirdly.

"Please call me Violet. And nothing, dears, just sit down and I'll serve up some lunch." Mrs Evans said, adding the last ingredient into the salad. James noticed that she was a rather bubbly person, like Lily used to be. Mrs Evans got the Shepherd's Pie out of the second tray in the oven and cut them a piece to go with the salad. Then she sat down with them and clasped her hands together.

"Tell me what's been happening! You hardly write to me anymore. So are you two a couple?" Mrs Evans asked excitedly.

"No."

"Yes."

Lily and James answered at the same time. Lily sent James a threatening glare.

"Ah, I see. Have you two had a falling out?" Mrs Evans asked, her face and tone serious.

"No mum, really, we are just friends, I guess." Lily said quickly.

Mrs Evans smiled and turned to James. "Don't mind Lily. Al though she won't admit it, her pride gets in the way sometimes –,"

"Mum!" Lily shouted, pushing her chair back and standing up. "You don't have the right to say anything! You don't know what happened. I'm sure you wouldn't be happy if you came home and found dad snogging another women! He cheated on me!" And with that, Lily stormed up the stairs before anyone could see her tears fall.

She slammed her door behind her and curled up on the bed. She lay on her side, sobbing into the pillow. Why did this ever have to happen? She knew James Potter was trouble.

She tried to breathe but the tears were coming too fast, dripping off the side of her nose and splashing onto the pillow. She finally calmed down and yawned. No one had come upstairs to see her yet so she closed her eyes and fell asleep instantly.

James stayed in the kitchen awkwardly. Mrs Evans stared at the door Lily had just left, wide-eyed. Then she turned to James and her gaze hardened. James couldn't blame her for being angry with him too.

"It was a mistake, Mrs Evans, honestly. I'm in love with your daughter and only her." James said quietly, staring at the table.

"Does she know that? Have you told her?" Mrs Evans asked.

"I bloody hope so. I tell her every day." He said sadly.

"Should I talk to her?" Mrs Evans asked. James didn't answer.

When Lily woke up it was dusk and there was only a tiny bit of grey light coming in from her windows. The covers were mysteriously drawn up over her and her shoes were on the ground next to her bed. Lily sat up and rubbed her eyes. She hadn't noticed the knocking sound that had woken her up. Someone wanted to come in.

"Lily flower, can I come in?" She heard her dad say from outside the door. He came in anyway without Lily's reply. He sat on the edge of her bed and looked at her sadly. Oh great, he found out what happened.

"Mum told me what happened." He started and Lily put her head on her knees. "He really didn't want to hurt you. I talked to him and I know he cares about you. He's a good lad, Lily; you should give him a chance."

Lily could feel her cheeks reddening and her heard beating through her ears. She kept her head down and mumbled. "What would you do if you caught mum with another man, dad?"

"I'd forgive her eventually because I love her. You told us yourself that you love him in that letter. Why don't you let him talk to you?" Her dad asked.

"I've given him so many chances." She whispered. After a while, she looked up bleary eyed and asked, "Where is he?"

"He's helping your mum cook dinner." He replied and Lily cocked an eyebrow. "I'm not saying you have to run back to him and jump into his arms, just let him explain himself." Mr Evans finished.

Lily nodded. "Thanks, dad." She jumped out of bed and gave him a hug. Lily walked back downstairs and into the kitchen. James was standing at the stove and cooking what smelt like spaghetti bolognaise.

He looked around when Lily entered and gave her a small smile, which she did not return. He could see her eyes were red and puffy again. The guilt and hate of himself was eating him alive. Every time he saw the pain in Lily's eyes he was reminded of what a tool he had been.

Lily broke the eye contact and sat next to her mum so she wouldn't have to sit next to James. He served them all dinner and took his seat next to her dad. Lily's parents and James chatted away like nothing was wrong. She kept her head down and swirled her dinner around. She still hadn't figured out how James knew how to use Muggle kitchen appliances.

Occasionally she would look up and notice James glance at her a couple of times. She wondered what her dad had talked to him about and how much James had told him.

Lily only had a few mouthfuls and only said something when she asked where Petunia was. Apparently she was out with her bridesmaid's and was staying at their house. That didn't particularly make Lily feel any better or worse. Everyone finished their dinner and James offered to do the washing up. Mrs Evans told him it was fine and to head upstairs. Lily led the way upstairs and sat on her bed.

"Are you okay? You've been a bit quiet." James said, sitting on his bed too.

"Oh, have I?" Lily asked sarcastically. James looked down. "Sorry, I've got a bit of a headache." She sighed, although that had nothing to do with it. He nodded.

"What's with you and cooking dinner? I didn't know you could use all the muggle stuff." Lily said, giving him a small smile. James grinned but didn't say anything. He had lost some of his confidence and didn't trust himself to say anything.

Lily sighed. "Well, I suppose we'll have to talk, c'mon then." She said, gesturing for James to join her. He jumped up onto the bed and sat opposite her.

"I'm sorry I've been so horrible. Well, more horrible than I usually I am." Lily apologised, looking down and feeling her heart bang against her chest.

"You don't have to be sorry." James replied. Silence followed and neither of them knew what to say next.

"Dad said the two of you talked." She prompted.

He nodded. "Yeah. I told him what happened. I told him how sorry I was and – and how much I regret it." Lily looked down and said nothing. What was she supposed to say? They sat in silence, one again, until James spoke.

"What did you guys talk about?" He asked. Lily tried to decide what to say. She could avoid it and say nothing but that would lead to more awkward silence. And if she told him the truth well, who knows...

"He told me to give you another chance because you're a good lad." She said eventually, looking down at her lap.

"So will you?" James asked quietly but hopefully.

"I don't know, James! Just put yourself in my spot for a second. How would you feel if I went and snogged... Severus?" She said angrily.

"Obviously I'd be upset but put yourself in my situation; hurting so much because you know it meant nothing but there's nothing you can do. I'm not letting you go, angel. I don't want any more fighting. I can't stand it. I need you." He told her. Lily tried to blink back the tears.

"You're right." She said quietly.

"What?" James asked, his face lighting up.

"I can't keep being angry at you. We'll see how things go." She said.

"I could actually dance right now." James grinned and Lily let out a small laugh despite herself.

"Please don't." She laughed. James got up anyway and started skipping around the room like a pony. Lily couldn't stop herself from laughing. James grinned at her walked over to her, holding out his hand. She took it and let him pull her up. She stood looking up at him, inches apart. Lily hoped he couldn't feel her heart pounding against his chest.

He held onto one of her hands and placed the other on the small of her back. He rocked them side to side, dancing slowly in a circle on the spot. They continued and Lily wasn't able to pull her eyes away from him.

"I've missed being this close to you. If only you knew what you did to me." He said huskily and Lily's heart flipped. She rested her head on his shoulder. James kissed her hair just like he always did and pulled back to look in her eyes.

"Can I kiss you?" He asked. Lily's eyes widened. What was she supposed to say to that? She wanted to so badly but she didn't want him to get the wrong idea. Oh what the hell was she talking about?

Lily beat him to it. She stood on her toes, wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her lips to his. He kissed back just as hard. James wrapped both arms around her waist and pulled her body closer. It felt just as amazing as it always did but even more desperate and hungry.

Lily couldn't get close enough to him. He backed them until her back hit the wall. James pressed himself against her and ran his hands up her sides, cupped her face and licked her bottom lip. Lily untangled her hands from his hair and slid them down his chest and under his t-shirt, feeling his smooth stomach and chest. She wished they were back at Hogwarts, alone. She needed him so bad, but she knew she couldn't with her parents around. Lil pulled back.

"Not here," she panted, "not now. My parents are in the next room."

James leaned his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. "Please." He whispered.

"We can't, I'm sorry. I know you've been patient with me but just wait until we're back at Hogwarts. I promise." She told him.

James let out a long breath and nodded. Lily gave him a quick kiss and went back to her bed. He sat on his bed, and then decided on Lily's bed. He hopped up next to her and lay down, pulling her down too. She wrapped an arm over his stomach and nestled her head on his shoulder. James stroked her arm. Just like old times.

"I'm guessing _you're _not a virgin?" Lily said.

James shook his head uncomfortably. "Regrettably – no."

Lily kissed his jaw. "Do I even want to know who it was with?" She asked bravely. "Actually, no, don't tell me. I don't want to know." James laughed. They lay together in silence, each to their own thoughts. Though both of them were relieved they were back to normal. Lily had forgotten how much of a good kisser he was.

"Lily, I'm so goddamn sorry. It didn't mean anything and if I could take it back, you know I would." He apologised again. Lily scooted up so they were face to face. She ran a finger down the side of his face, down his arm and grabbed his hand, bringing it up to her chest. James couldn't help but notice she had basically just places his hand on her breast. He tried not to look.

"It's okay. I forgive you. Mum was right; my pride got in the way. I couldn't admit that to myself. I missed you. I don't think I can live without you." She said quietly. James kissed her nose.

"I love you." He said nervously. James started silently praying that she would say it back.

"I love you, too." She said finally, grinning.

"Have you ever thought about what happens once we leave Hogwarts?" James asked.

"I thought we were joining the Order, weren't we?" Lily asked.

"Yes, I don't really want you to, but yes." James sighed.

Lily propped herself up on one elbow. "Excuse me? Why can't I join the Order?" She exclaimed.

"You can, it's just dangerous. If you got hurt, I don't know what I'd do." James said, looking at her. Lily smiled guiltily and lied back down.

"What I originally meant was, would you get your own place or you know, live with m-me?" He asked, stumbling on his words.

"Live with you?" Lily smiled.

"If you want to." James said quickly, looking down. He didn't expect her to say yes. He was sure she would have her whole life mapped out already.

"Of course I would." She said, squeezing his hand. James ginned and kissed her tenderly on the lips before leaning over to turn the lamp off. He quickly slipped his shirt off and brought the covers up.

"Oh, sleeping in here, are you?" Lily giggled.

"Of course I am, beautiful. It's too far away down there." He smiled. Lily laughed and snuggled closer, feeling the heat radiating off his bare chest. How did she get so lucky? She was never letting any of this bullshit happen again. She turned over and shuffled her back closer to him. He slipped an arm over her and kissed up and down her neck slowly, nibbing at her ear. Lily giggled and pushed him away.

"James? In the morning, when I'm awake and I can concentrate, can you remind me to tell you how much I love you and how I can't live without you? An every time I'm with you, my heart melts and my stomach flips. And when you kiss me, it feels like electricity is shooting through me. And how you're the best kisser in the world. And how good you taste. And how your body turns me on." She whispered.

"Sure. You know you're turning me on right now?" He added. Lily laughed and turned back to face him. She planted a small kiss on his lips.

"I love you, James Potter."

"I love you, too. Forever and ever, angel." James replied. 


	25. Chapter 25 - Petunia

**Chapter Twenty Five**

The next morning, James and Lily were woken up by someone knocking, wanting to come in. Lily didn't know what time it was but she sat up and brushed her hair from her face. James turned over and buried himself under the pillow. Lily told the knocker to enter as she rubbed her eyes. Her mum came in.

"Wow. I hope you guys kept I G-rated." She said, looking between the two of them. James bolted up when he heard it was. Lily realised what the scene must've looked like to her mum. It didn't help that James was shirtless.

"It's not what it looks like, Mrs Evans! I promise!" James blurted out quickly.

Mrs Evans chuckled. "If you say it isn't, then it isn't. Lily knows I trust her. But please, not in my house." She smiled at the two of them. "Breakfast is ready and Petunia is here." And she left.

Lily got up and dressed as quickly as she could, not caring that James was watching her. She wanted to get downstairs to see Petunia. She hoped her sister wouldn't be too angry, especially seeing as she'd brought James with her.

"Get up." Lily told James.

"Good morning to you, too." James yawned. He wrapped his arms around hr from behind and kissed her neck. Lily softened and melted into him, turning around and wrapping her arms around him too. They stood there and kissed for a minute or two before Lily made him get dressed.

They walked downstairs, hand in hand, and found Petunia talking with her mum at the kitchen table. Petunia looked up at them, her eyes narrowing on James.

"Hi, Tuney." Lily said quietly, smiling hopefully. James and Lily sat down at the table too, still holding hands.

"Hello. I didn't know you were bringing a guest." She said stiffly, looking intently at Lily and ignoring James completely. Lily glanced at James then back at Petunia nervously. She had hoped her mum would've mentioned James was coming; apparently not. All she wanted to do was avoid any confrontation on such an important day.

"This is James; we're – um – together." Lily said, trying to find the right words. Petunia looked at James coldly, making it obvious she didn't approve.

"Together?" Petunia repeated.

"Yeah, as in I love her and she loves me. That's what together usually means." James said. Who did this Petunia woman think she was? The way she was looking at Lily and questioning everything wasn't making James very happy.

Lily squeezed his hand under the table. Mrs Evans had decided to stay out of it, watching silently. Petunia sniffed disapprovingly and turned back to her mum.

"So, the actual ceremony will start at about two-thirty and the reception will be at five." Petunia said.

"That sounds excellent. Do you need any last minute help?" Mrs Evans asked.

"No, I should be fine. I just have to make some calls about the catering and Vernon's tuxedo. Then everything is ready." Petunia said happily. Lily rose from the table, pulling James up too, and walked over to the stove to grab some scrambled eggs. James wrapped an around Lily waist.

"How are you doing?" He whispered against her ear. Lily looked up at him and smiled sadly. She curled an arm around his neck and brought his lips to hers. She knew that Petunia and her mum were too busy talking to notice. She made the kiss quick and continued serving up their breakfast.

They returned to the table and sat next to each other. Petunia was still yapping on about her wedding plans and didn't even notice Lily trying not to laugh. James was walking his fingers up her thigh like a spider.

Lily's mum sent them a look that shut them up immediately. Lily and James ate their breakfast as quick as they could and excused themselves from the table.

"We're going out the back." Lily told them. She took James' hand and towed him outside to her favourite tree where she sat under, looking up at the blue sky and scattered clouds. She laid back, James joining. They kept their hands entwined.

"Remember last night, you told me to remind you –," James started.

"Yes, I remember." Lily cut him off. "Can't I just snog you to make up for it?" Lily giggled and James laughed too.

"That could work." He grinned, before grabbing her by the waist and rolling her on top of him. Lily laughed and leaned over him, her arms supporting her on either side of his head, her flaming red hair dangling in her face.

He tucked some behind her eat and twirled some in his fingers. Lily lowered herself over him and kissed him gently on both of his eyelids, then his nose, then finally landing on his lips. James lost his hands in her beautiful, silky hair and kissed her harder.

Their tongue tangled themselves like old friends. Lily breathed heaving through her nose, kissing him hungrily. She wished they could stay here forever, leave all the worries of Voldemort and school behind. None of that mattered when she was with James. He somehow made everything better. He was her drug.

She pulled back and grinned, resting her head on his chest, feeling his heart beat rapidly. She sighed and closed her eyes, hoping time would stand still. Who knew she would end up with James Potter, when only a year ago she was sitting here with Severus, talking about how much of a prat James was?

She felt guilty again for ever being horrible to James. She rolled off him and load on her stomach, studying his face as he looked up at the sky. James knew she was watching him and he loved it. He looked back down at her and grinned, running a finger across her lips.

"Were you and Snape ever – you know...?" James asked as though reading her mind.

"No." Lily sighed, looking away from him. She could feel her cheeks reddening. They hadn't ever kissed or anything but they had been close once. Lily had liked him a little bit, but she wasn't sure, and it was a long time ago.

"You say it like it's a bad thing." James said darkly.

"Well, no, it's not a bad thing but I remember wishing we did. It would have been nice if he was in Gryffindor and he and I were still friends." Lily explained. She let out a long breath and hung her head, letting her hair hide her face.

"So you would rather be with him than me if you two were still friends?" James snapped.

"I didn't mean it that way." Lily said indignantly, looking at him. "Of course I want to be with you."

"But how can you still want to be friends with him when he betrayed you and your trust by joining the Death Eaters?" James asked angrily.

"Because I know the real Severus. How do you know he's a Death Eater, anyway?" Lily questioned.

"I told you – I see things. He hangs out with Malfoy and his lot." James said.

"Yes, because they are in Slytherin and in the same year." She retorted.

"Doesn't that stand for something? Him being in Slytherin?" James insisted.

"Not all Slytherin's are bad, James." Lily said quietly, looking down again. She didn't want to fight anymore. She didn't even know why she was defending Severus.

James snorted. Lily rolled her eyes and lay back down again, looking up at the sky. James sat up and leaned against the tree behind him, bending his knees up. Lily sat up too and rested between James' legs, finding his hand and entwining their fingers.

"I don't want to fight." She whispered, kissing each of his knuckles. James combed his spare hand through her hair, untangling any knots. Lily tried to think of something for them to do. There really was nothing. She would love to take him out to a shopping centre or a cinema, but it would be too risky, which made her wonder...

"I wonder if the Order has put any protective enchantments on mum and dad's house."

"They have. Dumbledore did." James answered automatically, and then figured it probably wasn't a good idea.

"How do you know?" Lily asked, twisting around to look at him.

James hesitated. "My – ah – dad keeps me informed sometimes." He said quickly. It was partly true. Mainly Dumbledore kept him informed. James would make regular visits to Dumbledore's office to hear more news, that how he always knew the password.

Last summer, James had done a few minor missions for the Order, so Dumbledore felt it was right to keep him up to date, but no one was to know. Lily raised her eyebrows, making it apparent that she didn't believe him, but she didn't press him any further.

Lily and James stayed outside for a little while longer until Lily's mum called them in, telling them I was time to get ready for the wedding. James wished he had his broom with him because just as Petunia had hoped, it was a beautiful day.

Mrs Evans told them to hurry upstairs and get ready as quick as possible, apologising that there was no time for lunch. Lily let out a long breath and turned to James once they were in her room.

"Ok, I'll get changed in the bathroom and you stay here. Knock when you're done." She told him and rushed into the bathroom, closing the door. Ah crap, she had the wrong bra. She couldn't possible wear this one. There was no way she was going to ask James to get it for her. She creaked the door open and stuck her wand out.

James froze, half naked in only boxer shorts, when he saw Lily's wand poke out. What the hell was she doing? He heard Lily mutter something just as one of her drawers open and out flew a nude-coloured bra. James tried to keep his laughter in but failed miserably.

"What the hell are you doing, Lil?" He called.

"I had the wrong one." She yelled through the door. James grinned and continued getting dressed, chuckling to himself.

Lily was so embarrassed. She had hope he wouldn't notice a bra floating through the air. But after all, he _was _James Potter. She slipped on the dress and zipped up the heels just as she heard James knock.

"I'm ready. Can I come in? I need the mirror." He said through the door. Lily rolled her eyes and unlocked the door. She went back to the mirror above the sink and pulled out her make up bag. James stood next to her and flicked his want, pointing it at his hair. It flopped and landed awkwardly, looking messier than it had before.

Lily stopped applying her mascara and grinned, shuffling through her drawers. "Ever heard of hairspray?" She smirked, holding up a silver can. James shook his head. Lily uncapped the lid and began to work. By the time she was finished, after using half the can, James' hair was normal-looking at the back and pushed to the side at the front, making him look devilishly handsome. James gaped at his hair. Lily dusted her hands off and admired her work.

"I've got to get me some of that." James grinned. Lily laughed and went back to her mascara, then added a bit of eyeliner along with it. With her heels on, her legs looked a metre long and she was almost the same height as James. Still just a little shorter.

James looked her up and down. "Sexy." He winked before taking her arm and leading her downstairs. Mr and Mrs Evans insisted upon taking a photo of them. Then they helped load some things into the car before James held the door open for Lily.

"Ready?"


	26. Chapter 26 - Never Leave Me

**Chapter Twenty Six**

The long car ride to the church had Lily in a state of nervousness. She didn't even know why she was so anxious. It was Petunia who should be nervous, but Lily just had an uneasy, strange feeling in her stomach. She was just waiting for something to go wrong.

James was feeling the same, but not quite for the same reasons; Lily was worried about the wedding and making Petunia upset. James was worried about the smell under his nose – the smell of danger.

They pulled up outside the church and piled out of the car. Lily could see many people from her childhood walking in with their families. She also spotted a couple of friends and family members she hadn't seen since before Hogwarts times.

James linked his hand with Lily's, his eyes darting around suspiciously. He was on the lookout for anything odd or anyone out of place, but so far, nothing. Lily could see how jumpy he was but she wasn't sure why. She squeezed his hand reassuringly and walking into the church alongside her parents.

It was an old-fashioned church with high ceilings and ancient, beautiful stained-glass windows. Lily wasn't a bridesmaid so she sat in the front row with her mum and James.

More and more peopled filled in and soon all the rows were full. They didn't have to wait long until Vernon and his friends arrived, waddling up to the front. They were all as large or as troll-looking as Vernon, looking like cheeseburgers dressed in black suits.

As soon as the priest stepped onto his podium, music started playing and the doors opened. In walked Petunia, escorted by Mr Evans who was beaming at the crowd proudly. Petunia's dress was plain white and strapless, with a long train and veil. She had insisted that her mother's wedding dress was too old and ugly, so she bought herself a new one.

Petunia glided up to Vernon and kissed her dad on the cheek. As soon as Petunia and Vernon held hands, awaiting the priest's speech, Lily's mother burst into tears next to them, clinging to her husband's arm.

Lily imagined herself and James up there. She smiled to herself.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the love of Petunia Evans and Vernon Dursley," the priest began. He went on to say more but James tuned out.

He looked down at Lily's hand, entwined with his. He could definitely imagine himself up there marrying Lily. He felt a chill that ran through his while body, making the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. He felt as though he was being watched. His heart pounded.

James looked over his shoulder slowly and his eyes immediately looked onto a man with a rough, unshaven face and a scar that ran across his eye. The man was looking straight at him.

James pretended not to take notice and looked back around. He squeezed Lily's hand and bent down to her ear. "Don't look but there's someone watching us. This needs to end quickly." He whispered.

She looked up at him, her eyes wide and scared. "There's nothing we can do. Petunia wouldn't listen to me anyway. She would hate me if I ruined this." Lily whispered back hurriedly.

"She won't hate you once we save her and her guests." James said back.

Lily bit her lip. "Let's just see what he does first." She said shortly. She turned back to the priest, who was now instructing Petunia and Vernon to exchange their vows.

Vernon started first, mumbling nonsense to Petunia. She seemed to think it was sweet because she had tears streaming down her face. Then it was her turn.

Lily bounced her knee impatiently. James was right; this had to end quickly. She hated being this vulnerable. But she couldn't. The wedding continued and the man did nothing but sit there and watch them. Petunia and Vernon had their rings on and were about to kiss. Everyone stood up and clapped. Petunia waved, blowing her parents a kiss and then followed Vernon out to their car. The crowd followed, waving goodbye.

Lily and James moved amongst the crowd anxiously, looking out for the mystery man. Lily's hands were shaking.

Once Petunia and Vernon drove away in their black company car bearing the words, "Just married", the gusts started to leave.

Lily searched and searched but the man had disappeared like smoke, nowhere to be seen. James clung to Lily's hand, making sure she was right next to him as they walked back to the car with Mr and Mrs Evans. Lily's mother was still dabbing at her moist eyes.

"I think he's gone." James told Lily quietly, but he still didn't let his guard down.

"What was he doing here? Who was he? How did he know we were here?" She babbled.

"I don't know, Lil. But it's okay; he's gone." James reassured her, draping an arm over her shoulder.

Lily sat in the car on the ride home, shuffled up next to James in the back seat. If the guy was after them, how did he know they would be there? Only Dumbledore, the rest of Marauders and Lily's friends knew anything about the wedding. They definitely weren't in touch with Death Eaters. And they couldn't have been followed, seeing as the travelled by Portkey to her parents' house.

Once they arrived home, James and Lily excused themselves immediately. Lily's mum called after them, reminding them they didn't have much time before they had to leave again to go to the reception. Lily walked upstairs with James behind her. She locked the door.

"What do we do? He kind of just disappeared without a trace." Lily wondered.

"Probably disapparated. I'm just glad he didn't cause any trouble." James sighed, pulling out the chair at Lily's desk and sitting down. Lily sat on the side of her bed facing him.

"What if he comes back and tries to hurt my family?" Lily asked quietly. Sure, they could take him on but the man was a fully-grown, trained wizard but the looks of it. And what if he brought back up? What if he was prepared to kill them? Lily didn't know if she could use an Unforgiveable Curse on anyone. And what if he came back when they weren't around? Did he know where they live?

"I won't let him touch you or anyone." James said boldly. Lily smiled at him.

"Should we tell Dumbledore? Better to be safe than sorry." Lily suggested, playing with the hem of her dress.

"We'll wait and see. If he's there at the reception, we can send one of those Patronus messaged to Dumbledore and he can apparate straight to us." James told her. He also had another way of communicating inside Hogwarts – the two-way mirror he and Sirius use to talk to each other. He would simply speak into the mirror and Sirius would appear if he had the mirror on him, which they usually did. It was one of James' most prized possessions.

Lily stood up and sat on James' lap. He rested his hands on her bare thighs, tracing circles with his index fingers.

"It'll be okay, Lily. I promise you that no one will hurt you or your family while I'm around." He told her quietly, kissing her cheek.

Lily's heart melted and she rested her had back on his shoulder, looking up at him. James gave her an upside-down kiss and ran his finger up the length of her thigh, up her stomach, then through the middle of her chest which made her shiver. How did he manage to turn her on with a single touch?

She let a moan escape her lips and giggle. James grinned.

"How long is it until we're back at Hogwarts? I'm going insane with longing to undress you." James said huskily. Most girls' legs would have turned into jelly and they would've undressed themselves for him on the spot. But Lily just burst out laughing.

James cheek reddened.

"Come on, I've gotta change into my other dress." She told him, standing up. He tried to reach for her slim waist again but she slapped his hands away, grinning. "You'll have to do better than that."

James then leapt up and chased her. She ran as quick as she could to her bathroom where she could lock the door, but James snagged an arm around her and pulled her back. She pushed him roughly and tried to duck under his arm but he caught her again. She was laughing so hard that her stomach hurt and she fell limp in James' arms.

He pushed her up against the wall and held her arms above her head. She panted, trying to get her breath back as James pushed his body against hers. This didn't help at all. She saw James' eyes flicker down to her chest. She blushed and looked up at him through her eyelashes, embarrassed.

"Gotcha." He whispered against her ear, his breath tickling her neck. He ran a train of kissed up her neck and then to her lips, kissing her softly. He let her arms down and Lily cupped his face, momentarily breaking off the kiss long enough to say, "Never leave me."

"Never," he whispered back, "not until the day I die." James switched their positions so he was against the wall. He slid down until he sat on the floor, Lily following suit, straddling his hips. Her chest was still rising and falling, her cheeks flustered. James leant in to kiss her again but Lily placed her hands on his chest gently, stopping him.

"I would love to but we really have to get ready." She told him. They both got up slowly, grinning. Lily walked into the bathroom with her other dress, smiling over her shoulder at him.

The second dress was midnight blue, slightly more flowing which reached just below her knee. It was low cut, designed to hand low over her shoulders. Lily let her hair flow freely for the occasion and reapplied her make up.

James was lucky – he didn't have to change. And Lily had used so much spray in his hair that it was still in place.

He wolf-whistled when Lily immerged from the bathroom. She blushed and twirled in a circle for him.

"You have to stop looking so damn perfect," James told her, "Otherwise all the other man will sweep you away from me."

Lil grinned and walked over to him, wrapping her arms around his neck. "I only have eyes for you." She planted a kiss on his nose. Lily picked up her wand and stuck it in the only place she could – the middle of her chest, between her breasts.

James cocked an eyebrow. "Let me know if you ever need help extracting it." He winked. Lily rolled her eyes and tugged on his arm, pulling him downstairs.

"Let's go kick some creepy guy butt."


	27. Chapter 27 - Man Down

**Chapter Twenty Seven**

Lily, James and the Evans' pulled up outside the community hall where Petunia and Vernon's wedding reception was being held. James and Lily scooted out of the car and glanced around nervously. There was no sign of the mysterious man from earlier. Lily slipped her hand into James' and followed her parents to the entrance.

Everyone was milling around, the girls dressed up in beautiful dresses and the men looking slick in tuxedos. The hall was magnificently decorated in all white, kind of like a winter wonderland. Round tables were set up all over the hall, creating a little dance floor in the middle.

Lily and James searched for their table. Lily was happy that she was at least seated at Petunia's table. That was better than nothing. She hadn't had a chance to talk to her at all since their tense moment in the kitchen. She couldn't even talk to her at the wedding.

Lily sat down with James and her parents, looking around at all the little kids running around on the dance floor and all the groups of people socialising. Lily recognised moat of them as Petunia's friends or old friends of Lily's she used to know from around the neighbourhood. She really wanted to go and talk to them. When Lily tuned back to James, he was glancing around anxiously. Lily stood up and grabbed his hand.

"Come on," she said, "I want you to meet some of my old friends." She led James over to a group of girls she recognised. There were four of them; Sally, Mia, Rachel and Yvonne.

"Hi guys," Lily smiled, walking up to them. "Long time no see."

The girls look around in surprise. Sally with her long blonde hair, ice blue eyes and luscious eyelashes; Mia with her bouncy charcoal curls and full pink lips; Rachel with her vibrant gold hair, a mix between blonde and brown, her brown eyes watched them curiously; and finally Yvonne with her chocolate brown hair, beautifully toned skin and sea green eyes.

"Lily," Sally squealed happily, "it's been so long!" She kissed Lily's cheek. Yvonne still seemed to be the leader and spokesperson of the group, just as she was when they were young, Lily noticed. The other girls smiled at her with perfectly white teeth.

"This is James. James, these are my old friends Sally, Mia, Rachel and Yvonne." Lily introduced.

"Nice to meet you," James said politely, bowing to them. The girls giggled and blushed.

"You've got a cute one here, honey." Sally winked.

"Wherever did you find him?" Mia chimed.

Lily smiled a fake-smile back. "Yellow Pages." She told them. The girls lapsed into laughter. Lily always knew they were a bit ditsy but she didn't remember them because this shallow. Status and an attractive boyfriend was everything to them and Lily couldn't really care less about those things anymore.

"It's been nice talking to you," Lily said, "but we must excuse ourselves – more people to talk to." Lily winked as if it was an inside joke. The girls laughed and bade them farewell. As Lily and James walked away, Lily scrunched up her hands.

"Merlin, they get on my nerves." She said through clenched teeth.

"Then why did you want to talk to them?" James laughed.

"I don't know, I didn't think they were that bad!" They walked through the crowd, occasionally getting a hello or friendly wave from someone she knew.

"I'm sure you enjoyed our talk with them," Lily mumbled, back on the subject of the girls. "You could hardly keep your eyes off Sally's chest."

James threw his hands up. "Het, that is not true!"

"Oh, please." Lily said, speeding up a bit, pushing through the people back to their seat. "You were practically drooling."

"Okay, now that's a load of cow dung." James said, rolling his eyes. It wasn't his fault! The girl's – um – 'chest area' was almost spilling out of her dress. Who would want to wear a dress that revealing?

"She'd love to get her claws into you." Lily smirked. She plonked into her sear and took a long gulp of iced water, slumping back in her chair.

"Lily, please, that's very un-ladylike." Mrs Evans hissed at her. Lily sat up reluctantly and crossed her legs.

She looked around and saw Petunia weaving from group to group, greeting them. Lily thought her sister looked stunning tonight in her peach coloured dress and pearl jewellery.

Vernon and his friends were over at the food table, a drink in one hand and chocolate éclair in the other. How could Petunia marry him? He was about as sharp as Peter, and that was saying something. She laughed out loud and James gave her a strange look. Then his eyes went back to scanning the room for their unwanted guest. James hadn't seen him yet but his sixth-sense was going off, the sixth-sense that could detect dark magic.

The hustle and bustle of the crowd died down and everyone took their seats. Mr Evans, as most people knew, was a rather bubbly and out-going person even without the drinks. He stood up abruptly and called out over the crowd.

"Speeches! I shall start." He declared, turning to his daughter sitting next to him.

"My darling Tuney..." He began.

"Dad!" Petunia protested but Mr Evans continued.

"I cannot believe that my eldest daughter has just got married. I just want to let you know that I am incredibly proud of you. You are strong, intelligent and capable women. I'm just glad that poor old me made it to your wedding. And Vernon, old chap, welcome to the family!" Mr Evans raised his glass to them and everyone followed suit.

Next, Lily's mother stood up.

"Ah, well, your father pretty much summed it up but I, too, am proud of who you have become. I wish you a long and happy relationship f-full of l-love." Mrs Evans finished, choking up at the end. She sat back down as her husband put her arm around her.

Now it was Lily's turn. She stood up nervously. She could feel her hands shaking. She looked around. There were at least sixty eyes on her - probably more.

"F-First I will say congratulations. I always knew you would grow up to be this lovely, accomplished person," she said, looking at her sister. "I love as much as any sister can. I know we haven't really got along recently but I will always be your sister, I will always love you, and I will always be there for you." Lily finished, giving Petunia a small smile. Lily sat down shakily and felt James squeeze her hand encouragingly, telling her she'd done a good job.

Petunia's best friend stood up next. Lily didn't exactly hear what she said. Just stuff about what an amazing friend and person Petunia was.

James was still searching the crowd. It was like he could smell the guy. Now that everyone was seated, it should've been easier to spot him, but there was still no sign of him.

James couldn't decide if this was a good or bad thing? He was either not here at all, or he was doing an incredible job of keeping out of sight.

He snapped out of his trance when the music started and the new wife and husband shared their first dance. After the first song was finished, Mr Evans cut in to dance with his daughter. Vernon went off to dance with Lily's mother, who didn't seem too thrilled. Soon, the dance floor filled with couples.

James stood up. "May I have this dance?" He grinned, holding his hand out for Lily.

"It would be my pleasure." She replied, taking his hand. She stood and let him escort her to the dance floor. She looked up at him and stepped closer as he placed a warm hand on the small of her back. She laced a hand with his and put her other hand on his broad shoulder.

Lily loved the feeling of being this close to him, gazing into his eyes as she rocked from side to side. It was quite cheesy but she wouldn't have it any other way. Lily smiled and rested her head on his chest.

To her left she saw her mother and father dancing. Lily hoped that someday she would have a marriage like theirs; a long, happy and living one. Maybe with James.

Lily felt his body stiffen. She looked up inquiringly.

"He's here. I can see him." James said quickly. Lily cast a casual glance around the room. Sure enough, there he was. He was standing at the book of the room, standing as stiff as a cactus, watching people dance. Lily looked back to James.

"What do we do?"

"Keep an eye on him, but be discreet."

So Lily and James continued, occasionally moving around so James could get a better look at the intruder. Lily couldn't figure out who he was. Somehow, she could tell he wasn't a muggle – she just knew; there was a vibe coming from him, screaming danger. What did he want if he was just going to stand there and watch them eerily? Didn't Petunia notice that there was an unwanted guest at her party? No one even seemed to notice him.

Just as Lily took a turn of looking over his way, he locked eyes with her and sent a nasty grin her way. His teeth were yellow and chipped. They made Lily want to run home and rinse her mouth out.

Before she had time to react, a group of black hooded figures burst through the hall's doors. Lily and James broke apart, whipping their wands out. Where they after _them _or the muggles? Lily counted at least ten of them – _at least._ She didn't know exactly how two students were going to take on ten fully-trained Death Eaters.

People around them were screaming and running for the back exit. Girls were tripping over their heels and dresses. Men were elbowing each other out of the way. Lily locked eyes with James. She knew what they would have to do.

As quick as she could, she waved her wand and sent the quickest message possible to Dumbledore. She watched her Patronus gallop out the window. Lily hoped it would be enough information for Dumbledore. She saw her mum and dad standing at the back exit, hesitating about leaving her there. She glanced at James. He'd be okay for a few seconds... She ran over to her parents.

"Go! James and I will handle this. Dumbledore is on the way. Tell Petunia I'm sorry." Lily said as calmly as she could, ushering her parents out the door. Her mum pulled her into a bone-crushing hug.

"Will you be okay?" Mrs Evans asked.

"Yes, now go! James and I can handle this." Lily told them. Yes, they were good students; passed all their tests, could perform all the spells and charms and hexes, but were they really powerful enough to take on these Death Eaters? Could they hold out until Dumbledore got here?

Lily ran back to James who had uplifted a table, giving the, a few seconds cover until the cloaked men would blow it up.

"Did you send the message?" James asked, ducking as a curse flew over his head.

Lily nodded. "Do we have a plan?" Just as she asked, James popped his head over the table and sent a stunning spell towards one of the men. Lily didn't know if it hit or not.

"Blast the shit out of them." James said, answering her question. Lily didn't have a better plan so she shrugged and made a quick dash to another table. She did a sort of awkward commando roll and hid behind it, hoping to draw some of the fire away from James so he could get a shot in. She saw one man go down as James sent spell after spell.

"Impedimenta!" Lily shouted at a man running towards her. The spell did its job. He stumbled back and fell off his feet. Lily seized her chance and stunned him. She was not prepared to kill.

She ducked back down as a jet of green light came towards her – the Killing Curse. Were they really trying to kill them? Lily counted eight more Death Eaters left. _Come on, Dumbledore..._

"Pertrificus Totalus!" Lily aimed at another Death Eater but he jumped out of the way. Luckily, it hit the man behind him instead.

The men were getting angry now. One vaporised Lily's table as another sent a Killing Curse her way. It was a close call but Lily managed to dive out of the way just in time.

"Lily? Are you hurt?" James called over to her. He sent a curse at the git who was stupid enough to try and kill his girl.

"I'm fine!" Lily shouted back, deflecting another spell. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw James' table explode. "Stupefy! Stupefy!" Lily shouted over and over again, hoping to provide some cover for James while he moved over to her. They moved back and upturned another table. There were still six men and only two of them. Not to mention the fact that the Death Eaters were slowly but gradually pushing Lily and James back towards the back wall of the hall. They were running out of time.

Lily looked over at James. He seemed to be okay except for the cut on his forehead. "Oh Merlin, are you okay?" Lily asked, inspecting his face.

He swatted her hand away. "I'm fine. You?"

"Fine." Lily replied. They sent more spells over the table but it was useless. The Death Eaters just reflected them ad kept moving forwards.

Just as their table was blown to the side, the door burst open. Dumbledore. And it looked like he had brought a few guests along too. The Order went to work. There were at least five of them – it was enough to take on these Death Eaters. They had surrounded them.

The Death Eaters switched their focus to Dumbledore and the other men and women that accompanied him. Lily jumped up to help but immediately regretted it – one of the Death Eaters turned back around and flew at her like a jet of smoke. Time slowed down. Everything turned to slow motion and Lily froze.

She could see purple light jetting towards her and she had no idea what sort of curse it was. She couldn't hear anything, she couldn't see anything. She braced herself for the worst. She heard someone call her name.

Suddenly, someone covered her body, someone tall, and someone strong. The person tightened their arms around her, protecting her. She felt the body jerk and the person's arms loosened from around her.

She snapped back to reality. She heard loud bangs and shouts once again. Lily was also aware of a weight pulling her down. She looked down and saw James slumping against her. Her mind registered what she was seeing. No!

She screamed and melted to the ground under the weight. Her heart pounded in her ears. He wasn't moving. She cradled James in her arms and turned him over with great effort. His face was white; his body limp in her arms.

"No!" She cried out hoarsely, the word ripping from her throat. His eyes were closed and his skin cold, he couldn't be – He was just unconscious, Lily assured herself. Dumbledore would revive him and he'd be fine.

She rocked him back and forth, tears streaming down her cheeks. In front of her, Dumbledore cursed the last standing man. She called out to Dumbledore, to God, to anyone who would listen.

"Someone, please! Help me! James –," she pulled him close, chocking on her sobs. Her heart... it was suffocating, shrivelling up in her chest. She was panicking, hyper-ventilating. She pulled out her wand and muttered, "Rennerverte," hoping this would revive him. He didn't stir.

Dumbledore rushed over and knelt next to Lily. Tears dropped off her nose and onto James' handsome, loving, young face.

"James, please." She sobbed. "Wake up. This is my fault, forgive me."

"Lily, you must let go. I'll take him to St Mungos. He needs medical treatment." Said another woman standing next to her. Lily shook her head firmly.

"No, I won't let him go! No!" She threw herself over his body. There was nothing wrong with him. He was just knocked out.

Dumbledore rested his hand on her shoulder. "Lily, listen to me. If you want him to be okay, we must take him now. You can come." He told her calmly. She looked up at Dumbledore through her teary eyes.

"P-Promise?" She asked. Dumbledore nodded and two of his men moved in, picking up James lifeless body carefully. Lily watched them go, not able to get up from the floor.

"My parents?" Lily managed to ask.

"They are all safe. Everyone is fine. The ministry should be here soon to wipe the memories of the guests." Dumbledore informed her.

"I want to see them." She said.

Right on cue, Lily's mum and dad ran in. They pushed through the debris and made it over to the sobbing Lily. She cried into her mother's shoulder.

"James? Where is he?" Lily's father asked, looking around.

"It's all my fault," Lily cried. "I froze. I did nothing." She hated herself. Who froze in situations like that? You don't just stand there and watch a spell come towards you. James shouldn't have taken the curse for her. What if he's –? Lily couldn't say it or think it.

"Oh, Lily. Where is he?" Her father asked tenderly.

"St Mungos, the hospital." She sniffled. She had to see him but she didn't have the energy or the willpower to get up. She wanted to pitch herself off a cliff. Or curl up into a ball and never wake up. She wouldn't be able to live with the guilt.

"He should be there now. You can visit him if you feel up to it, Lily." Dumbledore said kindly, standing up again. Mr Evans rattled his car keys in his hands.

"Come on, we're going. I like that kid." He assisted Lily up and off they went.


	28. Chapter 28 - St Mungos

**Chapter Twenty Eight**

Dumbledore met them outside St Mungos and assisted them inside. Lily had never been to St Mungos before and she had a feeling she wasn't going to enjoy it. They walked up to the reception desk and waited in line. Lily was getting impatient. No way in hell was she waiting any longer.

She charged up the line, ignoring all the complaints from the other waiters. She slammed her fist onto the desk, scaring the receptionist.

"I'm afraid you'll have to wait in line, miss." Said the women. She wasn't much older than Lily by the look of her.

"I'm afraid that I will be doing no such thing," she retorted calmly. "James Potter was recently submitted here. I would appreciate it if you could tell me where he is." Lily demanded.

"I understand, miss, but these people are wishing to visit their friends or loved-ones too." The women said quietly.

"That's all very well but –," Lily said, choking up again. "But I just came back from a battle with some Death Eaters, my boyfriend just got hit with an unknown curse, I don't know if he is alive – or – or dead, and I'm in no mood to argue." Lily finished. The receptionist studied Lily for a moment, and then sighed. She checked her files.

"Spell Damage. Fourth floor. Third ward of the right." The woman said.

"Thank you." Lily said exasperatedly. She motioned for her parents to follow her. Dumbledore had left them once they were inside so now it was the three of them.

Lily made her way through St Mungos, pushing past people. They finally ascended the stairs to the fourth floor and pushed into the third ward on the right. James' wars was a private ward, only he occupied it. There was a single bed in the middle of a pretty nice looking room.

He was still out cold though, a Healer bending over him and checking his temperature. She left as soon she saw Lily storm in. Lily sat in the seat next to James and rested her head on his arm. Silent tears streamed down her face. She lifted her head and kissed his forehead.

"I'm so sorry," Lily sniffed. "This was all my fault." Her mum and dad stood beside her, watching silently. Mrs Evans put a comforting hand on Lily's shoulder.

"You guys can go if you want to. I'll be fine by myself. I'd like a little time with him, if that's okay." Lily tried to say it as kindly as she could, but she still felt like she was being rude – they did come _all _this way with her to see James.

"Are you sure, sweetheart?" Mrs Evans asked. Lily nodded, wiped a tear away and hugged her parents. Mr Evans gave Lily one last kiss on the head and left, leaving Lily and James alone.

She sat back down on the chair and held her head in her hands. If she had just listened to Petunia and not gone to the wedding, the Death Eaters wouldn't have followed them and they wouldn't be in this position.

The ache in Lily's heart remained as she remembered all the memories with James. She held his hand and brought it to her lips as a fresh tear dripped of her nose. She remembered the other time, earlier this year, when James had saved her from the Slytherin's. How he had carried her in his arms all the way back to the school. She remembered countless times they had fallen asleep together and all the times they had snuggled in front of the fire.

She leaned back in the chair and closed her eyes, James cold hand still in hers. He looked so pale and fragile, laying their like a crumpled leaf. Lily was reminded once again that it was her fault. She fell asleep as she watched James' chest rise and fall slowly, a small comfort that he was still alive.

She was woken barely two hours later when Dumbledore returned, telling her she had to come back to Hogwarts. She refused to leave James. She knew he would never leave her if he were in her position, so she planned to stay exactly where she was. Lily pleaded with the Headmaster and asked if she could just have one more day, insisting that her friends could bring her any homework she needed. Finally, Dumbledore gave in and promised he would arrange for Remus, Sirius and Peter to stop by tomorrow. Lily went back to sleep.

James woke early the next morning, squinting in the light. His body was stiff and sore. He tried to sit up but a searing pain shot through his bones, so he lay back down. He felt a small pair of warm, soft hands envelope his. He looked over to see Lily fast asleep beside him, sitting in an awkward position on the chair.

The door opened and a Healer entered quietly. She was an older woman with curly grey hair and wrinkled face.

"Oh, I'm so glad to see you're awake, Mr Potter! We feared the worst." She put a bottle next to his bed and gave him a check-up. She looked over at Lily. "Sorry, Mr Potter, but she refused to leave."

"It's fine," he smiled, thinking about how much that sounded like Lily. "Thank you." He added, nodding to the bottle beside his bed. The Healer left quietly.

James reached over to the bottle as quietly as he could without waking Lily. She tired but stayed asleep. He popped off the cap and took a gulp. It was horrible, sliding down his throat like lava. He drank the rest as quick as he could and turned over to watch Lily.

He remembered everything that happened last night; jumping in front of Lily to protect her. He didn't regret it; he'd do it again a thousand times. But knowing Lily, she was probably blaming herself and bashing herself up over it. He kissed each of her knuckles and watched as she stirred to life.

She opened an eye and looked around. Her eyes immediately found James grinning at her. He still looked pale to her and fragile, as though a gust of wind could blow him away.

"James!" She squealed, wrapping her arms around his neck. He winced and she quickly pulled back. "Sorry, did I hurt you?"

"No, no – it's alright." He smiled. She smiled too, though her eyes were pained. Her face changed and she burst into tears. She buried her face in her hands and sobbed.

"Hey, what's the matter? Everything is okay!" James said quietly, forcing himself to sit up.

"I thought you were dead!" She exclaimed. "And it would've been my fault!"

"None of this is your fault, Lils." He pulled her hands away from her face and held onto her wrists. "I'm still here, see?"

Lily nodded and sniffled. James wiped away the remaining tears from her cheeks and scooted over, making room for her. He patted the bed, gesturing for her to hop in. Lily smiled gratefully and snuggled into his warm chest. He stroked her hair, planting small kissing on her cheek.

"I'm so sorry," Lily mumbled again. "If you died and it was my fault, I would never be able to forgive myself."

"But it wasn't your fault, Lily!" James insisted. "I chose to jump in front of that curse and I would do it again any day of the week." He told her. Lily looked up at him through the tears and pressed her lips to his, kissing him hungrily. She put as much love and passion into it as she could.

Even though she told him all the time that she loved him, she wanted him to understand just how much. James had almost died and Lily had had a glimpse of what her life would be like without him. They had been through so much together and James had loved her for song long. How could she not love him back?

They only broke apart when the door opened and Remus and Sirius walked in. Lily pulled away, her cheeks red, and gave them a small smile.

"Woah. I did not need to see that." Sirius said, shielding his eyes.

"Oh come on, Padfoot, you see us snog all the time." James grinned. Lily would've elbowed him but she knew he was probably still sore.

"That doesn't mean I enjoy it!" Sirius exclaimed. Remus shook his head and walked over to the side of James' bed, shaking his hand.

"I'm glad you're holding up, Prongs." He said, gripping his shoulder. "Dumbledore told us what happened." Remus glanced at Lily and gave her a smile. She looked away.

"All in a day's work," James grinned as Sirius sat down in the chair Lily previously occupied. "Where's Wormy?" He added.

"Dunno, he said he couldn't make it." Sirius shrugged.

"So any idea why the Death Eaters were there?" Remus asked the two of them.

Lily shook her head and James said, "Well I'm sure Dumbledore has his theories but he hasn't told us anything yet." They all sat in silence, looking at each other. Lily knew they were all too macho to just hug each other and say how they really feel.

"Well, you seem to be in good hands." Sirius said, clasping his hands together and standing up. "We'll leave you to it." The boys shook hands and Lily watched Remus and Sirius head towards the door.

"I should be out of this joint by tomorrow." James told them. They nodded and waved goodbye. He was able to fully sit up now, so he crossed his legs and faced Lily, who had her legs crossed too. She was chewing on her thumbnails the way she always did when she was thinking. James took her hands in his.

"Don't do that, you'll wreck your nails." He told her. She didn't reply, she just kept staring at her lap. "Okay, what's up?" James asked.

She snapped out of her trance and looked up. Lily gave a noncommittal shrug. "I don't know; I'm just thinking."

"No, that's not it." He said slowly. "I can see your minding working. Tell me what's wrong."

Lily shook her head. "Besides the fact that we just got attacked and I was a complete idiot, nothing is wrong." She said bitterly. The shame had been eating away at her. Usually she was good under pressure. But this time she just froze.

"You're not still thinking about that, are you?" James rolled his eyes. "How many times do I have to tell you it's not your fault?" He said, clearly frustrated now.

"It doesn't matter," Lily said, trying to push the memory out of her mind. "I'll just let you get some sleep. Do you want me to leave?"

James cocked an eyebrow. "Why on earth would I want you to leave? I want you as close to me as possible." He grinned, pulling her onto his lap. He snaked his arm around her waist and kissed up her neck. He slipped his hands under her jumper and traced circles on her bare stomach. Lily pushed him away.

"Please, not here. We're in a hospital!" She hissed. James rolled his eyes.

"Fine." He said. Nothing felt right, he noticed. He didn't like being her, cooped up. And Lily was irritable for God knows what reason.

Lily didn't know why she was feeling so depressed. She just wanted to be alone and brook to herself, but she knew she couldn't do that. It would only make it worse. She was angry. She was just... off.

"I'm sorry," Lily sighed. "My emotions are a bit whacked out today."

"That's okay." James said. Then they were silent again and for once it _was _sort of awkward. Lily couldn't bring herself to look at James, so she looked everywhere else. He watched her carefully, her eyes darting around. She was being very strange. Probably the time of the month, James thought to himself. He knew she'd kill her if he said that out loud.

"Lily," he said finally. "You're killing me."

She stood up impatiently and ran her hands through her hand. "I don't know, James!" She said angrily. James pulled the covers off and got up slowly. His legs felt like jelly but he could still stand. He walked up behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders.

"You need to sit down." He told her calmly, steering her back to the chair. She sat down angrily. James moved around the back of the chair and started massaging her shoulders, up her beck and down her arms. She let out a moan and her head lolled back. James finished and sat down on the bed facing her.

"Better?" He asked and Lily nodded. "Good. I know; I don't like this situation either but once I'm out of here, everything will be back to normal." He told her. She nodded again.

"Lily?" James asked.

"Yes." Lily replied quietly.

"I love you."

She looked up at him and smiled despite herself. "I love you more." She got up and sat on the bed next to him, entwining her hand with his. James cupped her cheek with his spare hand and looked at her eyes, her beautiful hair, her nose, her lips, her elegant cheek bones.

"You are so gorgeous." He told her before capturing her lips. It started out sweet and tender. Lily tangled her hands in his hair. Their tongued danced together playfully, deepening the kiss. She pushed James back, still kissing him, and then rolled off him, breaking the kiss.

"We really need to get back to Hogwarts." James said.

Lily giggled. "I know what you mean." The tingling feeling was back in her stomach. All she could taste was his lips, fresh like pure rain. She wanted him badly, but not here. Always the wrong time, she thought to herself.


End file.
